september edd new babies arriving come share the ups and downs here

[ssmile]

Hello. Think i was first to deliver off the September EDD thread so waving to see if anyone else out there yet to join me :)
Had my 2nd DD on 26aug by C-sec. We now home but struggling with BF and baby lost 10% body weight in 3days. Started to top up with formula in syringe to try give cracked. Bleeding nipples a rest, but milk is starting to drip out now leaking everywhere! Hoping for a better night tonight after 3nights of hourly feeds and snatching 2-3hrs of sleep.
Anyone else struggling too?

Just thought I'd drop In whilst feeding ds3 who arrived safe and well on the 22nd weighing 6lb 8oz.

I've been lurking for a while.

All is going well, I'll catch up and post later

What did the sleep training course involve? I've read the "sleep clinic" book which vgd. Our DS1 is bright has always had 3-4hrs less sleep than average child and vactive imagination. They gave her achiever of week award at school this wk and she been averaging 6-7hrs sleep a night broken up on average every night 1-5am! It's just so very hard to handle as she needs 9-10hrs sleep. She now been crying since 1am :( I feeding baby now and just letting DD1 cry.

It was the millpond sleep clinic book was vgd.

Handed DD1 back to DH, fed babe now hopefully get some sleep zzzzz

DD1 is still up, has been since 1am, now baby got hickcups, I've had 1hr sleep tonight

Ssmile, I honestly don't know how you can cope with a non-sleeper plus a newborn; I am in awe of you, I really am. I thought DS was a crap sleeper (didn't do stints longer than 3 hours until he was 8mo) but that's nothing in comparison. Do you think maybe once your DD gets into the routine of the school day then that might help her? I do hope so.

#Minky*, hope the clinic can help you out.

Congrats lollyheart

The newborn piece of cake compared to her sister who has now been in a screaming tantrum for 2.5hrs my DH is close to tears. Hopefully she raged it out now as gone quiet. We have honestly tried everything with her. It's also why it took 4.5yrs to have second babe! noone believes she is like this at night as she mostly vgd in public in daytime even after only half the sleep she needs. I nicknamed her Mrs thatcher when she was toddler as didn't she live off only 3hrs sleep!

Gd luck everyone for the nightshift x

Ssmile. We went on a course run by the hv for kids with sleep problems and although it was a very stressful journey we did get there. Didn't make the same mistakes with our second child and he was a better sleeper from day 1. It consisted of the controlled crying technique at 10 minute intervals. Stairgate on bedroom door to stop escaping toddler. No dummy or light and no speaking to dc apart from a phrase - time to sleep now. No eye contact etc. Our dd took 5 nights before she broke ! It's meant to take a maximum of three. We were told by hv that we may be the rare occasion it wouldn't work. In the end it did but traumatic and dh and I really needed to work together to support each other through those 5 nights. Dd also screamed so much that she kept making herself sick so we were told to have loads of fresh bedding and towels at the ready so we could appear unfussed when it happened. Since then she has just slept fine apart from when she was unwell. Still not a big sleeper to be honest but at least it doesn't affect the whole house now when she goes to bed. She is none now. Hope that might help or at least make you aware that you are not alone and that it will resolve one day for you. We have come to realise that some kids just need to be taught how to get to sleep - doesn't always come naturally and once they have learnt how to drop off they are fine. Hope it works soon for you guys.
Well, I am still just about managing the breastfeeding but my right booby is still shredded by lo and very sore. I have tried a breast shield on that side and also expressing by pump which is alot more comfortable than letting him keep latching on. I am really hoping that with a few days of not being chewed that I will heal and manage to start again pain free.
Anyway lo just sinking out so gonna sign out now and hit the pillow - sure i will be back agiain before daylight !

ssmile am feeling 4 u :'(
minky have u also tried lansinoh lanolin nipple cram? Fab stuff :-)
lolly congratulations! A teeny baby (in comparison 2 our 3)!! Looking 4ward 2 hearing ur story, hope all went well :-)
Another friend of ours due in just over 2 weeks, aswell as an old colleague, expecting her 1st daughter. Popular time of year!

Lolly - congrats to you - hope the first few days have been good for you all.
Jimmijam - yes have been using the lansinohl and it's good. Midwife thinks the problem is just because of this possible Tongue tie and small bottom jaw and chin of little one that has made his feeding technique more difficult. Having fed three babies now I think that's the case - just wish I could heal this nipple as I think it would be so much better.
Dh going back in to work today - must admit I am looking forward to having my own space back - lovely though it is to have him here, he is still working (runs his own company so no proper time off !) and he has been quite stressed to have around. I have also realised that him getting a good nights sleep is so much better or we argue this way when he is being an ass I just remind him it's not him up in pain every two hours and that he needs to be a bit more supportive. Will see if I still feel as keen to be here on my own by seven tonight ! Still not able to drive after csection so it's easier than normal as I don't have the school runs to do yet for dcs at two different schools that will take an hour each way ! Not relishing that idea with no sleep - will probably need to be up at six am just to get all three of us ready to get out the door. Night shift nearly over - just exhausted day shift to go now - anyone able to slow this roundabout down for a while - it's beginning to make me dizzy !

1 week left then dh finallyy definately gets his paternity leave :-) !!
minky how old r ur younger dcs? Wluld it help u if they were able 2 get bus 2 sxhool? (i know this depends on school arrangements in ur area, £££& their ages& how ud feel about it)

Thanks minkyj for sharing the sleep tips. We ended up doing form of controlled crying last night, as she raged tantrum for 2.5hrs but eventually she crashed out at 9.15pm with no light in her room but consession of light in hallway, door open a bit if she settled herself which worked and she slept till 6.30am hallooloola! We been here before so expect a few more rocky nights ahead but it felt better to take back control of nighttime last night even if we felt awful seeing her so upset. Luckly my DH and I do make a gd team supportin each other. Baby also settled at 9pm so we all got a bit of rest. Baby seems to have a vdifferent temperament to DD1 so hoping we can avoid some of problems we had first time around and I much more prepared to be tough mummy this time around as sleep is so important for everyones sanity!
Can you advise to help baby sleep well I am keeping daytime normal noise, light &fresh air, nightime from 8pm dark,calm quiet feeds but still feeding on demand. We get up 7am bright light nappy change etc. I assuming that when we get to 3mths I can start being stricter with nighttime feeds if baby feeding well in daytime. With DD1 she never slept through the night more than 3hrs until 12mths+ no matter what we tried. I really want to avoid any problems we can with this one. I've got the gd millpond sleep clinic book which has given me some reassurance we going in right direction and its early days at 5wks.

Got a 1hr nap in before collecting DD1 so feel more human this arvo, plus got babe weighed upto 9lb14oz now pleased as she put on 1oz day last 2wks. Everyone at school gates kept sayin she was small so glad I got some reassuring BF is going ok as think sleep deprivation makes you doubt yourself.
I phoned up Drs today to make 6wk check for babe &i to be told oh we don't do those any more its 8wk check, but MW &HV told me to make 6wk one. The receptionist called me back with date at 7wks at 5pm not exactly gd time as will now have 4yr old I tow too and was hoping to talk about mirena coil and 4yr listens&repeats everything!
minkyj hope nipple heals with bit of rest, my very cracked bleeding one did with 48hrs of rest I just expressed, then used shield after. Hope ur breast pain eases and you enjoy time with out DH. I know exactly what u mean, I love my DH help but house feels less stressful with out him here.
jimmijam hope your DP gets his paternity leave sorted.
feralgirl hope tum bug passed their my worst thing ever I can't deal with them vwell. My DH can do sick but hates blood, where as I really hate vomit but have no prob with blood :-) gd team if he around.
lolly congrats hope you enjoying baby cuddles.

ssmmile glad ur lo putting on weight. Our lo was born 8lb 11oz 2 weeks 2days ago. 2day he weighs 10lb 2oz!!! Little piggy!!!!

Finally getting round to joining thread - had our beauitful baby girl 17 days ago and since then it's been a blur of 'why wont she stop eating','why isnt she pooing''why wont she eat''omg that was a big poo'' and finally I think we may, may have reached a poo-eating balance! congrats to everyone, so many beautiful new september babies!! xx

Hey all. Gone a bit AWOL sorry. Trying to rest when I can as LO is having a feeding frenzy the past few days and more awake at night so I'm just trying to get used to it. Which I will just takes a little bit of adjustment time.

LO is now at day 17 1lb over her birth weight from bf alone :) so I'm really pleased she's feeding so well.

My episiotomy bodge is healing better :) and I'm thinking about you know what again!

Hope everyone is doing well or getting there. I'll be back soon properly hopefully.

OH is back at work now so it's learning routine for me and LO now.

Jimmijam - would love for dcs to get bus to school but they are too young 6 and 9 years. Also quite a trek to youngest ones school as we didnt get catchment school so miles away. I will manage once I get the routine going and at the moment dh is doing morning run and my mum or aunt are doing after school which they are quite enjoying ( think my mum is loving being needed as when other two were born we lived in London so she was too far away to help regularly - it's wonderful having family support this time and I feel so much more in control and less worried.
Ssmile - with sleep training we were told to wait till 6 months before going in strongly but they did advise establishing a good wind down routine early on. I used to do a bath every night followed by a feed in their room and then into cot and settle down. I also found that blackout blinds plus curtains made a big difference to sleep and avoiding chocolate which has caffeine and other sugary treats from 4 pm may help with a toddler. Over tired kids also seem worse sleepers so I can understand why your dc struggles. It's such a difficult thing to cope with but like you say you probably won't have the same problem this time around as personalities are different. All I can say to assure you is my kids are good sleepers now so it won't last forever.
Can't thin who mentioned the tummy bug worry - I have a severe fear/phobia of sick bugs - just hearing one is going round breaks me out in a cold sweat - so completely understand that worry.
On the boob and breastfeeding front - one boob now doing well but one still very sore. Bought a manual pump today and am intending to follow the advice to express for a couple of days and then continue to use breast shields. Glad that I have managed not to give in yet as I think it's improving just a little.
Welcome to new posters - sorry I forget your tag name as on iPhone !
Right, off to my favourite place now - land of nod. Will no doubt be back on here during the night time feeds.

Congrats and welcome general and wonderful news about the weight gain ssmile.
This morning I am pissed off with DH. He is so selfish. As he's on afternoons&evenings he's supposed to take ds to school in the mornings and I pick him up in the afternoons. To get ds ready in time he has to get up at 630 and leave at 8 to actually get to school on time. So yesterday I woke up dh to tell him to get ready and to get ds up thinking I could get a bit of a lie in considering the 4 hours sleep I get per night. How wrong could I be??? Dh sat there in front of tv whilst ds came in every 2 mins asking me questions. I got really pissed off so dragged myself out of bed to sort put ds who was still in bedclothes and hadn't even attempted to have breakfast. Dh then proceeded to shout at ds telling him to get ready and eat his breakfast. This was all without putting any kids tv on nor helping him out. I eventually got ds fed and ready in time but at 7:55 I got dd's milk ready as she was screaming the house down. What does dh do? Picks her up just because of her crying for 1 minute. . Why do men do that? Do they think that babies need to be comforted at the exact second they start crying?
So this paved the way for my mood this morning. Dh wants me to do the morning run as he has an appt this morning. Not like I can refuse to do it. Ds needs to get to school. DD woke up for her night feed at 2am. Did he help with that? Hell no. She woke again at 5am. He wakes and picks her up......

To hand her to me to feed . Not once did he offer to help. He expects me to look after 2 children cook him dinner and not get any help from him. Thank god my mum comes round to look after me during the day as I think I would have killed dh by now.

Sorry for the rant but I needed to off load as he has been so selfish and seems to have forgotten the fact that I had to carry DD for 9 months whilst working full-time and looking after ds. Why can't dh just bear the brunt of lack of sleep for once and allow me a lie in? He then had the cheek to ask me why I couldn't go back to sleep now(obviously forgotten we have a son who needs to go to school and wakes up at 630)

Anyway hope everyone else has had a bit more sleep and unselfish partners. I'd better get pumping the milk before ds gets up.

Oh summerpixie, that's tough. I understand exactly where you are coming from. Have been through similar with all three dcs but this time I think I have found a slightly more workable solution for us at least. I end up with the same selfish dh if he gets lack of sleep so this time I have sent him off to sleep on another room so he gets a decent nights sleep. I have also dispatched him back to work earlier than planned and allowed him to book his afternoon of golf this week. So when he starts being an arse I just remind him that if he dares to criticise my mood or complain about my short temper that the alternative can easily be available and that I can stop breastfeeding and he can share the night feeds/changes. He is now doing all the morning school runs and gets up for the two older dcs at weekends and I think that's working so much better for us as I don't feel resentful and he doesn't feel undervalued and under appreciated this way. My only bugbear is that after his golf afternoon for six hours he had the nerve to suggest he might be home late and when I said that wasn't the plan he then started moaning about when he will be able to arrange to wet the babies head with friends - uh like I am bothered about him going out on the razz, having too much to drink and then being hungover the following day and like a bear with a sore head - pointed put that as a new mum I can't even have a night out or more than a glass of wine due to breastfeeding so forgive me if I am not too worried about his social life. Men !!!!!!

Ooh summetpixie hope the rant helped, your DH doesn't sound vhelpful at all. I agree with minkyj with this babe my DH hasbeen dispatched to sleep on sofa bed in lounge ensuring he gets mostly gd night sleep in return I gets lots of support where he can.
Last night our DD1 had much better night only 30min tantrum at bedtime then slept through, and was lovely little girl I've SO missed the last 2wks. Alas baby choose last night to have her worst night yet unsettled from 1-7am so I utter zombie on the school run but the 40min walk made me feel bit better. Hoping can go back to bed now before I have to get her at lunchtime as she still on short days. Roll on next wk when she stays till 3.15pm i won't know what to do with myself all afternoon :o

summer hope rant helped. I also hope u have friends /ppl @ baby groups u can talk to.
My dh is also pretty useless- wen he's doing school run its still me who has 2 get everyone ready & he rolls out of bed 5mins b4 time 2 leave. Etc etc. Luckily im in a good place right now tho. But understand how utterly frustratibg it can feel. Sending hugs

did my 1st nursery/ school run with all 3, luckily all went well & calmly (4 a change) & every1 was in the right place @ the right time :-) yay!
Ds2 fast asleep so did my 1st, v. Sweaty, xbox zumba class :-) followed by a chocolate gu desert :-)

Can someone pls remind me how long it takes (2nd°) stitches to heal? Started getting period like pains again too :-(

Cannot believe how much i want 2 wear knickers with no sanitary pad in!!!
Dh already after nooky! & still broody!

Fil coming 2 stay 2moro 4 a week. Will b lovely 4 him 2 meet ds2 :-)

Haha, jimmi, I am sooo with you on wanting to go back to underwear normality! My stitches are nearly healed 3 weeks on (although this is epesiotomy stitches, not CS) and the lochia has very nearly stopped thank god so hopefully I should be able to do some exercise on the wii and maybe go to my local buggy fit class soon.

Ssmile, I think you said something about being stricter with night feeds at around 3 months? I found that, with DS, he really ramped up the night feeds and the sleeplessness at around that age as they often do a massive growth spurt and need lots of energy for teething. He went from feeding every 3 hours to every 1-2 hours, every single night and also he tended to be awake for much longer in the night as he was more alert and aware of his surroundings. It was around this point that he started refusing to take a bottle from DH too and would scream blue murder if it wasn't me + boob that went to him. We had pretty much total sensory deprivation; layers of blackout blinds and white noise and nothing made any difference at all! I remember someone on a sleep forum thread saying that good sleepers are born, not made and I think she was right!

summerpixie, hope your rant helped! My DH was pure rubbish with DS but he has got much better. We were so bad at communicating with each other when DS was born that we actually separated for a while and had loads of counselling.

Also, on the sleep front, I was wondering what you're all doing in the evenings atm? With DS I started doing proper bed time routine and putting him to bed in his cot (in our room) at 7pm when he was about a month old but I used to then spend the whole evening traipsing up and down the stairs to feed him before I went to bed at 10ish.

DD is still spending the evening on me while I eat and watch TV and coming to bed with me when I go. She baths with me and DS at 7pm but I just wondered when/ if you were all planning to start your bedtime routines with the babies?

I was wondering same thing about bedtime routine. We tried with first babe to start at 3wks all it did was make us utterly stressed as she would scream house down for hrs and refuse to settle. With this babe I'm taking my cue from her. Over the last wk she demanded feed between 7-8pm and if she settles I put her down and go to bed myself if she doesn't my DH just had her in lounge whilst he watches tv etc whilst I have 1-2hrs sleep. If she wants feeding he holds her off with little formula till I get up. Then she been settling after feed 9-10pm and gone till 1-2am. But then the fun starts. Last few nights she been vfussy 1-6am with little sleep.....
I agree I think with gd sleepers born not made its just our DD1 was and still is poor sleeper and has less than 'norm'. We will never know if we "did anything wrong" but would like to try get it better this time around! For all our sanity. I expect our bedtime routine will gradually evolve by 3mths to fit in with DD1 who is bath 6-7pm then bed. What's everyone else doing? I worried that I don't let her cry for a feed in the night should i? She is next to me in her basket so I wake when she fussing, gruntin& wiggling which can be 1-3hrs from last feed &offer her boob if I don't think her nappy needs change, 95% time she feeds then but I only get one 3hr between feeds normally 10pm-1am, then its 1-2hrly rest of night, a 15-20min feed.

Typed a response to all and then couldn't connect so lost the whole lot - story of my night really. Lo has now been fussing non stop since 1am and so far I have had less than 2 hours sleep - wouldnt mind but have to be up early tomorrow for blasted health visitor - likewise yesterday for midwife who didn't show up till 3pm !
Hope dh treads cautiously around my tetchy self tomorrow or could be rather large eruption from south coast area of England.

Lo is just over 2 weeks old. He goes 2 bed wen we do, i just dont talk 2 him, cjange him on our bed then use some baby oil 2 give him a massage (he loves having his legs stroked)-but i dont massage him during the day. Lights on dim, thats it really.
With our 1st 2 dcs we didnt have a proper bedtime until they were about 6months old & went in2 their own rooms, they soon slept thru the night then. Even then it eas just putting down @ same time each night with a bedtime story & musical nightlight going, nothing special but worked well 4 us.

Minky hope u got more sleep. Im in the south west, hoping lo will let me nap wen iv dropped dd & ds1 @ mursery/ school, so no eruptions pleade ;+) tho im sure lo will have different ideas!