Feb 2011 - major topics include PIL abuse, DTD, early waking, odd habits of DP's. And Luther

[40Weeks]

Here we are girls get stuck in

Sorry, we're out of

Tad, I watch law and order uk, its fab. There are two different people on the law team but it's still great tv. It's another new series.
I started running before I got pregnant with Noah after many failed attempts and have just got back into it again after a year off. I really enjoy it but not so much in this heat!

Hey everyone, got through my marathon of a day! S went back to sleep at 6.15 for another 90mins so I got some more sleep too. Both girls woke at 7.45 so I asked DH to get up at 8 to help- he then sulked for the morning because 'he doesn't like being woken up'. Wow, weird, I absolutely LOVE being woken up several times during the night by small children, and it REALLY makes my day when they don't go back to sleep and insist on being walked up and down for hours! He did NOTHING today to help me, miserable selfish sod who thinks only of his own comfort and convenience. Rant over. Maybe.

Imy's been a nightmare too, just screaming and crying unless I give her my undivided attention. She's started hitting me, the dog, etc as well. I'm trying to be patient and give her as much time as possible but it's flipping exhausting! DH has no patience with her at all so he's no help.

Ok, rant really over now, sorry! It's obviously the heat getting to us all!

reastie I do NOT think you are being unreasonable at all. If you having people stay makes you anxious then you have every right not to have them stay. As someone else said, tell your mum how it's already making you feel and just say no. You have to look after Alice and that means looking after yourself as well.

Thanks tad for those links- I think she's a bit young for the phonics (2.4), but the crayola one is ace, we'll have a good look at that tomorrow.

pussing sorry but HAhahahahahaha!!!! at baby being struck by lightning!!!

ledkr do you hire Ella out as a caterer? That sounded amazing! Cant believe your allowance has been cut it's ridiculous. Why is it the hard workers are suffering whilst managers and bankers still get perks and bonuses?

tad I love l&o too, prefer svu to the others but unfortunately I haven't been able to stay awake that late to watch it recently. I used to love criminal minds too but it's not on over here now. Sorry to hear about the job, I'm only doing a few hours here and there but it makes a difference.

reastie I agree with everyone else about your aunt, it's your home and you need the time to sleep/ relax or just not have to worry about looking after someone else when you have A now. I couldn't, and still can't, believe the cheek of ledkr's ILs coming when they did. The only person I'd let stay is my brother as he's old enough to fend for himself food wise and I wouldn't care about waking him up when seeing to B!

puss at the lightning story, that's soooo pfb and it wasnt even you doing it! Brilliant! I hope you managed to get your stuff done though and that you can get some more time to yourself soon. We need a storm here too as it's so humid and hot.

Jane that's great news about the zumba night, would have loved to have seen the men embarrassing themselves

deb my god woman, what a time you're having, really wish I could help out in some way and let you have a rest. at your DH for you, why don't men get it?

knitta glad to hear you have the meds now, they can take a while to work but definitely the best thing I did as it's helped loads. Fingers crossed for you. I think we should write the definitive list of mn dos and donts so we all know how normal we are what we should be aspiring too [sarcastic emoticon]

Had quite a good day today but sad in some ways. My uncle died 5 years ago today at a very young age and I took some some flowers to lay where we scattered his ashes. Can't believe it happened 5 years ago, seems like yesterday sometimes. Good news though about B eating, he's had a crust of bread, a bit of banana and some mango today. I didn't puree anything and just cut into slices and let him get on with it, he seems to prefer it that way.
Phew, I'm off to bed after all that. Got a crossword to finish so should be out of it in 5 mins flat, thats as exciting as life gets in the NeedTo bedroom now...

NeedToSleep at bedroom action - we may have our bedroom back, but at the minute we are both sleeping like we've never slept before!! Anna still not overly fussed on bananas but going to try again tomorrow. Sorry about your uncle but glad you were able to get out and bring some flowers to him. I don't have the patience mental capacity to do crosswords, I always end up sneaking a look at the answers

knittakid glad you were able to get sorted out at doctors. Topics like the approved MN list always float about Chat on a Friday night, helped along with a little

tadjennyp Sofia just turned 6 at the end of June and she is brilliant but she does this "why me", "why do I have to do everything?", when I ask her to pick up something she has dropped etc - its not like I'm asking her to go down the bloody mines Thanks for the Crayola links, will be printing out some Princesses!!

reastie YANBU re your aunt staying, I'm the most go with the flow person I know but relatives don't even call to my house without at least a 10 hour notice period, never mind stay over. I think when you are prone to anxiety etc, your house is the one place you can feel secure, where you can just be, I also was like Jane, couldn't say no etc, but my house is the one place that I am really firm about. No siree bob, no overnighters for me.

debka when you're tired everything just seems so difficult, hopefully tonight will be easier xxxxx

Just about to have a big storm here I think, we are all due to go to the seaside/funfair/playpark (otherwise known as Hell with bouncy castles ) tomorrow, so hope it blows over.

Hi there!

Have only skim read so bear with me

Debka sorry that you had a crap night

Tad sorry about the job

Jane no I don't think that it was bad of you to give the baby sweet potato mash, it's pretty good of you actually, especially if they don't pay for food! You sound like a much lovelier CM than I used to be, I probably would have fed the spaghetti hoops but had a whinge to myself like, "oh FGS, look what they've sent,,,mutter mutter mutter!"

Knitta I feel exactly the same re mood swings, it's horrible and I keep forgetting to take my tablets [sigh] I could probably do to have some counselling too but I can't face it, I feel like I want to put my fist through a wall most days and I'm so impatient with DD1 it's untrue and I'm very snappy with DH! I seem to feel much better on days when the sun is shining though (not often in the grim North)

PussInConverse I was smiling to myself at J falling asleep in the Jumperoo, sooo cute

I'm not a proper MNer either! My sofa isn't leather but it is a corner one and it's chocolate brown, I like it - it's comfy! I don't have any twigs or pebbley shit but I do think that they can look quite nice and I also like the lettering that you can get for walls, in fact, I was contemplating getting some for the DDs' room! And WTF is wrong with Ikea anyway? However, I must admit that I am - shhh [whispers] working class - so I shouldn't be on here anyway You're all going to chuck me off the thread now, aren't you?

Oh yes, and my grammar is shit!

Ooh, Four4me yay for baby news! Congrats to your friend, Hattie Grace is a cute name!

WanderingSheep I got lettering for Sofia and Olivias room I also have letters in my storage room kitchen that say EAT but if you look at them from a certain angle they say FAT PS [whispers] we don't have a Waitrose here, or have Ocado so I'm already minus some MumNetter points!!

We don't have a Waitrose either Wiggles, we shop in

Evening, well it took me a sodding hour to settle dd tonight, I am not used to that. Might be the heat - maybe thats why some of the babies have been playing up?

deb your husband sounds so mardy, sorry but you don't meed to be dealing with him when you've got 2 little ones and aren't getting enough sleep. Really made me on your behalf. Hope tonight is better :)

reastie I agree with what others have said, I have never like having people stay over and now we have the baby I have an excuse to say no which I do if and when needed.

Big congrats to your friend Four4, bet you can't to have a hold of the new little baby!

Needto sorry about your uncle. Its amazing how fast the years go isn't it?

wiggles at S going down the mines, good luck at hell funfair tomo.

wandering working class eh, shocking! Keep that one to yourself

This weather is doing my head in, its too hot for me and according temperature thing on monitor its 30degrees in dd's room at the moment- wtf? Keep checking on her and hoping it'll cool down.

Been to ikea () today for the highchair, they had it but not the tray, buggeration. So will have to go back next week, what a shame! dd had some banana, rice cakes and cucumber today, chewed away on them quite happily, very cute.

Hoping for a sleepy night for all xx

wandering there is an aldi and a B&M over the road from me, I am there most days if I don't have much on just to get dd out for a walk and a nosy at the the tat!

It's really muggy here Ponyo, I've put L to bed in just a nappy with a blanket and DD1 is just in her knickers

I always fret about the room temp, not so much for DD1 as she is old enough to put pyjamas on if she gets too cold or take them off if she gets too hot

really muggy here too

thanks for all your comments re: christening. I would be eaten alive on aibu with that one I think . Think I'll end out having to be accommodating.

ponyo hwow re: ikea - I hate it when that happens

deb personal question you can choose to ignore (and may have been asked before I just forgot) did your dh want children? it's just he seems to useless about some things

needto glad you managed to remember your uncle today. Did Ben go too?

I get ocado - does that make me a true mner? ignores the fact i have brown leather sofas and once owned white trousers . I also don't have a union jack cushion which seems a big deal here too

wiggles at the 'fat' kitchen storage room - it seems oddly appropriate give the rooms purpose

ponyo we'll blame the settling prob tonight on the weather so it will never happen again obviously

knitta glad you got some meds - let us know how they go

Forgot to say when I was in m&s looking for christening gear I somehow managed to get styled by 2 random old ladies wandering the isles of per una I will blame them for the potential fashion faux pas I may release on the world in a couple of weeks

Morning all, a slightly better night here. Feed at 10, settle at 12, feed at 1.30 then up at 5. I thought for a while she'd gone back off after the 5am feed but no, 5 is the new 7

DH has always wanted children reastie, although I'm not sure why, he talks every day about how he's looking forward to them leaving home. It makes me quite sad. On a good day, when the children are behaving, and he isn't ill or tired or in a bad mood, he is fine, just those days are few and far between.

needto at bedroom action!

wiggles the girls will love the funfair, will you be able to sit and drink tea?

I get a bit annoyed at this proper MNer business, all the judgeyness of it. I took the girls into McDonalds for an ice cream yesterday and the people there were lovely and friendly and someone picked up S's hat that had dropped under the table for me. Think I'd rather be with people like that than some judgey MNers. Looked on a thread on AIBU yesterday about bad parenting as well which made me a bit , have they never taken a shortcut once in a while? They all presume to know better than anyone else whilst being totally ignorant of what's going on in peoples' lives.

Cor listen to me all fired up at 6am!!

Haven't heard from delia for ages, is she still on holiday?

Morning deb, glad you had a better slightly better night, still sounds v tiring to me! Totally agree re: judginess, plus I love a MacDonalds

Was wondering where tarlia is too?

reastie what is the big deal re: union jack cushions? I've noticed that too, weird. at the grannies styling you, we want to see photos!

Its still muggy here but looks rainy too (just realised I am talking about the weather again, boooring )

Am going away for a few days so packing and organising today, yay more lists!

Morning all. Not even attempting individual replies but you know i love you all

knitta thats so fab,i didnt really understand what it was tho. If its ssri then it will take about 7-10 days to kick in but sometimes you get an immediate calming effect (i did) you may feel a bit sick too and possibly find it a bit hard to sleep but stick with it cos all that goes off.If they work it will just feel like you are suddenly coping with everything better and less moody. You need to take them for at least 6 months AFTER YOU FEEL BETTER,gps stop them too early sometimes.
Dont worry about being addicted either, you wont.

wiggles what is the approved list?hmm? I once got a mention as giving good advice and being kind i was all chuffed haha.

Not sure what is going on with Dilly ladies. Had a nice day at the pool,lots of swimming,she seemed hungry tho and ate a lot. Went to bed great but woke several times crying.I had put a fan in her room as it was 26,i turned it off but when i put it back on later she woke again.She is crying pitifully but eyes tight shut.Milk shuts her up but very slow cos asleep.Cried as soon as she went down so she slept in with me whilst i patted her tummy.I wonder if its the heat,its soooooo muggy,ive never known anything like it.
Raining today.
Oh yes believe it or not Ella aged 9 had amassive tantrum in the garden last night,i was seeing to Dilly and dh just left her screaming in the garden cos she had been gobby IT WAS TEN O CLOCK. I was so mad with them both i shouted out of the window like a very non mn fish wife HOW DARE YOU GET IN THIS HOUSE NOW, she moved very quickly. I chucked her into bed and she was crying im hungry/ill/scared/feel funny. I cant understand why dh thought that was ok,hot night so peoples windows open. I had 2 texts from neighbours who were concerned

morning,

deb I'm glad to hear the improvement but still think you're a star as I couldn't deal with it!

ledkr do you think Dilly is having a growth spurt? I know that B had a few nights like that then I realised he's actually grown too long for some of his sleepsuits. Still the flippin heat isn't helping anyway. It's raining here too and I'm hoping it'll clear the air a bit. Hope Ella isn't heading for early teenage tantrums or is it the tweeies now (I'm so out of touch)?

Thanks for your comments about my uncle, I took B with me to lay the flowers and he was so good. I've told him all about his great uncle and have lots of photos to show him when he's older. I think that's how we live on, through people's memories. Sorry to get all down, must find my get up and go as it seems to have got up and gone today....

Sometimes I feel a bit of a mumsnet cliche, but as I FF J from week 3, I guess I'll never be truly accepted! Plus I have a tattoo (from a crazy day in Camden many moons ago), and also love a McDonalds. In fact, I may head there for breakfast.

debka glad you had a better night. I was actually crying at 430 this morning. J seemed to be up for the day (thank god she wasn't), and the cat shat in the bath.
reastie Photos. Now. Please.
needto they weren't even being PFB. They are just frightened of, and worry about, everything. But that's a whole new thread.

Childless, skinny, interesting friend coming over today. Gah! Am sure she'll think 'frumpy dullard', but I know she won't really as she's lovely. Do hormones really take a year to settle back down? Have had enough of feeling like this!

Oh puss yuck-i love cats but cant be dealing with the shit puke and killing sprees. I have sat and sobbed with awakefull Dilly in my arms before,i yearn for the days of restfull sleep.
I have a few thin/childless friends.I hate it when they say "oh you look great" and i think well if you think so why are you a size 8 eh?
I feel hormonal today too,i had a bad ish night and dh slept in the spare roomas his turn but he just came up here looking like death warmed up,got into bed and started going back to sleep.I mumbled how strange it was that im the one who was up and he is tired. grrrr.
I think its the massive change in lifestyle that is so hard.I aggree what you said on the other thread about disliking spending you day food shopping or cleaning the house. Im so glad she is my last haha.

Hi girls,

debka glad you had a better night with S.

ledkr poor dilly, hope she is ok. My 9 yr old sister has started to have a wee tantrum now and again, we think it's her hormones she has started to grow a wee pair of boobs too! So strange that my baby sister is growing up

puss ha ha ha ha "cat shat in the bath" sorry.

It's raining here too but still so hot.

Well all this SWI had better work this month as i'm slightly sore now!

Knitta I'm glad you got anti-d's from the doctor, hope you feel better soon. Oh and Yay for Pablo's first tooth!

Hi ladies, I was back from hols last week, but haven't posted much as had no laptop (again!) for about 4 days (DH 'lending' it to work again grrrrr), and do you ever have that thing when you've been 'offline' for a bit that it's hard to jump back in again as so much has happened and you can't possible comment on everything but don't want to ignore people.

But here I am, apologies for those I miss out but:

Ponyo I went to get my Ikea high chair (plus tray plus inflatable cushion thing) yesterday. Bad luck they didn't have a tray for you. I did find myself looking at the children's beds though, just completely unable to put myself in the position where C will be 2 or 3 or whatever and moving out of her cot - there you go, I don't even know what age they move into a bed!

reastie poor you re potential unwanted overnight guests. I know what you mean, I wouldn't really want guests foisted on me overnight, it would be tres stressful (even if I liked the people themselves) if not strictly 'wanted' and also when preparing for Christening. Out of ideas for how to resolve but sympathise with you.

Borg congrats on first night out sans bebe!

Puss I had heard a year to feel properly 'normal' again...yikes!

Ledkr sorry Dilly is struggling at night. This heat is hideous for babies. C is going to sleep in just a vest and no grobag - I fasten it around her arms/shoulders but leave it open, then creep in before I go to bed and zip it over her, but leave the bottom open. C has been waking and yelling a bit around 4am. She's not properly awake though, and I just go and give her a dummy and put her muslin by her face and she jsut drifts off again. Don't know why she wakes though.

Deb sorry to hear about crap nights and crap husband, but glad last night was a little better. I am so spectacularly crap on lost sleep days, it's just horrid.

We have been fine. Went swimming on our own (outwith the Water Babies safety net!) on Tuesday, well my Mum came with us. She's going to have C on Tuesdays and said it would be nice to go a couple of times with me as she might take her when I'm at work. It's nice to think C will still get to go swimming although feels funny that really, when I go back to work, that's it for a lot of the stuff we've been doing during mat leave.

Am totally not motivated for work at all, in fact, I feel a bit useless, as I can't be arsed with work, but defo don't have it in me to be a SAHM either (even if we could afford it, which we can't), so I'm not really sure what it is I 'want' at the moment, not that I have a lot of choice in any case!

Have my two nursery trial sessions booked in the week after next...really weird.

Claudia has been basically quite fun to be with the past few weeks. Had the odd whingey days (mainly teething I think) but other than that she's been good and nice to be with.

Food is going well. Not sure though when to start giving more food and cutting back milk. She so far has just had rice/porridge, fruit and veg, so the milk is still the main thing for protein and fat etc. I feel like the first bit of weaning has been easy, but not sure where to go from here.

Sorry for mammoth long post, just a 'stream of consciousness' thing I think!

Hope today is nice for you all ladies.

Dx

Hi delia, well done on the swimming, we are yet to take A but need to do it in the summer hols so dp can come with me, am too chicken to do it myself! Hope you had a good hols.

sorry puss but I did at cat shat bath too. One of my very closest friends is also v skinny, childless and interesting - I worry I talk about dd too much but then what else have I got going on eh Haha, think its us worrying more than anything but I do feel fat next to my thin mates too, grr.

ledkr i really do think its the weather resulting in unsettled babies, I've never known anything like it with dd last night, was very stressful. at fishwife (sorry)

Can I just moan about dp - I was trying to settle dd last night, just putting dummy in and shushing, kept going in and coming straight back out, he went in to do it and started talking to her "now then little baby..." and generally faffing about in her room Thats going to wake her up!! If I am being too picky you can all tell me, think I might be being unreasonable

Oh and jane I'm not surprised you're abit sore!

i say to dh "dont speak to her or look at her please" haha

delias delila is a bit die hard in the pool,goes blue before i get her out and then has a mini meltdown.She doesnt care if she is splashed or dunked either. Ella was the same,i went to India for a few months to get over my marriage break down and took her and ds1,we were literally on the beach every day and Ella was like a mermaid.When we were back home she gave lifeguards a heart attack cos he was just leaping into the pool and swimming underwater and was about 18 months

Well.Dilly has just done a massive pooh and it was a bit yucky.I wonder if she had belly ache over night.She had lots of fruit and veg yesterday so going to keep it plain today.

reastie I sympathise. I am putting off D'd christening cs i will have to have pils and the others will stay in a b and b but still expect to congregate at mine even tho ill be doing food etc.im working on being assertive cos i want dilly christened whilst still a baby iyswim.

ponyo DP very annoying, I get irrational when people undo my good work. A cute elderly lady came to neb at Nate yesterday in his pram when he was asleep, and her dog barked and woke him up. I was

puss ew! I'm not really a cat person, they're too aloof. I want the unconditional slobbery love of DH a dog. I bumped into a skinny, impossibly glamourous, successful girl I knew from Uni the other night (says the other night like I have been out more than once). I was at great pains to mention I'd "just" had a baby to excuse the fact that I looked crap!

jane boobs! eek!

ledkr what's up with your girls then? They're just feisty girls with personalities, you don't want boring babies who coo happily in a corner do you?!

reastie loving the idea of you being styled by an elderly trinny and susannah team, we need photos!! I really don't blame you for not wanting anyone round, personally I would have never stayed at anyone's house if they had a young baby even if they were good friends/family.

delia ooh lots going on. My friend was saying she dreaded going back to work but really likes feeling normal now, and finally has other things to talk about other than the baby. She said she just slipped back in really quickly and was like she was never away. I am still dreading it though!

wandering I get that holiday feeling in Aldi too! Glad it's not just me....

Deb glad your night was better, sorry Imy being a pest. We were up 2 hourly last night. Why!!!!!!!!

Right, I think we may be off to the aquarium today for an educational trip for nate and some ice cream for me with DH as he's off today. We are still not really getting anywhere with the weaning, he only seems to like baby rice and retches/gags loads on anything else. He also won't let me feed him, and rams his spoon in sideways really far back (so prob why he is retching all the time) but just shuts his mouth if I try. Might try those snacks ledkr suggested and reastie ate

Borg re weaning, maybe if he wants to be an 'independent eater' perhaps a BLW ish approach might be the way to go? I'm not doing it myself as I'm a bit too much of a control freak and wanted to get her a little bit established before I go back to work, but like you say if you just offer him things he might start in his own time. Or, continue with baby rice and see if you can mix things into it to get him used to other flavours.

Nice to read what your friend said about going back to work. I think it will be good for me and in many ways I am looking forward to it. I think it's partly because I spent so long waiting for maternity leave, that going back to work thinking this might be it until I'm 65 or 68 or whatever it will be, is making me a bit ambivalent towards the whole thing. Not that I am even close to thinking about another baby but more that getting back into the work culture with nothing 'big' to look forward to is making me a bit . Need to book another holiday methinks!

Ledkr C is pretty good in the pool too. I make a point of splashing her face a bit and getting water on her head (in an affectionate way, not in a mean way, I hope!), as I was always a bit scaredy cat of putting my head under when I was a kid (although always loved swimming in general).

Funny what you say about food and tummy ache etc. I'm trying not to over analyse, but if C has a whingey period, I'm always thinking 'is it because you had pears?' etc.

Ponyo DHs don't always seem to get the 'rules' do they? And no matter how much you explain, they don't seem to get the reason for them. We had a few odd evenings a couple of months ago until I figured out DH had been putting C to bed after only half her bottle, after I had said 7pm is lights out and bedtime. I never meant put her to bed hungry if she's not finished her bottle, I meant we need to schedule bathtime and bottle etc. so that 7pm is bedtime, and that we don't do play and talking after that time.

One thing I meant to ask in my earlier post, what kind of pram/buggy are people using these days? We had an old M&P Pliko Pramette from my sister to start with, but C is almost too big for the lie down pram bit now, and hates lying down anyway, and so she is in the sit up bit, but it's heavy, so I'm looking at more lightweight buggy type things. The Baby Jogger City Mini comes highly recommended, so I was almost decided on that, but then MIL has a thing about having the baby face her, so the only other lightweight option seems to be the Quinny Zapp Xtra, but reviews say it's hard to fold. Any suggestions, thoughts? Never mind if not, this paragraph is so boring I've almost fallen asleep typing it.

Enjoy the day folks.
Dx

Im still using my oyster carrycot but use the buggy attachment when i know she will be awake and nosey.
Borg id just go with the baby rice then,you arent meant to offer too many different tastes at first. Dilly wouldnt eat at all but after 2 days of blw she now eats ok. Try the organix they are brilliant.I just had ago at dh cos he just left one of the bags open to go soft and they are tres expensive altho 4 for 2 pounds in saisburys at the mo.
It pissing down here but i am swealtering and Ella is still fecking moody,tis an early night for her tonight,mark my words.