Hello ladies,
Got home from lovely holidays to find the terrible news about magic. I was totally lost for words (still am, really), had to give it some time to get my head around it. How very sad for her and her family. 
Do you do this as well sometimes: Maybe I'm just weird but sometimes I think about what would happen if I were to die, and nowadays well it's all about I. and it makes me feel really bad, how he would have to grow up without his mother, how he would never really remember me, how there would just be someone missing. And sad for myself too, how I would never get to see him learn to talk, go to school, figure out what he wants to be in life, meet someone special, ... then I shake myself out of it. It's just that these days I feel like there is so much to live for. So I am more scared of dying than I ever was, before I. arrived. Accordingly I find it extraordinarily sad that Magic died, she and family have been in my thoughts a lot.
On a more positive note, I. is 1! What a year it has been. I feel blessed to have him, to have had this year with our little family.
On the afternoon of his birthday he developed a fever, which lasted for three days and was followed by another three days of a rash all over his body. We think it was Roseola Infantum. It was the first time he had a proper fever, typically on his birthday! Well actually, he had a fever once before, that was exactly a year earlier, when he was born - luckily, because that made them look for causes, pick up the infection, and treat him immediately with the ABs that probably saved his life. Yeah, I guess him turning one made me reflect a bit on the whole birth experience again. He didn't much care - he did burn his finger on the candle though ;)
Re sleeping, well we have our highs and lows. Sometimes he sleeps from bedtime to about 5ish without interruption, and then in the mornings, one of us goes and sleeps with him on the sofabed in his room until it's wake-up time. We'd take him into our bed, we're fine with co-sleeping, but it's a lot lighter in there and he won't sleep. So one of us in his room it's got to be. That's great, really, however unfortunately it's a bit of an exception - usually he'll wake and need settling at least once before that, and if it's me, he'll insist on a feed. I too could do with more regular good sleep, though things have definitely already improved a lot. And yes, I do put it down to the NCSS, at least partly!
Louise, Phoebe Grace sounds lovely. Not long to go now. I hope you are managing to relax a bit every now and then - I imagine things to be very tense for you these days. Can't wait to hear some good news in just a few weeks time :)