Totally's postgrads - you know who you are.

[Meita]

Totally's original thread was for TTC after MC. It continued long after Totally herself graduated, and is still going strong. Totally's grads was set up as a thread for pregnancy post MC - i.e. anyone who graduated from Totally's thread and anyone else who had experienced MC and was now pregnant. It, too, is still going strong.

Now, more and more of us have graduated from Totally's grads - including LouiseSH, whose Georgie was born asleep. I suppose that makes us postgrads. We have travelled together for a long time and would like to stay in touch, but the pregnancy post MC thread is starting to get very big, and I think it should be allowed to keep its focus on pregnancy post MC. May it be as wonderful a place for support for current "members" as it was for us.

So this thread is a place for us to keep in touch, share experiences, and provide support.

(This is the first time ever I'm starting a thread - hope it works out...)

heya,
Ianto, now 5 months old, still is very hard to get to sleep during the day if not either being held or in the buggy/car seat. Sometimes he goes to sleep in his bouncer chair, which is great.
Initially that really annoyed me as it meant I couldn't sleep when he did. Now that I get a bit more sleep at night, I don't mind very much. I get to relax and cuddle him and watch some TV or read a book. It's an excellent excuse for not doing much housework, too!

Oh what a night...

So I carried on with the feeding on demand thing, and it really does seem to have settled the wailing - I can't believe it was my fault! Am a bit with the stupid MW. But... it does mean I have her constantly from around 6pm until 2am because she just won't go in her basket at all. I cried at 2 o'clock thinking I would never sleep again, so DH did a nappy change for me and then we ended up co-"sleeping" until the next feed at 4.30. I'm not really convinced I can make our bed safe enough, although it's ok at the moment while she can't go anywhere.

But then after 5 o'clock she settled in her basket, and did feeds every 2 1/2 hours until midday. Which is fine, and I managed some proper sleep, but the worry is when DH goes back to work, it's no good her sleeping all morning but keeping him awake all night, how on earth will he cope!?

Aaaaah... if it's not one thing it's another!

Good to see you over here on the other side clare... you'll be with us very soon. Might try the hot water bottle thing tonight.

At last, weight gain! Hurrah! Only 70g since Monday, and on different scales, right after a big feed and just before he filled his nappy somewhat explosively... Still, I'm happy. It got rid of the health visitor rapidly too and she's not coming back anytime soon thankfully (same one I saw with DS1, she doesn't really listen and is as much use as a chocolate teapot...). Midwife coming back Friday so need to keep up my schedule of feeding and expressing at the same time (thank goodness my doula taught me rugby ball holds early on) then bottle feeding the ebm as top up right away... Have tried the once a day formula feed, he takes 2oz grudgingly whilst staring at my chest, refuses any more and as soon as the bottle's gone cries for a feed. Cheeky thing, but better that than my fear that he'd start refusing the boob. Also has learned to feed when I'm lying down, a godsend at 2am (we have long evenings nonstop feeding like you Toomt, and I've woken a couple of times to find he's helping himself!!

We also get our best sleep in the morning. I'm not sure how long I can carry on getting my mum to come round first thing to get DS1 up and out... Before long I'm going to have to get myself up at 7am and out by 8.30... Maybe next week... Or the one after....

Meita, DS1 never napped in a cot either, he'd only drop off in his buggy or sling. I used to take him for a walk in the morning and stop for coffee whilst he slept, and in the afternoon he'd sleep on my knee or in the sling whilst I rushed round doing school run and making tea (thankfully stepkids all old enough now not to need meeting from school any more and are very happy to self cater if their favourite ready meals are in the fridge!)

right better go, pump to wash ready for next feed and bottles to sterilise... I guess when my supply is up and feeding improves it's going to all be a doddle...

TMT have you got a sling? Is a fantastic thing for a non-horizontal baby. dd was one... we barely got any use out of her moses at all.

So how come i'm finding this time so much harder when Himself is a much easier baby?

Fabulous lots of advice on sleeping, much appreciated. Will have a good read tonight whilst feeding, with hot water bottle at the ready!

Newsflash from GildaTowers - I left the house for the first time today! We got as far as the park when the rain started but it was far enough to get some fresh air. Lovely to see some snowdrops and a few daffs poking their heads out to see if it's spring yet.

Wanted to welcome Clarea to the thread, still can't believe how fast the time is going. Very envious of your beautiful timed countdown. I wish my section had been planned, Christmas would have been much more relaxed! Ah well, all well that ends well. Hope you are feeling comfortable and enjoying the last month. I actually miss my bump, was really odd putting my coat on today and being able to do it up all the way down!

Toomt sounds like things are starting to work out, at least the wailing is under control. Wishing you super good luck on finding a solution that works for you and DH. Think your MW deserves a sharp wedgie!

Alba HOORAH for the weight gain! Well done little man.

Thanks for the book link Meita - it's on order. Ren is reacting really well to massage so far, but will be good to have some direction!

Buffs must be tougher having two little ones, even if the littlest is easy. How is your DD coping with having a brother? And how is the pup, must have grown loads by now!

So lovely seeing more new faces on the old thread, and wonderfully brilliant to see old faces (no offence!) over here. Of course we have to kidnap Jolls this year.

Gosh! Not month, hopefully you are already tucking into that sleep number 17 Clarea!

Hi Ladies! So glad to read a few posts and hear that we're all having similar experiences. Winona was refusing to be put down for the last 3 weeks, tried her car seat and swing and ended up sleeping with her in my arms in a recliner - a little scary. She is now laying down for short naps in her bassinet if swaddled tightly.

She's been a challenge with lots of fussing due to gas, but we're starting to get the hang of it - or maybe just used to it
I have a breastfeeding question. Winona's been only eating for 10 min or so on one breast every 3-4 hours or so. Do you think this is enough? She's 5 1/2 weeks now.
Take care ladies and I'll pop back i soon - so glad I found you all. :)

Yay! Delighted you found us Zayja. What's the post natal check up protocol like over the water? Does Winona get weighed regularly? If she's putting on the expected weight gain and seems satisfied with how much she's getting fed then I would hope it's all going well. Obv I have no experience so listen to the others but suspect we will all differ in feed times and patterns.

Just checking back through the thread for gas tips myself. Ren had another big yelling session this evening and his poor belly was like a balloon. Encouraging chants from DH of 'burp man, ffs BURP' sadly did not help. He looked like a snake which has swallowed an elephant. (For those who remember The Litttle Prince and the picture which is not a hat).

LOVING the hot water bottle in cot tip. Not only has Ren gone down without waking, I have the happy pleasure of cosy toasty toes to settle me after I've got up to change him!

Hoping everyone is having a good night and that the babies are going back down swiftly after feeds. x

Updated list
2010
Totally - with daughter Faith Juliet born 16th Feb, 9lb5oz
Amyboo - with son Matthew James born 30th March, 10lb3oz
Hoops - with son Benjamin Scott born 2nd April, 7lb4oz
Memorylapse - with daughter Olivia born 16th April
Jacanne - with daughter Lotta Eliza born 20th April, 8lbs 5oz
Becky78 - with son Thomas Christopher born 22nd May, 9lb 1oz
Meita - with son Ianto born 23 August, 7lbs 4
Boodleboot - with daughter Alice Elizabeth born 10 Sep, 8lbs 2oz
LeeWT - with son Andrew Anthony born 28th Sept, 7lbs 14oz
TFLS - with son Charlie born on 30th Sept, 6lbs 8oz
SamB - with daughter Ruby Mae born 19th Oct, 7lbs 10oz
Effilump - with son Arlen born 16th Oct, 8lbs
Sarahlou8 - with daughter Emily Isabella born 21st Oct, 7lb8oz
Unbuffy - with son James Anthony born 3rd December, 6lb8oz
HappyGirl - with daughter Ciara born 10th December 8lb2oz
Malteser1981 - with son Eli born 18 December, 8lb 6oz
Zayja - with daughter Winona born 19 December, 7lbs 11oz
GoodLuckBear - with son James born 25th December, 8lb
Sparklyrainbow - with son Alex born 28th December, 9lb 7oz
2011
BunnyBaby - with son Daniel George born 5th January, 10lb 1oz
AlbaDeTamble - with son born 10th Jan, 8lbs 10oz
Gilda - with son Ren Taylor born 10th Jan, 8lb 4oz
WestYorkshireGirl - with daughter Hester Rose born 14th Jan, 6lb 4oz
Redheadgal - with daughter Cecily Anne born 13th Jan, 8lbs 13oz
Toomuchteaching - with daughter Jemima Ella Phoebe born 17th Jan, 8lb1/4oz

In our thoughts and prayers:
Louise with daughter Georgie born asleep on 10th October 2010

Woohoo Jemima just slept for 3 hours! Admittedly it was in our bed which is so not the plan but still.

I realise the fact I am typing this at 5am shows how life has changed.

Welcome zayja, lovely to see you again and hear Winona is doing well.

Right, feed done, basket time

Go Jemima go!

When you get used to it (and get enough of them) it's amazing how well you can cope on 2 to 3 hour sleep nuggets isn't it?

Final tip is to beware the timewarp of mumsnet in the early hours after putting little one down... costs me atleast half an hour after each feed. Gilda stop lurking AIBU!!

Sorry, gratuitous post from me to record tonight's sleep pattern as I can never remember the following day! Realised I have posted each time I have put Ren back down in cot. Am lucky I don't have school runs to do so am off for another sleep nugget, if bambino allows, he's definitely more awake this time and determinedly wriggling. (Hot water bottle too cold and am too lazy to go make a new one). Hoping he will drift off anyway, possibly rather over optimistic of me! Hope everyone has had a good night. Toomt any better?

Gilda GRIPE WATER is the way to go after 1 month (so a bit soon for you I think). We're living off the stuff atm! Positions for helping bring up wind ime are: The Bongo Baby (see earlier post - resting accross knees face down while being pummelled winded, dangling in front of you held under the arms swaying gently from side to side, The Weeble - sitting on the knees bending (baby) in circles from the waist like a weeble; bending baby at the waist from almost lying flat to bending forward and back again, and the old bending forward over hte hand and patting the back when you are exhausted from all the above. plus i seem to remember someone swearing by bouncing on an exercise ball holding baby?

also sleepless again here, we are suffering with Snot again, so when james was not waking me up dd was. yaaaawn.

puppy is very well btw, 6 months and housetrained now, and great at keeping dd entertained - they are pretty inseparable which is nice. plus she (pup) seems to have more or less got over her fetish for chewing/sleeping on anything small, white, fluffy and generally hard to wash... and there's a lot of that sort of thing around with a little baby, isn't there?

must go DO stuff... energy, energy, where are you? may have to look out any remaining glucose tablets...

Hi Zayja good to see you!
I think there is no general rule about how often/how long babies should BF. My medical clever book says the only way to know if a baby is getting enough food is if he/she is gaining weight along the centile lines. (Probably that's a bit too mechanistic, as some babies tend to zig-zag upwards rather than following the lines)
My 'alternative' clever book claims that your milk production will adapt to your baby's feeding habits. That is, if your baby eats often and lots, you will produce less nourishing milk; if she eats little, you will produce more nourishing milk. Either way, she will get exactly what she needs. (Probably that's a bit too naively optimistic-believing-in-mother-nature. If your baby isn't feeding enough for a specific reason, for example because of being ill, your milk supply might just adapt by going down, creating a viscious circle)
I think that over all, if she appears happy and well and is not getting notably thinner, you needn't worry.

Hello all! So this is where you're all hiding :)

Things are generally going pretty well at this end. I'm refusing to worry about bf and slapping myself with a wet metaphorical fish whenever I start to question whether is she getting enough. The reason I say this Zayja is that Cecily is doing exactly the same - 10 minute feeds from one breast which keeps her going for several hours. Saw MW yesterday who seemed happy with the ahem 'output' and she's now well above her birth weight so she's clearly just very efficient. But like every new (and old) mum I'm still fretting about it.

She was mithering a little last night so my DH - bless him - comforted Cecily and they slept in the spare room so that I could catch up on my sleep. I'm still feeling pretty rough from the PE and C- Section. He brought her in for feeds though and then settled her next door with him. Feel eternally grateful that he's done all this before. I'm a complete novice with children, but he seems to know instinctively what works.

How long does it take to really start to feel better after a c-section? I still have loads of random aches and pains and can't get comfortable in bed. Anyone else in the same boat?

Hi Redhead how's it going? It took me 6 weeks before i felt 'normal' again this time - but i do have a toddler to run around after, lots of bending etc. I think last time (elective not emergency) was easier but cannot really remember - it WAS 2 years ago!! I still get random pains and i think you can expect them for 6 months or so if i remember rightly especially in very cold weather. BUT some people seem to get over cs very much quicker, so not sure how much help this will be!

Seem to be answering random people, sorry all! I'm not ignoring anyone, but can only deal with one thing at a time, am sure you all know what i mean!!

Zayja as long as she's gaining don't worry. All babies are different and have different needs, and when she needs more/longer feeds etc she WILL let you know. Loudly!

And apologies for all the exclamation marks in that post!!!

A quiet posting night - hope that means everyone slept well. This lovely man went down at 12.30, woke at 3.30 then slept till 7.00 so I feel almost human!! Had bloody awful crying session last night though, now seems a set routine that we get the howling hissy fits from 10pm, and I had a bonus afternoon session too . So, Buffy hugs thank yous for the Baby Yell-Yoga positions!

Redhead what a diamond your DH is, and loving the term mithering. At the moment I seem to be doing quite well after the c-section, though we have to urgently find an alternative changing table (using a big, sturdy, but rather low ex-coffee table) as my back is really aching and having slipped a disc in the past I have to be very careful. If my back goes while I am bending over it I will be stuck and temporarily incapacitated so not what we need right now! Usually I do regular yoga to keep my back supple but am worried I can't do this for a while after the csection. I don't want to stretch and do any damage. So c-section causing me grief not by itself, but indirectly. Of course it also may weaken my back further so potential for more trouble later.

Also re not lifting etc I have a bugaboo frog and to get in and out of the house I have to bump it up or down a quite a few steps and that was a bit of a trial yesterday. Still, probably lighter (and less wriggly) than Buffs DD so I should thank my lucky stars!

Right, we are off to Ren's hearing test this morning. Wishing everyone a good start to the day x

Unbuffy, I'm totally with you on only being able to concentrate on one thing at once!
Thus, sorry I don't mean to neglect anyone, when I answer just to one poster... (also, often once I've finished one reply, my attention is needed elsewhere)

RHG, I was lots better already after ten days. I remember when it was exactly 10 days since Ianto was born, I thought back to 10 days before his birth, and decided I was now feeling better than then. Of course, with Ianto not being well, I was wholly focused on him and kind of unaware of my own sores and aches.
Now, 5 months later, I get occasional random aches in the c-section region, might be CS related, but could also be down to my body getting ready to ovulate again or some such thing. No idea.
Is your blood pressure being monitored? I can imagine the healing process taking longer due to the double whammy of PE and CS.

But, hi, and glad you're (over all) well!

Hearing test went well (no suprise, he always reacts to sound) and despite the utterly dismal weather I slept quite well so am feeling pretty perky. Also realised that I had not yet dipped into the Elle Deco I bought just before Ren was born so am now planning an hour on the sofa with a massive mug of hot chocolate and house porn. Joy.

Wanted to say that I think we need to take it as read that none of us have luxury of posting at will and with unimpaired recall so interboodle etiquette will be acceptably lax!

Happy afternoon to you all. God just realised it is Friday too, so I will raise Buffy's exuberant exclaimation marks and sign off with a big giddy wave to all !!!!!!!!! x

PS Toomt how are you doing? I hope you've managed to get some sleep and your eardrums are recovering.

WestY how's the slumber factor in your household? Hope you are settling in well with Hester.

PSS - If any of you enjoy design / house porn, then you may enjoy this

Gilda we were on the same schedule as you last night... Too tired to focus on phone screen to post though... I'm so relieved breastfeeding is working, not having to get out of bed to make up bottles in the middle of the night is so good... And feeding lying down particularly great (only one side though, waiting for nasty crack to heal the other side before I risk letting him latch on his own).

Our top news for today is that we're finally signed off from midwife care (on day 18!)... Up 5oz since Monday. Greedy guts is starting to feed a bit better but is terribly slow... I wish we had such short feeds as you Zayja! In my experience, amount of time on the boob most definitely doesn't correlate with amount of milk drunk...

Got to go, venturing out to collect DS1, time to get us all bundled up to face the freezing cold

Started a post at 8 o'clock this morning to say no, no more sleep, and have only just got back to finish it.

We didn't manage any basket time last night... she fussed and fed through to just before midnight, then was up at 1.30 when we fed and then co-"slept", up at 4 for feeding and crazy nappy changing until 5.30, then some more co-"sleeping" until 7.30, when she fed and then settled in her basket. I don't understand why she can do it in the morning but not night.

Weirdly I'm kind of coping with it, but DH is becoming increasingly nervous about going back to work. Speaking of which... his school have just phoned to say they're expecting him back on Monday. Now... I went into labour on Monday morning, so surely he wasn't on paternity leave then, he didn't have a baby!?! He was looking after me. We were expecting that his PL started on Tuesday, and he would therefore be going back on Tuesday, but they're expecting him on Monday. I can't find a definitive answer anywhere, so if anyone knows whether labout counts as part of PL I'd be very grateful. I was mentally prepared for him to go back on Tuesday, and am feeling quite perturbed that it might be Monday.

In good news... Jemima had put on 40g on her day 10 check, so that's the -70g covered, plus 40g, which is great. We also took her into town today and discovered that everyone talks to you when you have a baby, but that some people are idiots and don't even try to get out of your way!

Anyway, since we've been home I started feeding her at 4pm, and she's now been either on the boob, having her nappy changed, or crying since then... looks like I'm in for the whole evening. Seriously, she takes herself off my boob, lies there for a few minutes yawning, and then cries. And the only thing that works is feeding her, even though she doesn't really feed properly. I'm at a loss.

And we'll be going til midnight again for sure.

Congratulations on being signed off and on LO's weight gain Alba, lovely news. Well done those

Louise glad to hear you hooked up with the lovely feisty ladies on the ttc side. How are you doing? Looking forward to hearing good news from you, but hoping the meantime is passing kindly.