December 2008: because i unwittingly finished the old thread

[waitinggirl]

oops. sorry. didn't realise i was post 1000. hope people find this...

Oh Trace, poor P, but as others have said, you have nothing to feel guilty about. I bet we all let our toddlers play unsupervised. I do all the time and I don't have any stair gates. And if either of my girls hurt themselves my default assumption is that they are only crying because of the shock. A&E would not enter my head for ages.

BTW Trace I was amazed by the bedtime routine you described a few posts back. I can't believe you get L in bed so early. I am so jealous. Like you I wanted to protect my evenings buy as DD1 turned four she just wouldn't go to sleep at 7 anymore. If I insisted she would go to bed but stay awake for hours. Now I have relented and she stays up 'til 8pm then goes straight to sleep. DD2 still gies down at 7 thank goodness.

Spot, sorry you are ill again. Re discipline I also do warning, then count to five, then a minute on the naughty step followed by a request for an apology and then a cuddle. I save all this for real crimes like spitting (DD2's horrendous new obsession), hitting and playing with switches (DD2 keeps blowing fuses by quickly flicking lights on and off). It seems quite effective. Usually she stops as soon as I start counting. You asked how to make them stay on the naughty step. I sternly order her to stay and if she gets up I silently return her to the step with no eye contact or attention. After a few times she gets the message and nowadays she rarely bothers to move.

We had a fab Halloween party yesterday. We were bombarded with v cute trick or treaters and then took our lot out and found pretty much every house was displaying a pumpkin and the whole neighbourhood was out. It felt like a real community night. Our next door but one neighbour even handed out mulled wine to warm the adults as we watched the kids career about.

V quick question for those with older DCs. What age should they be able to fully dress themselves. DD1 won't even try and she is four. How will she get dressed after sports when she starts proper school next term?

Oh and huge Congrats to Modern!! Sounds like the perfectbirth. Lovely news. Let us know the name you choose.

Oops forgot to say a massive CONGRATULATIONS to modern earlier...fab news

avo DD started school in Sept. They have to dress themselves after PE, She is great at it, looks very tidy when picked up after a PE day, yet flatly refuses at home. Occassionally she will attemp but it takes her ages. I didn't think she would be able to do it either but I think its amazing what they will attempt when they see everyone else trying. In fact I have recently discovered that she can do a lot more than I think .....

Off to toddler group soon, hopefully DS won't bite anyone this week.

Oh Trace, it could happen to any of us. Seriously. I mean, how can we have our eyes on them all the time? I know it's the worst feeling in the world when they hurt themselves but try not to worry. She won't be blaming you and neither will anyone else. And thank you to you and everyone for your kind and helpful words about DP and the sleep/feeds situation. He has bucked his ideas up a little bit.

Spot, I didn't commiserate about yourlack of hol. What a rotten shame! I am glad nursery can have T today so you can get a little rest. As to chucking food on the floor...it was the bane of my life. It has taken DD1 about 5 months to stop doing this. I think what helped was ignoring it because it's basically attention seeking behaviour...

Avo, I loved the FB pics of your party, the girls looks v sweet indeed. Mulled wine for the grown ups! Mmmm. I had mulled wine at a winter football match in Italy, once. Just the antithesis of what would be available in Britain, really When we picked O up from the babysitters yesterday evening, there were lots of TOTers about. One lot of parents had a brazier on their drive and were cooking sausages.

Ooh, Veggie, are you coming back to our shores at some point? Glad you had a nice night out.

OOh, do you know I think I am finally turning a proper corner with the healing. I suddenly feel a lot better. Still knackered though, but that's just normal I guess... in fact I have a splitting headache but I know that's only tiredness. The girls are just so cute. I am still finding it such hard work but they are such poppets and O is now fully happy again with life and her sister. Mind you, the other day in the car, DD2 was crying because she was due a feed, and we heard O say in a quiet voice "Be quiet, Dahlia! Dahlia, shush!" I think she only used a quiet voice as I suspect we weren't meant to hear

Went to my storage yesterday to load up some furniture and take it to the house. I regretted using the cheapest people I could find as it suddenly turned out there was a limit on stuff they could take and also a time limit. So rubbish, so annoying and not what had been agreed. Anyway, I was overjoyed to be reunited with some of my furniture and also some of DH's again. I can't believe we still aren't in the house. But DP has been horrendously busy with work since paternity leave and just hasn't had time and there are still lots of bits to do...sigh. Some things take so long - eg, in the living room, though it has been painted, a three inch gap at the edge has been left as it was quickly rollered, and I have to fill in with a small paint brush and there are loads of beams and it will take hours and hours and hours. That probably sounds piffling but I just feel that if these things aren't done before we move in they never will be. And the little entrance hall is a messy nightmare...and that, the kitchen, the downstairs shower room and the bathroom haven't been decorated. Later in the week I may try to take the girls over in the day. Hmmm, we'll see.

Where's Beans? She hasn't been on since the race.

Avo DS1 could dress himself around about the time I couldn't comfortably bend forward whilst preggars with DS2. It was a case of he had to do it. I would set his clothes out, supervise him so he got things the right way around etc, but otherwise he caught on quite quickly. At school they remove their clothes for gym and fold them carefully and place them in their class chair. Somehow this behaviour does not translate to our home.

Spot my DS2 won't stay either so we close the door on him (literally, remember the squished pinky incident). However, we have stopped putting him in our room as it is now upstairs and the spare room is now a playroom so defeats the purpose of being punishment. So now we put him in the corridor which has the advantage of having a class door so he can see what we are doing in the livingroom. The funny thing is it also has a doorway into the kitchen which can't be closed so he can escape but he either doesn't seem to know he can or just stays put anyway.

We just met with our real estate agent.dude and after a long chat with different options we have decided to have 2nd viewings of 3 properties with the view to offering on the preferred option.

Hello all,

trace Please don't feel bad. It could have happened to any of us several times over. I really shouted at DD yesterday because she put her hand in the hinge of the door and I almost closed it on her. It was my fault but I was so shocked with what could have happened.

LadyT We have similar discussions/differences of opinion about bath/bedtime. DH likes to come in and get changed, check emails etc whilst I run about like a scolded cat. I'm of the opinion that whether we are talking about work out of the home or looking after DCs, both parents are doing a full days work and it is only fair that both muck in during the WORST time of day.

spot So glad to hear that T is in nursery today so you can both get some rest. Do not change out of your PJs all day.

More to say but must get back to work. Back later.

Bit of a long shot here but my cricket team are going on a tour of Malaysia this Thursday, 4th, until 14th Nov. We have had a last minute drop out and so does any of you know someone who would like to step in? Hotels are paid for so just a case of finding flight money (£550 with Air Asia) and spenders. No flights on 4th available but 3rd and 5th still ok...Average ability/very rusty cricketers are fine...

Heck, I wish I could go but a) it's impossible and b) we need a player.

What about WGs DH?

My DP would love it but I'm afraid I couldn't possibly mention it to him as I need him here! Sorry . Will ask him if he knows of anyone though...

I thought of him but I think he is busy with work...

I have a friend back home who would be perfect (not like the nasty Aussie you had) but he's in Australia and runs his own business so unlikely to be able to go.

Oh Spot, I know you need him, I wouldn't poach your DP.

Thanks Veggie. I should just add that the fella in the book was the only evil Aussie we have ever had. All the others have been gems. In fact, one of my fave Aussies in the world is already going on the trip. I think we will lose him to the homeland eventually though Same with our South Africans. The ones I love the best always end up going home.

I have killed the thread with my cricket talk

oh, lady lady lady, were we living in a parallel universe where i weren't preggers, madam did not yet exist, dh wasn't working on some stuff, he would LOVE it. and i would come along too, and i think i might have died and gone to heaven. but alas...

i am just about coming out of what was probably a norovirus vomtastic 18 hours of rubbishness. luckily dad's ladyfriend came and collected madam and has taken her away so i can puke as much as i like on my own. this poor baby inside me - it's been scrunched and squeezed countless times with the heaving of the vomming, and then i have barely eaten anything so is being denied nutrients. it must be going wtf are you doing to me??? dh is in cardiff writing a welsh rugby talkshow with jonathan davies (aside from being worried about me and missing madam, he is happy as a pig in proverbial)

and i have a night in without madam, without dh (however, with a lovely friend who came over to look after me, feed me a cup of bouillon and watch the last 2 eps of single father with me - yum)

can i ask ppl's opinions? dad and ladyfriend know when my due date is - 22 feb - and have booked to go to portugal for 2 weeks on the 28th feb. am i being unreasonable to feel really upset that they think this is appropriate behaviour? i thought they might stay around to help out with madam when number 2 arrives. they are not being unthoughtful - it was a considered decision. i mentioned that they might want to go in early feb, but ladyfriend said "what happens if you're early - i think you're going to be early". wtf???

Apart from bring ill timed for the babies arrival, why on earth would they want to go to Portugal in.February, and for 2 weeks! I spent 3 weeks there in summer and got bored.

vg - they've got a house there and love it any time of year. but they want to go out and sort out car tax, insurance, building projects etc.

Oh ok I see. Is there a time limit to the car tax thing, maybe they could go a month or two later and take you too!

Oh ok I see. Is there a time limit to the car tax thing, maybe they could go a month or two later and take you too!

Oops! I'm supposed to be going to a Melbourne cup day thing at a friends house, I've made a Spanish tortilla for it and all. But DS2 was up between 3-6am and as well as tired I'm feeling a bit iffy in the tummy. Also DS2 is bizarrely quite high spirited and its quite a posh do. Two Baronesses are going to be there and I can just see DS2 sending champagne flying.

probably a time limit for the car tax, but they've got people who could sort that for them - they've done it before. they are going a month or two later as well and i'll go with, most likely. honestly, i'm wracking my brains as to why they think this is a great time to go, but i do know i am an only child and have a tendency to think the world should revolve around me, so am holding back on complaining.

Hey all - WG - I'd feel just as incensed - can you ask them to go another time??!

Sorry have been AWOL since race - went down to my parents' the next morning. Have had a bit of a disaster in our rented house - the radiator in DD2's room burst on Friday v early and the whole room is soaked through. It has come down to the ground floor too. Thank God we were going away for the weekend! Guys came to sort it out, but they put the wet carpet onto our spare double bed, which is soaked through now too. Most annoying. Plus some of our electrics are now knackered. We've got DD2 in our room with us for the forseeable. Which is ok, but I find I lie awake listening to her doing her funny kicking thing all the time!

DD1 has flu, so isn't at nursery today. Poor little thing. She looks terrible and has gone for her 2nd sleep of the day without a fight!

The run went really well. I was trying to get under 35 mins and got 32mins and 7 secs. V proud of myself! It was such fun and I am keen to do more running!

Am out for dinner with a friend tonight, although it slightly depends on DD1's state as she only wants Mummy.

So sorry not to do personals - have so much to catch up on I don't know where to start! Although will say, Trace - don't beat yourself up about the arm - honestly, these things to happen and often! My sister's little boy has broken both arms in the last year and one of my friends' husbands was playing row row row your boat with his daughter and dislocated her shoulder!

Beans: that is a massive pain, is the landlord sorting everything without any fuss?

That is brilliant about the run, Beans. Really well done.

I guess I have a different perspective to others on your Dad/Lf going to Portugal, our WG, but I may well be a lone voice. After both my kids were born the only help I expected/wanted was DP. I guess it's all according to what you are used to. I don't ask Mum for anything like that as I don't want her wearing herself out. (Not being a martyr there, honest). And MIL offered, which was terribly kind, but I couldn't think of anything worse Can your DH take time off, by the way? If he can't, you will need someone, of course.

Hope you get to go to your do, Veggie, it sounds nice!

On the other hand I am probably not a shining example. I am terrible at accepting help. It causes me considerable anxiety.

Ahh beans Poor DD1, hope shes better soon. WEll done on teh race too thats a fab time! Shame about the burst pipe though. Hope its all sorted soon with minimum disruption. Our ceiling collapsed last year from a leaky pipe - bloody nightmare!

wg I can see why you would be unhappy they've done this. My mum was due to go to teh Gambia when I got pg with DS. Dad thought they should still go (they didn't) but I was horrified he even thought it. I don't suppose they assume that your DH will be around do they? If he is then maybe it'll give you an extra pair of hands when they return and DP is back at work. I don't think they will have meant to be thoughtless, perhaps they think you might just want it to be you 4? Or maybe ladyfriend really is able to predict the future and you will deliver early. Can you chat to your dad about it and tell him how you feel?

Still feeling rotten - not quite got anything just feel like I am about to come down with something but this is my 3rd day feeling like this

WG I'd just explain how you feel, as DB says they might presume you don't want them around in the early days. In contrast to ladyT I want as many people around as possible when DC2 arrives to help entertain DD, cook me meals etc! Say something now though so they can change their plans.

beans I'd complain bitterly about your bed. What a stupid thing to do! Hope DD1 feels better soon.

ladyT I dare not even mention your cricketing offer to DH, he'd have his bags packed before I'd finished speaking.

I had the oddest dream last night. Disclaimer: I do NOT fancy Ed Milliband! So there I was pregnant by Ed Milliband . I was then in bed with him attempting to get fruity - he was very laid back, when he suggested we use a condom. I said it was rather like closing the stable door after the horse has bolted and he replied 'I don't want to get a sexually transmitted disease'. . Not the best sexy dream I've ever had!