September 2010 - we've met our little ones now!

[comixminx]

Or most of them at least - there are some late September ones still to come!

Sassy my dad was also of the "no good" variety, and i realised this in my teens and haven't really bothered with him ever since so as you say your DD will eventually make her own mind up about him.

Well i too have had a shit day, started off so well, Grace was lovely all morning my mum came round and we decided to nip to mothercare for a new bouncy chair as the (expensive) one we have is usless and broke last night. My mum even offered to buy it which is nice. So out came the dreaded car seat and true to form grace went berserk. I thought we were doing really well as she fell asleep in the car but as soon as we got there she started screaming and wouldn't settle.

So we got back home and Grace was way over tired and hungry but wouldn't take her bottle cause she was tired and wouldn't go to sleep cause she was hungry. I spent the next hour and a half pacing/rocking/bouncing/patting/pushing in the pram/extractor fan on etc etc all the while getting more and more wound up and snapping at my mum everytime she offered to help, slammed the phone down on DP when he dared to ring while i was trying to get her to sleep.

In the end my mum went cause she could tell her being here was winding me up even more and as soon as she went Grace calmly curled up in her bouncy chair and went straight to sleep!

So now i feel bad on my mum, bad that i slammed the phone down and a complete fool for getting so wound up!

Roll on 16.30 when DP gets home and i shall go straight out and get wine and chocolate, not needed a drink this much for ages!!

No it didn't come across that way, just wanted you to know in case your DH ex was denying him access. School run beckons and both Jacob and Isobel have been screaming for last 30 mins.....don't know what the bloody hell is wrong. :(

Wow... a day and I've missed so much. sassy I too am sorry about the bumhole of an ex you're dealing with. Can't you make the navy take a special fishing trip in a big, monster boat and have him slung across an ocean or something? Oooooo... or can current dp drive a submarine? Drive? Steer????
Had a hectic day trying to deliver jewellery to shops with Jackington in tow. Finally got myself fed and watered at 2pm so am now plonked on the sofa in my dressing gown with a little man snoaring on me. Might very well take myself to the retail park tonight if I can find some energy.
Still thinking...... drive Is my guess!

8 weeks 4 days, 13lbs ish and about 75ft long!

Initially she allowed him access at her house but then sent dss to his room so mummy and daddy could talk . Was sorted through solicitors but without the need for court and is pretty settled now, thankfully!

Maybe Grace, Isobel and Jacob know something we don't as they are all screaming for seemingly no reason!

My guess would be pilot beaditAli?

All minded kids gone, dh and dss should be home in next 10 mins. The weekend starts here! Off to get the boys feet cast tomorrow for Christmas pressies

Oh... so much for clock watching. DH working really late and has to go in tomorrow Always after the hardest days And he's said he doesn't think he should sleep in our room as he's getting a cold. Do babies catch colds from us really easily? And what do any of you use to prevent/soothe?
Hayho...
Chinese on it's way and vino in the fridge. You enjoying yours yet newmun?

saoirse86. Lovely to hear you are doing well. How did you find the care at BWH? I had an awful labour but found the staff and quality of care excellent. The bad days are becoming less & less now Harlyn is getting older but in the first two weeks I struggled with BF, then when that became more established the reflux came. But I wouldn't change a thing and just love him so much.

As for routines, I tried bathing him earlier this evening (7pm rather than 9:30-10), gave him a big feed and put him in his moses basket (which I think he may be too big for now). He spent the next hour gurgling, kicking & punching air but refused to drop off to sleep for a nap. He has only cat napped today so I know he is tired. DH has now taken him upstairs to try and get him off to sleep but I can hear him crying as I type so if anyone has any tried and tested strategies that help with getting baby off for a nap then please share.

I had a lovely hour at the gym but it was totally spoilt by me getting back only to find DH hadn't come home yet with the LO. His appointment was a 12 and this was 1:30. His phone was ringing out and he hadn't called me to say he had gone anywhere else. LO was due a feed and DH hadn't even taken the change bag or a bottle. I was becoming frantic thinking that something bad had happened. Eventually at 2:30 he called to say he was on his way home. He ended up having an osteopathy session too to sort out his back. I started crying when I knew they were safe. Never been so scared. It was the worst hour of my life imagining all sorts of awful things.

Thanks everyone! You're all so lovely! I'd be stuffed without you but I would like to point out that you've all just made me cry again! by being too nice!

Saoirse Thats the problem, Shes fantastic with the boys. she & her dh are their godparents & absolutely adore them. Thats why its so hard that she's being funny with me!

So I took the time out advice a bit literally & after having a word with dh, telling him how I felt, he ignored it so I shouted him while the dcs were both in the bath, asked him to watch them for a minute & went out! Drove up the road & back again for an hour then went & had a massive rant to a friend & came home again! I think he believes that I'm struggling now!!! We've cancelled our weekend away & are just going to chill! and my Mum si hopefull having them both next friday night!

Sassy Thats rubbish about your ex. I hope you get it sorted.

Ill be back to my usual being a mum of two is so easy! tomorrow!

Jodey - hope you are over your scare.
Clumsy- youd never know! I trained in Britain so if this ship keeps sinking I may be heading over!
Banana - Im a bit of a nut when it comes to the housework etc. I find it very hard to relax if the place is a mess. It just really bugs me and adds to my feeling overwhelmed. People give out to me but somethings you can let go of and forget and other things are part of who you are and cant be so easily changed. If you are like me either pay for a cleaner (consider it sanity pay) or have someone mind children for even two hours so you can get things done. I also get very lonely here but if you can find even one other mum to have coffee with it would really help. Im sorry about your friend. I lost a very good friend for the same reasons when I was expecting DS1. You cant control how she feels but you can draw the line at how you will be treated. I understoon where my friend was coming from and felt for her. But I had a child and nothing could be done about that - she decided she couldnt deal with it and I didnt want to be treated nastily so end of. Finally I have discovered that if you can ask for help or express your feelings without crying people dont immediately jump on the depression band wagon. This is why I generally discuss these matters over a nice meal out with my DH. I wont cry or go blub in a public place and when I stay calm he really takes it on board. And I get a lovely meal and dessert as a reward for keeping the waterworks undercontrol. (I also cry when Im angry - I can see sometimes how he would think it was all hormones!)
Phoebe has taken to 'nibbling' at night. She wakes up, feeds for 10 mins and then nods off. Driving me nuts as am awake almost every hour from 3 or 4 on. Im shattered as boys get up then around 7.

Morning. Your both wrong beaditali and cinnamon. I've been reliably informed it's steer. :)

Hi jodey I have been thinking about you the last few days. How's it going with the food diary?

Hope you are feeling better banana?

Dp had to be at the house today for 8am to let the electrician and the plumber in to do their 2nd fixes.....Woohoo to the fixes, boo to yet another weekend where we hardly see DP.

Gawd love a duck etc..haven't caught up on the entire thread, but everyone seems to be having ups and downs and round and rounds..

I have been looking in from time to time but too knackered to post! My little fella is a bloody cat napper: sleeping in very occasional 30 minute bursts. Not great. But sleeps well at night: mainly because by then am comatose.

Frantically packing as moving in 10 days. I say packing, am lucky if I get a box a day done, between feeding, jiggling and fending off/sorting the other three little people.

This is the 3rd time in 3 years we have moved now and it does NOT get any better! My sanity is most certainly compromised now!!

Empathising with everyone going through a dip: it is no picnic having a newborn, but I would not change it for anything: which is presumably why I ended up with four..

Cannot wait til the move is over: I am literally throwing anything that I don't consider necessary to our existence in a box and trying so hard to not pack the kids and see them when we have moved.
I am very lucky having 2 relatively older ones who are (between fighting) so helpful with the younger two. My eldest in particular is great at getting baby to sleep: the only thing she can't do is breastfeed! I am like a feeding and packing machine: perhaps I should set up a business catering in this?!

Little fella 9 weeks today and smiley and giggly and gorgeous. Just won't bloody sleep longer than half an hour!
Catbus is officially HANGING but lovin it..

bananastew sorry your feeling down I know at times everything seems so difficult. When Maria-Ann was born over 8 wks ago the first couple of wks I found very difficult trying to adjust to a new baby and trying to cope with my 7 year old being so demanding. It does get better and you will probable still have some days when you feel like this.I still have days like this now. I have loads of things going on in my personal life too and sometimes find it difficult and feel like its all getting on top of me. I did explain to my O/H how I was feeling and finally built up the courage to see my GP who prescribed me anti-depressants, I knew in my heart this is what I needed as I was suffering from PND. I knew all the symptoms as with my first I suffered really bad. Felt really crap that I managed to get PND again and felt like a failure as a parent. I know I did the right thing as I do feel much better in my self. Hope you start to feel better soon :)

Maria-Ann 8wks +4days weighing 10lbs
My internet as been down for days as the transformer is broke would have to wait 5 working days for a new one, anyway my friend has borrowed me hers.

Last night was a really tough night, Maria-Ann was off colour thinks it's the injections she had. She was awake from 12am till 4am and nothing I did could settle her. Didn't want to wake my O/H so just crept down stairs and stayed ther till 4am when my O/H woke up and took over. I'm really hopeing that she sleeps better tonight as I'm so tired. Today as been quite difficult as she will work herself up and scream the place down. Went into town the other day with my fiend she had her baby 5 wks after me was really nice catching up. I forgot how difficult it is actually getting out of the house with all the baby stuff

Watersprite You didn't "get" PND, Its one of those things that "gets" you and once you've had it its pretty inevitable that it'll happen again. I know I haven't got that. I did exactly the same with ds1. Got to 11/12 weeks, had a meltdown felt all sorry for myself, stopped pressurising myself so much, slowed down & sorted myself out!

MammyG you sound very much like me. once I came home last night & talked to dh without crying or sounding like I was blaming him, we've both decided we need to slow down. We're having the whole house re carpeted on the 30th so he's frantically trying to decorate, leaving me to deal with the boys. We're both putting too much pressure on ourselves and eachother.

We've had a lovely day today. Dh and ds1 fell asleep on the settee giving me an hour to just play with Oliver then he fell asleep on me. We've had a nothing day and once they're in bed we'll be ordering the chinese & opening the vino!

Hope everyone else is having a good weekend, watersprite hope you have a better night.

oops!

Oliver 11wks 5days

beaditAli they do catch colds easily as they don't have very good immune systems. Not a lot you can do, I used saline nasal drops for ds1 to help with feeding and snufflebabe rubbed on his chest. Luke has a cold at the moment and he's quite snuffly, snoring lots and feeding more at night but ok otherwise.

Glad you're feeling better bananastew and that you have got some help watersprite, it's not your fault you've got PND again, at least this time you've recognised it early and are feeling more yourself.

Had a lovely day yesterday, went to have the boys feet cast for Christmas pressie and both were very good. Then did a bit of Christmas shopping, got myself some new boots from my dad. Came home and had a chilled out afternoon at home, ds1 has discovered dh's chess set so we played something the vaguely resembled chess!! Luke is happily awake for longer now and is really enjoying the teddies on his bouncy chair which is lovely to watch.

Beautiful morning here at the moment and managed to go back to bed after Luke woke up at 6 so feeling refreshed :)

9+6

Glad you talked it through bananastew. Had big talk with DP myself last night. He has been acting so different lately. He admitted last night that he is tired, miserable and running on empty. He said that if he thought he could sell the house and break even, then he would. He said he has lost all interest in it and doesn't even want to live there.
A major shock for me. I've never seen him like that. He is a massively strong person (scarily so) and i've never seen him show any signs of vulnerability. My heart hurt for him. Instead of trying to foist the babies on him, i'm like, i'll do it, i'll get it. It was like i didn't recognise him and it scared me.

We are so close to getting in. I can't help because of the babies, but i think if i don't it will drag on and effect him even more. Seriously considering giving them formula every afternoon 5pm onwards (mum will babysit) while i go to the house and finish all the painting. Hopefully they will only need one feed before i get back. What does everyone think?

sassy34264 I'm so sorry your do feels like that especially as it's so out of character. Personally I wouldn't give formula but then breastfeeding is very important to me due to trying to avoid dh's allergies in the boys but in the grand scheme of things it won't do any harm. Have you tried expressing or did you not manage to get your hands on a pump? Could your mum come with you to the house and then you can feed them when needed and if they were quiet your mum could lend a hand too? Shouldn't affect your milk supply if you do go for formula and I you find it doesn't work out after a few days you can always rethink things. Hope things improve for you both and you get in the house very soon! I have a friend who was doing her house up but living in it at the same time. Huge extension and re wiring and plastering the rest, went over so finished when her dd was 4 months. Then had pipe leak which wrecked a large part of extension. They had a builder but her dh was labouring and decorating so had to do it all again and was totally fed up with it all, was a tough time for them both but they now have a beautiful home! Focus on the end result if you can :)

Hi Ladies :)
Bananastew glad to hear you are feeling much better.

cinnamongreyhound I do feel more like myself now that I got the help I needed and it also helped talking it threw mith my O/H I'm also glad I reconised the signs much ealier this time.

Maria-Ann had her last feed at 9.30pm but stayed awake till gone 1am, then she woke up at 3am for her feed. Wished I could get her into a routine but I really think these injections are affecting her now. My O/H got up at 4am and took her down stairs so I could get some sleep.

Just wondering when you ladies were thinking of putting your little one's in the cot, Maria-Ann sleeps in her moses basket in the cot but recently she has been thrashing her arms about quite a lot which wakes her up. She sleeps in a grow bag, I've tried swaddaling her but she is so strong she manages to break free.

also wondering if it's normal to to be still bleeding, some times it's quite heavy. Just seem to have between 2-4days break then I'm on again :( Really can't remember what is the norm as my daughter is 7 and it seems such a long time ago.

Maria-Ann 8wks +5days

Cinnamon It has no radiators, so it's freezing and the electrics only went on yesterday. No, not got my hands on a pump. I can't get my head around the idea. Just think i spend enough time breast feeding without sitting there and pumping for two as well! I already have no life!
I am already beginning to think more selfishly, cue huge guilt, but i miss training. I've not been to my club for nearly a year now. I miss everyone and my body has been stuck in this position now since babies were about 2 weeks old. I love my babies but i'm not someone who lives through my kids. I have a life too and i'm beginning to want it back. Just a little, i know i can't train 6-8 times a week like before, but a few times a week would help my sanity i think. Not to mention my self esteem. (I'm still wearing big knickers ((or Nelsons sails, as DP calls them)) cos my normal ones roll down due to my jelly belly and sit on my c section scar)
Just reading this makes me feel crap and selfish but i'm going stir crazy in this house day after day. Most days you are the only adults i talk to!

watersprite I bypassed the moses baskets and put mine in the cot from day 1.

Sorry, forgot to add that i think you are only supposed to swaddle for 1 month. I presume it's a trade off between making them feel secure and allowing them to develop ( hand to eye co-ordination etc)

Hi all, just trying to catch up. Been away for the weekend to visit relatives with my mum and just got back.

Had a nice weekend, Oliver was very weel behaved considering he was passed about from pillar to post. He also slept well in what was a strange bedroom for him!

Weird for me though - being away from DH in the night for the first time since baba was born!

sassy - I think that sounds like a good idea about helping out with the painting if you feel up to it. And I second you on the excercise thing. I am going to start walking every day again this week and hopefully get back to swimming a couple of times week soon.

On that note - has anyone been swimming with the LO yet? We want to go soon but not sure when we can go?

Watersprite - mine stopped after 2 weeks so sorry I don't know? Maybe somone else can advise? If not - just give your HV or doctor a call?

Olly - 8 weeks today.

Sounds like you've already made a decision sassy34264!!! It's not selfish at all, you will be a better mum if you happy and also to your dd1 if you are showing her how to feel good about yourself. Everyone is different and there is nothing wrong with wanting something for yourself. Try them with formula while you're decorating and then you will know they are for when you start training again :)

We took ds1 when he was 5 weeks chelle1986 but haven't got around to taking Luke yet. 3 children and 2 adults makes it mote tricky, especially when one is a tiny baby an needs total attention from one of us!

Sassy Only you know whats best for you and your babies but a happy mum makes happy babies and you're not talking about stopping completely, just one feed.
You made a good point about your dps feelings. Through me walking out and the subsequent discussion dh sensitively pointed out that I'm not the only one struggling. He works a lot of overtime to enable me to take the full year off & is also decorating the whole house. They're also trying to adapt to the new situation and feeling lots of pressure.

Chelle You can take them when you like. A lot of people wait till after their 1st jabs but they're no more likely to catch the illnesses they're being vaccinated against in a pool as they are in a shop!