AUGUST 2010 - welcome to post-natal :o)

[CherryPie3]

I know I'm not around a great deal lately but we don't yet have a PN thread - so here we are.

Love to all xxx

:)

Thanks for the quick responses.

I usually keep expressing until there is nothing left so im unsure how to increase the amount each day - maybe if i pump for a few mins at the end of each session (with no milk coming out) it will help supply?

I am completely clueless with regards to BF counsellors etc. how do i arrange to see one? do i contact my health visitor?

hi littlemiss i m having the same prob with ds. its day 10 in the big brother house and ds wont stop feeding! he gets very windy and grunty so trying to wind him in between alice. he doesnt like to be put down and even when you think he s asleep he still wants to feed!

anyone out there expressing? what pump re you using? thinking of expressing and freezing. bit paranoid about supply and it should help. also i think left boob prduces more than right even though i alternatehen feeding is that normal?

hope everyone s okay and there aren't too many on the night shift :)

Hi chick, ive been using the avent manual pump and find it ok - time consuming but ok. i too find that one boob produces more than the other even though i alternate.

Has anyone tried an electric pump? just wondering if they are better / worth the money?

chickie - i'm using tommee tippee everything lol - bottles, microwave steriliser and manual pump. very happy with it, and its usually half price in tesco or asda.

alice - good tip, will def try winding him, i'm sure he does gulp down loads of air, he always acts like he's half starved even if it's only been an hour or two since his last feed!

tah - i think you can hire electric pumps from places like the NCT so you can try them out first without spending a fortune. Or i think Tiny Life hire the hospital grade pumps out for a couple of weeks for free...

i've been mixed feeding since about day 5 and DS has never shown any confusion between bottle and breast, he takes either happily and he doesn't care whether the bottle is warm or room temperature. as long as he's getting fed lol typical man! midwife warned me that if you want to mix feed, the longer you leave it the more you risk LO refusing to take a bottle since they've gotten so used to the breast!

I've been expressing for last 3 days, just 5 minutes on each side is enough to do a bottle which is great. so i'm giving DS an expressed bottle around 7ish, breastfeed about 9 and then DH does a formula feed about 11 and then DS is lights out til about 3am, which is great!

nipples are sore tho...lansinoh helps but skin is still a bit cracked and first 15 seconds of a feed seem to go by very slowly

tah you could ask your midwife/HV about breastfeeding counsellors or if there are any breastfeeding cafes or support groups near you. Also try calling the NCT breastfeeding helpline or La Leche League.

tah, will your LO latch on now you're less engorged? The best way to increase supply is to feed . Well done for expressing so far, it must be tough with no support. Google 'the breastfeeding network' or 'la leche league' to find a BFing counsellor.

Football was great! D slept pretty much the whole time, had to feed him midway through first half tho but dont think anyone noticed.

neenz, yes LO will latch on now i am less engorged but is a bit fussy. I havent fed her much myself because i think she wont get enough from me to be satisfied. However i did BF her for about an hour today and she seemed satisfied for about an hour afterwards, so there may be hope yet!

Thanks for suggesting some good places to seek advice. I will definately look up the sites suggested and maybe even build up the confidence to phone one of the helplines.

I have found the Breastfeeding Network to be really good

neenz - DH's work colleagues got us a baby bjorn but i haven't had much luck getting DS to settle in it. he's only 15 days old so maybe h's a bit young? but he is 9lb 6oz so i think he's def big enough... i'm jealous of you being able to bf hands free and go to football matches!! our buggy is great, really light weight and easy to push about but it'd be so handy to stick him in the baby bjorn to pop round to the shops - when could you get your LO to settle in it? any tips??

Tah, that's great news that she can latch on now. Just keep feeding as often as you can and use as little formula as poss because if her tummy is full of formula she won't have the urge to suck. So just feed feed feed as much as you can. She may need feeding every 30-60mins sometimes but that is normal anyway - my DS does that even now! You can definitely make enough milk to satisfy her but you have to let her suck so she can let your body know how much she needs! When I BF'd the twins I often felt I didn't have any milk esp late in the day, but I just latched them on every time they cried and thought 'I might not have enough milk today but letting them suck means I will have enough tomorrow' HTH

Blueberries, I didn't see the BFing twins thread till today but she got some good advice anyway!

Littlemiss, D seemed to like the Baby Bjorn straight away (tried it first when he was about 8lb which was 3wks-ish). Your DS could be too young, or could he have been hungry when you tried? I found it good at those times when I felt that he was tired but just couldn't drop off. I wasn't hands free when I was feeding - I had to take him out of the Baby bjorn to feed him!

Anna, good luck at the match! We had such a great time, I was so proud to take him. We got lots of lovely comments eg 'get them when they're young' and 'that's the youngest baby I've ever seen at a game'. Lots of sideways glances too as we were walking round before the game and at ht - I think we did look a bit strange!

Fuck! Now i could cry!!!!

Just typed out a bit of a moan, then lost the bloody post! I don't have time to repost, i want to sleep

Anyway, periods have returned, F is ebf and not even 4wks old yet. It has completely floored me.

Trying him in a grobag thing tonight.

night

tah, my 5 week old will still sometimes feed for an hour and then want feeding again an hour later! I think breastfeeding is a bit different to using a bottle as the baby can choose to take less milk and suck for comfort and cuddles, whereas the flow of milk from the bottle is more constant. So a long breastfeeding session isn't just about getting milk for the baby, she might just be enjoying being close and comfy with you. It doesn't necessarily mean she's not getting enough from you.

there, there little one...

DH decided as he's now starting his week off, he'd take A in beside him to sleep for a few hours to give me a minibreak & then bring him through for feeding. It lasted 6 minutes, including the time it took A to work himself up to defcom 4. It's the thought that counts...

Night, y'all. Hope it's a relatively peaceful one all round.

alice - are you sure? not a bit of extra bleeding posy birth.... sorry that is a bit of a stupid post .... hugs hugs and more hugs.

Hey, i'm not sure, but the same thing happened with DD at 5wks, then exactly 26days later and so on. Was expressing with her so not huge surprise i suppose, but i am only BF and constantly so thought it might take longer this time. It has been the hormones that have done me in tbh, i have been pretty much on an even keel, but yesterday i felt like crying my eyes out all day and again this morning (it is all going wrong this morning) Plus it is new blood, bright red, completely different to the lochia.

Sorry for the misery, on a positive note, F was more settled in his grobag last night, he had obviously been a bit chilly.

oh alice - big hugs sweetie, that's rubbish!

weehector every evening I wait til G is sound asleep then gently pass him to dh for some cuddles...4 minutes is the longest he's stayed asleep on dh. Poor dh, he just wants cuddles with his boy and to give me a break!

need to have a bit of a moan girls, sorry. so skip the next part if you fancy.

We decided last December that we'd spend this christmas just the 4 of us, in our own house (we live south-east London and family are all north-east scotland). we agreed that it was time to start having our own family traditions (poor deprived ds1 has never had his own christmas tree to decorate - grandparents either do it all before we arrive or are too fussy to let him help)

except now dh has decided we should really go up. we've been looking at buying a new car so he reckons we should drive up!!!! All well and good except he doesn't bloody drive!!!!!!! I could swing for him, I really could. nearly posted a thread about it in aibu but i'm too scared!

I would post in AIBU tbh, lots of people are likely to be on your side, then you can show it to him I for one would put my foot down. If he was willing to drive then fair enough. If you are BF during the night, chances are you are not going to be safe to drive that sort of distance on the tiny small amount of sleep you are getting.

blueberries - that's totally one for AIBU!! we live 5 mins drive from both sets of parents and i'm still going to insist we're back in our own house by abot 5ish on xmas day so i can really veg out and relax. it's supposed to be a holiday for you too, not an epic 10 hour drive in bad weather with kids in the back!!

alice - AF back already? nightmare! hope you're taking iron tablets - i'm sure it's the last thing you feel like you need right now...

DS is 16 days now and although he's always been a bit fussy and whingy in the evenings he's usually a pretty good sleeper at night. well, no more!! he completely refused to go down in his basket last night even though he was extremely well fed, winded, changed etc, room was v quiet and i was in bed right beside the basket. ended up having to tell DH to sleep in spare room cos he's back at fulltime teaching this week and i got too stressed trying to keep Dara quiet so he could get some sleep. in the end, the little monkey would only sleep when he was in bed beside me

i'm v nervous about co-sleeping cos of potential risks to Dara and i really only feel comfortable doing it if there's only me in the bed with him but i don't want to be kicking DH out to spare room on a permanent basis cos im pretty sure separate bedrooms isn't great for your marriage!! anyone got any co-sleeping tips? or in a similar situation? dreading trying to get him down for the night already and it's still the morning

neenz thanks for the support, i definately feel better about what i am doing. I am going to try to feed feed feed as much as possible and if she gets really distressed i will give her ebm/ff but try to express afterwards. Hopefully that will work

moon im glad u pointed out that LO could be sucking for comfort not just to be fed otherwise i would be thinking why hasnt she had enough?

blueberries i agree with the other ladies im afraid - definately one for aibu. After spending the first two xmas trying to visit family we decided to stay at home and have our own xmas and it was definately better for the kids - they got to play with their toys. Afterall xmas is all about the kids in my opinion (hope tha doesnt sound pushy).

littlemiss i hav always ended up co sleeping as it seems to be the only way any of us can get any sleep. Neither DH or i smoke / drink etc and are always careful to give her loads of space. I think u can google safe cosleeping positions.

I phoned the breastfeeding network yesturday but had to go out by the time they phoned back, so will try again later (if i get the chance!)
Have a good day everyone!

littlemiss I have the same problem with co sleeping that I don't feel there's room for all 3 of us in the bed so DH has been sleeping in the spare room. I wasn't planning on co sleeping but ds always wakes up and won't easily settle if i put him back in his basket after a feed.
We're trying to make it work by having a cuddle together in bed (just me and dh) before the last feed then dh goes to spare bed so we don't lose the closeness. Also thinking we'll try not to co sleep for too long, maybe stop when ds only needs one feed per night (I hope that's not too far in the distant future!)

Poor you alice, I can't face the thought of periods again after 9 months off. I'm getting pretty fed up with this lochia!

tah I had supply issues at first as i bottle fed for a few days. Mw told me to express for a bit after each feed - even if you don't get much/anything off, the stimulation should help build up your supply. Hope things work out :)

Quick update on me and Joel. He is now exclusively bf, woohoo! Need to be brave and try and do it without nipple shields though. Don't feel i can bf in public until we've mastered that. The amount he sleeps per day seems to vary so much. Yesterday he hardly slept at all, then we had a pretty good night but today he has slept most of the morning (very nice for me but now I'm getting nervous that he's storing up trouble for later). Do you wake your babies if you think they're sleeping too much in the day? He's still only 2 weeks old so I haven't started thinking about trying to implement a routine yet.

blueberries if you're the one driving, you get to make the decisions. And I think with 2 children it's deffo time to start making your own family traditions!

alice sorry :( that's crap, I would hate to get mine so quick.

weehector lol! the exact same thing happens with us :) sometimes DH takes a bottle of expressed milk and he only lasts as long as the bottle does and then Sam's back with me...so frustrating for all of us!

littlemiss Sam isn't settling in his basket at the mo either. I find if I tuck myself in and put him wrapped up on top of my duvet with his head on my outstretched arm iyswim. I sort of cuddle him but then I know I'm not going to roll over on top of him cos my arm's there and I can hear/feel him breathing and my boob's right smack bang in front of his mouth if he gets peckish.

marzipan well done you! :) hooray for exclusive bf At that age ime it makes no difference whether they sleep a lot or a little, the nights are equally crap just as broken.

Well, after another night of not much sleep I was hoping for a nap, Sam's down at last but for some reason DD isn't - usually she's the more reliable of the two...typical!

Alice, that sucks about your period and mood swings. Hope you feel better today. Being warmer in Grobag definitely helps Daniel sleep better.

Tah, glad things are going so well. It's fab that you are giving it a real go. Ask here anytime for advice!

Blueberries, no need for a AIBU thread cos YADNBU! Once you have kids it is lovely to start your own traditions at home. You can go visit family another time. Esp if you are expected to do all the driving. Why doesn't DH drive?

Littlemiss, Daniel is the same - he doesn't settle well unless he is in bed with me, so we just go with it. Just keep duvets and pillows away from Dara and position yourself so that your leg and arm are out in front of you so you can't roll onto her. I put Daniel about a foot in from the edge of the bed and then sleep between him and DH. I get him to sleep in his own cot during the day - when he sems tired I just close all the curtains make it as dark as poss, maybe give him a feed to settle him and put him in the cot. He sometimes has a cry for 10 mins but then falls asleep. It's much easier in the day to let them self-settle cos you are not worrying about disturbing DH. I have been sleeping in the spare room some nights, and some nights we all start off in bed together then at the first feed I go to the spare room (cos when I feed on the right breast it would put D in the middle of the bed which I don't want cos he is next to DH then). I do worry that DH will feel abandoned but really it is only for a few weeks, the marriage should survive that . By 3mths I expect to have him sleeping in his own room but until then I can't be bothered to be up in the night trying to settle him. [lazy]

Marzi, well done on EBF. I think at 2wo babies just sleep when they want to sleep. Daniel is 6wks old on Sunday and we still haven't really got much of a routine. He will still fall asleep whenever and wherever and until that stops I am not sure you can have much of a routine cos the baby just ignores wake times anyway if they are tired!

LittleMiss - I've ended up co-sleeping too, even though we bought an expensive bedside cot Apparently that's not close enough for DS and he wants to be right up next to me! Generally DP sleeps on the sofa as DS just seemed so small and fragile at first I wanted to give him as much space as possible, but now he's 6 weeks I feel a lot more confident about all three of us being in bed together. Just make sure it's always you next to the baby not his dad, as mothers have an instinct for where their babies are that dads don't apparently. I place DS so his head is higher than mine on the bed, so I won't pull the duvet up over him.

marzipanimal - I read the No Cry Sleep Solution and it suggested not letting the baby sleep more than two or three hours at a time during the day, so that's what I've done with DS since about 2 weeks. Sometimes he's only awake for 20-30 minutes between naps though! It seems to have worked as he is very rarely awake at night - he has all his awake time during the day and just wakes very briefy for night feeds and then falls asleep again.

Any single mums out there, you have my respect - it's only day 3 without DH and this toddler/newborn malarkey is doing my nut. He's been screaming all day unless he's on me but doesn't want to feed and DD didn't have a nap and is wound up by Sam's constant crying. I'm threaders, Sam's screaming in his basket, Lucy's standing on my feet shouting and I'm about ready to punch something...ARGH!

just added a few pics of Marianne for those who interested !