Let's get down to the base nitty gritty of the election. Shag, marry or cliff? Ed, Dave or Nick?

[MardyBra]

I'm assuming Nigel will just be bruised by barge poles.

Marry Ed
Shag Nick
Throw the face like a newly wanked cock that is Dave off a cliff

Shag Dave
Marry Nick
Cliff Ed

Shag Ed if Chuka can join too
Marry and shag Nick
Dave- the cliff

Daryl, you would cope with life as Ed's wife because he would do whatever you said. Pushover agogo.

They are all tall, aren't they? No hope for the short man politician. Douglas Alexander looked really tiny next to George Osborne after the last TV debates - like a glove puppet.

Anyway, I would:

Shag Nick (a lot)
Marry Dave (is a good father, except wrt to leaving dc in pubs)
Cliff Ed and good riddance

Marry Ed
Shag Cameron
Push Nick

i cant believe people can actually type the words "shag David Cameron" voluntarily

So what we've discovered from this thread that should Nick Clegg ever find himself hard up for some lovin' he only needs to stumble upon a few mumsnetters to get some bedroom action.

Dave and Ed however should be cautious around cliff edges.

Fanjo - i know it's weird.

however, i am very glad to see that it's not just me who thinks Nick is totally shaggable. (i was worried it was one of those very strange crushes like MNers are wont to have - like Mr tumble or something...)

google is a dangerous place...

www.facebook.com/pages/Nick-Clegg-Shut-up-and-take-your-shirt-off/111991302176187

AND Mardy it looks like this has already been done
the libdem voice has a MN poll as a news article from february this year

Fanjo There's just no way I could marry Cameron or Clegg. Unless the marriage involved stabbing them repeatedly with a fork until they died during the wedding night.

That means I can only marry Ed, ergo I can only shag Cameron or Clegg. Nick Clegg has been genetically engineered specifically for me to find him as repulsive and weasely as possible. I think he's a nasty odious power grabbing grubby little man and I'd never ever touch him let alone shag.

I'm left having to shag Cameron, it wouldn't be too bad. I bet his bedsheets are like a trillion thread count or something.

"having to shag cameron, it wouldnt be too bad"?????
NOOOOOO

The alternative would be shagging Clegg, and all the skin would crawl off my body. Nothing is comparatively that bad.

i would jump off the cliff

I have a theory that David Cameron would be a very sweaty lover, with a constant damp film across his brow and arse cheeks, I bet he gets very ruddy face cheeks too whilst dtd.

I think Ed is a thigh rubber, like Vic and Bob on shooting stars.

And now I feel nauseous.

awww epic fail

I am too traumatised to get my brackets right

I'd shag Ed because he looks like he'd be grateful and I think I could make him hang around all of the next day and make me tea and crumpets and do my hoovering. I also think he'd have a big dick.

I'd marry Dave because he looks like he'd be quite good at DIY. He's also desperate to show how much of an involved dad he is so I could palm him off with the kids all of Saturday whilst I do something fun. It would be a no sex marriage, though, and he couldn't talk to me too much in his horrible posh voice.

I'd push Nick off the cliff because he's a smug little worm with annoying hair.

Jumping off your cliff is not the rulez Fanjo

Neither is pushing them all of the cliff, which is the eminently better choice.

Interesting thread! hadn't considered this but... I think shag and marry DC - the others just make me wish I hadn't lifted that stone in the garden today...

Shag Ed once and once only so it was over and done with.
Cameron is going off the cliff with my boot in his behind. In fact, I'd see how far into the sea I could boot him.
Shag Nick.

Poor Nick :( He used to look so boyish and fresh and now he simply looks exhausted and wan. Such is the price of selling your soul to the devil. He needs some sleep, some sunshine and some good home cooked food, and to never touch politics again. After that he might be fit for purpose.

"I'd shag Ed because he looks like he'd be grateful" - ah, the pity factor...

i'm a rule breaker

"shag and marry DC "

it gets worse

Marry Nick

Shag Ed

Cliff Dave

I'm amazed at the people who'd shag Ed! Obviously I'm shallow. What if his cock looks like Dave?