Let's get down to the base nitty gritty of the election. Shag, marry or cliff? Ed, Dave or Nick?

[MardyBra]

I'm assuming Nigel will just be bruised by barge poles.

Round here we play shag, marry, cruise (2 weeks sharing a cabin with bunks).
I'd marry Nick because he seems the nicest, shag Ed because he's less good looking but ok. So I'd go on a cruise with Dave because he'd be able to get us a seat at the captains table with all his connections and I wouldn't have to touch him.

Marry them all then swan off to work. As 'brother husbands' they would have to learn to work together properly to actually achieve things.

I would then start having sex with Ed just that bit more often than the others, causing a huge bustup between them. Ed would have a surge of self confidence and would be voted in, Dave would realise he didn't need all this crap and would retire to be PR manager for a polo team, and Nick would decide he preferred life as a SAHD.

"I don't think Nigel would be capable of shagging anyone. He always looks like he's had a couple of pints and I suspect he gets bad brewer's droop."

Apparently he's only 51. I'm no spring chicken but I thought he was way older than me.

51 I'd have said he was much older than that.

Marry: Nick
Shag: Ed
Dave's getting shoved off the cliff. But definitely not the Poldarky ones. They shouldn't be sullied by his presence.

Shag- Dave
Marry- Nick
Cliff-Ed, he's too fucking creepy and looks like a waxwork.

I wouldn't want anything to do with Nigel, yuck.

Really? Oh god. Ok.

Shag - Dave but he would have to wear a bag on his head and it would have to be quick.
Marry - Nick because he would brush up ok. And we know he's obedient.
Cliff - Ed and those freaky eyes.

Nigel is like Toad of Toad Hall and needs to die. He actually looks like he could catch flies with his tongue.

Shag - Nick
Marry - David
Cliff - Wallace, I mean Ed.

Get very very drunk and shag Ed. Marry Nick (sorry Miriam, if you're reading). Dave goes off the cliff.

I think Clegg looks like he'd know his way around, IYSWIM.

Marry Ed, he'd do as he was told.
Cameron - cliff, no question.

Let's broaden this out .... Same question for the 3 main parties finance peeps... So shag/ marry/ drop off a cliff ....
Danny Alexander
Ed Balls
George (Gideon) Osborne!

Let's broaden this out .... Same question for the 3 main parties finance peeps... So shag/ marry/ drop off a cliff ....
Danny Alexander
Ed Balls
George (Gideon) Osborne!

Clegg
Cameron
Ed

I

Shag Clegg, marry Ed, Dave - Beachy Head.

Shag- Ed I couldn't with the other two no way, no how, never not for a billion pounds and Dave Grohl as my own personal play toy.

I would marry Nick for a billion pounds and Dave Grohl.

I'd push bastard Cameron off the biggest cliff I could fine twice.

Marlin, you are evil! There's no way I could shag any of those three so they would all be going off the cliff!

All three of those would be cliffed, surely?

Danny Alexander has lovely hair, though.
Ed Balls has the look of the schoolboy snitch to him.

I shamefully admit to having a bit of a thing for the boy George, especially since he's been doing the 5:2... So I'd shag him, marry red Ed (he seems to have a bit of a sense of humour buried somewhere in there) and it would be curtains for Danny

Noooo, George is gagworthy. There are those of us not me who'd be sidling up to Alex Salmond if Gideon was the only other option.

Marry Clegg
Stomach churning choice of who to shag but it would have to be Ed aka Plug from the Beano as that would mean I'd get to enjoy shoving Hameron off the cliff

Cliff - Dave! In fact I'd like him to be on a bungee cord so I could do it over and over.
Marry - ed. His posing face during the debates made me laugh. Marriage needs more than just sec right??
Shag - Nick and throw up a lot afterwards. Although if I did it in that order the marriage would be over quickly at least.

All off cliff, though hopefully the tides in and they just get a wee bit wetter than they already are.
Then away to have a cuppa and a nice scone with Nicola Sturgeon

Marry Nick - he seems the popular choice.

Get blind drunk and shag Dave

It's the cliff for Ed. Sorry. Might give him a rope so he can abseil down rather than die. I couldn't marry or shag him because I'm convinced he's an extra from Wallace and Gromit.

Shag - Nick, a proper hate fuck it would be too. I'd make him speak in forrin to me a la Fish Called Wanda

Marry - Ed, a sexless marriage. All that blue balls frustration might drive him to be a contender.

Cliff - the vile Cameron. And I would enjoy it, in fact I'd invite all my friends and family to watch.

okay, this is purely based on politics and the recent and proven history of said politics and nothing at all to do with the fact that i have a secret crush on nick who actually looks really sexy in his new glasses

cliff - dave.
shag - nick - previously would have said marry to him, but he's proven to be unfaithful and flaky, so i wouldn't want to risk marriage on him
marry - ed - he seems like a marriable type.