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Son has called SS on me

227 replies

Itsme20 · 12/10/2026 11:29

I have claimed pip on behalf of my son, we agreed for him to have 45 pounds a week, I was also paying his transport to
college every week out of my own money, he messaged me wanting the full amount of pip, I said no as I thought he would waste the money, he was going in on me calling me names and being horrible; I then agreed the next day he could have it all as I don’t want to fall out with him over money so I thought oh just get on with it! In the meantime he has called SS on me saying I am financially abusing him; I have all the evidence on my phone of me ordering him what he asked for with his money and the rest I transferred him, he also has added onto the report that I emotionally neglect him. And leave him in his room, he is 16 and a half years old; I have messages on my phone repeatedly asking him to do things, I’m really worrying about the visit as I havnt heard a lot of good things regarding social services and frankly I’m so hurt that he has done this to me, I have a one year old too; what would
i expect from the visit? My house is clean I have food in the cubords, I have spoilt my 16 year old son and now thinking about it this has got me no where, what do I do?

OP posts:
LilyBunch25 · 18/10/2026 11:46

NattyKnitter116 · 18/10/2026 11:23

As much as this annoys me too, I can’t get annoyed with the general public as they are being misled by journalists who are being misled by ill informed MP’s of all parties.

If you actually look at the stats for PIP, the massive claims increase is because far more people of all ages are claiming for MH issues and for disabilities acquired through lack of timely treatment for injury and illness.

These issues both arise from the long term cuts to MH services and to the NHS, which, again, while never perfect, traditionally gets hammered every time the govt changes.

The thing is, the PIP bill and PIP fraud level is tiny compared to the Basic State Pension which is the biggest benefit paid out.

That’s what makes me laugh the most, relatively healthy people banging on about ‘tax payers money’ and slagging off the long term sick and disabled (and in fact anyone less fortunate than themselves)

Yet they absolutely consider they have a right to a pension when they retire ‘because they’ve paid in’. For most people they will take out far more that they’ve ever paid in, which is why your pension is measured by your ‘National Insurance’ contributions.
Yes there are many holes to the argument but if you really dig in to it, most people would rather be working than not working and many of the structures and norms that existed in our society to help that are now gone.

You cant keep tipping water out of the bucket without replacing it then expect the bucket to be full.
Much of the standard of living increase we experienced in the 80’s was down to North Sea Gas and the end of the Cold War (massive reduction in standing army etc) so sudden influx of money to fund things like tax cuts and right to buy etc.
So if we want a better standard of living we need to increase economic growth.

The only way we’re going to do that is by allowing decent targeted immigration (screwed by Brexit) and attracting foreign investment.

The former certainly pisses off the ‘taxpayers money’ brigade.

It is an area very very close to my heart as I have been a welfare benefits specialist for 15 years and have seen so much change, trauma and, yes, the huge increase in claims due to the very reasons you highlight. I also care for a severely disabled veteran DH who is worse now because, despite the promises of the Armed Forces Covenant, stroke treatment as a civilian (post stroke) was delayed and I had to fight for rehabilitation for him which has still left him more disabled than may have been the case. As well as the high level of care he needs I am also a tax payer myself, and whilst I take on board your comment about many being influenced by the media I also maintain that people can still educate themselves via proper sources before commenting on what is a very emotive and close subject for many.

NattyKnitter116 · 18/10/2026 13:50

Thanks for your reply. Fair point. Actually now I think about it, the only reason we’re claiming PIP for my mum is because NHS delayed treating her brain bleed for days which left her disabled and for my sister because again, delayed NHS treatment for her MS has left her disabled.

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