I need to get over 'girl envy'

[IKnowIambeingmad]

My best friend has just had a girl. She already has a boy. I have two beautiful and healthy ds's but I feel quite envious that she now has a girl(but am v. happy for her too).
I have always wanted girls and both times I was really disappointed.
I know this feeling is stupid and irrational and I should be thankful,but I can't help it.
I do love my boys very much but feel like I'm missing something.
Please give me a slap.

For me, it's a case of the unknown. I am pg with no 3, have 2 DDs and would really like another. I feel I don't really know where to start with boys - don't know about diggers, football etc. A friend of mine said that all you needed to know was to point the willy down when changing a nappy and the rest would come in its own time. Hope she's right!

As for being devastated - I can see that the gender thing must seem trivial to anyone who has suffered the tragedy of a loss / infertility, but I think it is an emotional response over which (at least initially) one has no control. I will find out at the 20 week scan so that I can get my head around it. I would worry about finding out on the day if I had a real preference as I wouldn't want the first wonderful few days to be tainted by disappointment. Of course, whatever sex you want, being healthy is the most important thing, but if the baby is healthy but not the gender you expected / wanted, I think it is better to have those emotions out of the way in advance.

i will reiterate that personally the diappointment of a hot wet baby in your arms is far far less and far shorter lived than the disappointment on the cold scanning room table with 20 weeks of spd to go

Agree with ButterflyMcQueen. I think I'd be more likely to feel disappointed at the sex of a little baby in black and white on the screen, and have 20 weeks of worry about how will it be in the delivery room? For that reason I didn't find out the sex of mine either time, but especially since losing DD I wouldn't find out.

MrsG, I am very sorry to hear about your loss. That must have been terrible.

Alas, Butterfly McQ, we may have to agree to disagree . I like being in control (some would say to an unhealthy degree) and knowing what sex I am having enables me to plot and plan etc. If I didn't know but could have found out, I'd probably get even more worked up, esp as my actual births haven't been easy and I'm not expecting any different this time.

I have a 3 year old son and when I was pregnant I secretly longed for a Girl. However from the moment he was born we bonded.
Having a Son has changed my life for the better!! Its so fun!! I have always been a girly girl, into fashion , make up etc, So having a boy has made me do things I would never have dreamed of doing before!
It is hard work but worth it!
I get messy, play football (i am not sporty at all) play with trucks and cars and love walking in the rain!
I believe having a boy has bought out bit of my persnality I didnt know I even had.
Dont feel guilty Iknowiambeingmad your just being honest and you will be an amazing Mum whatever you have, boy / girl.
Also my friends and family always make comments about how straight foward boys are about what they and girls can be a bit whinny!! I know I can be anyway!! LOL!