Wild toddler kicked out of ballet class

[Tayebanks]

I’m really unsure if I’m doing something wrong DD is 2 (28m) and is very wild and energetic, she rarely listens to me outside of the house. We’re not a tantrum family she rarely has them she just prefers do her own thing. Her behaviour has caused me a lot of problems in public with people staring making me feel uncomfortable and because she’s also shy when people stare it makes her cry. She loves gymnastics class and we’ve never had any issues, she’s also very well behaved at nursery it’s just ballet class. We’ve been going for 2 terms now and she seems to enjoy it but recently she’d been getting very distracted preferring to play with the props the teacher leaves in reach than actually participate. I got a text message from the teacher and it made my mood feel dull because I’m actually proud of her improvement of being around new faces and trying her best to be involved but now I feel like that’s not the case. The problem is literally just her getting distracted because she likes to touch everything I do get involved and redirect her but I feel like she doesn’t feel involved. Also when she’s doing her side quests it’s not distracting the rest of the class at all. Do I pull her from ballet or stick it out?

It sounds like the only reason she doesn't have tantrums is you impose no boundaries and she just does what she likes.

She will find starting school very difficult if you carry on like that, because there will be a expectation she follows instructions even when it's not something she wants to do.
And know she won't just 'grow into' doing as she's told, if she hasn't ever had to.

Sounds like ballet and the structure of such activity is not for her at this age at least, or you may find for her personality and that’s fine. Even as young as two they have their strengths and weaknesses. I know two of my girls would have been absolutely fine in such setting….my other daughter….would have been disastrous 🫣😂. I wouldn’t feel disheartened it is what it is and I wouldn’t keep that club going for her. X

She is 2 years old!! My ballet obsessed son would have struggled with that age 2!

If she has low immunity, nursery and classes will be much more likely to cause a problem than running round in a park.

OP is English not your first language or did you use AI to write your op?

She’s fine in gymnastics but not ballet so I would take her out of ballet for now. One of my daughters is the same. She had no interest in ballet but loves gymnastics. Other activities she does and loves are

football
Ice skating
rugby

maybe try one of these

You haven’t said what was in the text from the teacher that seems to have triggered this. Was it the sitting out and not joining in this week, or behaviour generally? Why are you feeling she is being judged in public if not tantrumming? Is her hearing being checked regularly as some medications can affect it. Dd did a ballet class as a toddler and soon wouldn’t join in, so took her out and restarted elsewhere a couple of years on which she then did until she left school.

She sounds like a totally normal 2 year old. Perhaps some 2 year olds are ready for a structured ballet class, but a lot won’t be ready yet and that’s fine.

Very well said.
I was thinking, reading through this thread, posters are very typical of bystanders in shops and cafés.
When a 2 year old in the supermarket is having a tantrum, some people sympathise with mum, they have been there and know it's inevitable that sometimes the terrible two's take over, some totally ignore it, and some tut and blow, as if the parent has caused it.

NO child is an angel all the time, just remember the people who look on with distaste either have never had children, or they have forgotten what it's like.

Personally, I would, like I said earlier, take her out of ballet classes, wrap her up warmly,and let her do her own thing in the park.

I love that , she doesn’t have tantrums , she just like to do her own thing. That’s probably why she doesn’t tantrum because she does what she likes so there are no boundaries and guide lines of expected behaviour. Saying that if she behaves in other places maybe ballet is not for her. You should stop going if she’s not following simple instructions and is disrupting other children .

Why does she never have a partner?

I came to say exactly this! I think little scrummers takes them from 3?

I think this is fairly normal behaviour for a 2yo. I've taken my dd to the same toddler music/dance class since she was 1, it goes up to 4yo. The little ones are often off doing something else or waving the wrong prop where as from about >2.5yo they tend to follow what the teacher is doing.
The teacher doesnt bat and eyelid, although she probably would stop a child from rifling through the bags of props kept to the side which are not intended to be used for the current class.

Ballet is a bit dull. Stick with more active things like gymnastics / swimming / football etc.

Absolutely not! Ballet is everything but dull in the right class. But this sounds like a pre-primary class usually meant for 4-5 year olds, so way too much for a 2 year old.

It's not rocket science, she is bored with the class if she prefers to fiddle with inanimate objects. You are stressed out enough to need confirmation from a professional that it isn't your fault. Could be better to pull her out without waiting for her to be thrown out by the teacher. Suggestions on here sound great to me: swimming, T-Ball, Ninja training and all kinds of martial arts.

She’s 2 FFS of course she gets distracted! I don’t think ballet is appropriate for that age really maybe she should do a tumble tots class. Maybe try again in a couple of years.

Sounds as if ballet class isn't her thing at the moment. Ballet involves explicit teaching and that requires engagement and interest from the little dancers. Your DD isn't there yet.

Yes, I'd take her out. If she likes running around, jumping, and whole body exercise, then maybe taking her swimming would be fun for her. Not swimming class but just a public or family swimming session. Or find a good challenging playground she can enjoy.

The teacher leaving props out within reach isn't the issue here. Work on getting her to listen to you. Praise 'good listening' when she has taken in an instruction you've given and complied with it.

She's old enough for you to start expecting this.

My eldest DD started ballet at 2 1/2 and was ready for it, loved it. Her younger sister was excited to go when she reached the same age but the ballet teacher called me aside after 3 lessons and said she was well behaved but just wanted to sit it out at the side and maybe it wasn’t right for her at that time. She decided at 8 that she wanted to go back and this time it was perfect for her - caught up very quickly with her peers, went up through all the RAD grades, loved the shows and continued as a hobby in uni. The timing has to be right for the individual child.

My DD was brought by the hand out of her ballet class with teacher saying ‘I can’t control her’
She was 3 1/2 and I gave birth to her brother later that night. Maybe she sensed something was up!
To add - she gave up ballet and became a sprinter, and now at 25 she does pole fitness.
Ballet isn’t right for everyone.

28m is very young for a ballet class- I did a ballet class as a child and they wouldn't take any child under 4.

Ballet is so strict. My 2 and 4 year olds found it far too restrictive. 5 year old once they are a bit more used to behaving at school might be a good to try again.

This is super cute ☺️

I'd remove her for a year as if she's playing with items in the class rather than dance. Then take her out. Please let her be a child.
They don't have to be signed up for everything. Just let her be home with you playing with her dolls and things.

Both my dc were like this at baby / toddler groups. Not the least bit interested in structured activities they usually found a playmate and ran off doing their own thing together

This is why I took my dd out of toddler ballet. She was in the minority of kids who weren’t interested. If it’s any help I enrolled her into a more formal ballet school when she started school and she did very well there going on to do grades and shows.

The only class my dc liked was tumble tots. I think because it’s more physical and they get to explore.

She sounds like she’s bored, ballet isn’t for everyone .., my daughter was 3 as the same so we tried something else. Maybe she would
prefer something more active where you don’t have to listen and concentrate as much. You can always try again once she’s older.
If she enjoys running about try girls football.