Is 35 too old to have a baby?

[Poodlezzz]

Thinking energy wise, health issues, not having a huge multi generational age gap as they grow, being an old grandparent, and other practicalities….

I think whenever people say this a lot of it is down to the fact that they have been parenting kids for 10+ years.

Not to say it isn’t harder but at 33 I’m not tired at all. If I had a baby yes I would probably be tired, and I would also be tired if I had a 10 year old. The only way to not be tired is to not have kids so it’s much of a muchness.

I just had a baby a final bonus baby 42. I honestly haven’t had one person suggest this was too old.

I wouldn’t at the age of 35 but that’s my preference. Women do have babies 35+

I think situation is also quite significant. Do you have children already do you really want to go back to that now you have your independence back or is it a first child and your desperate to be a mum.

Because they're polite.
i wouldn't say it to your face but i do think 42 is too old. Sorry!

This seems like a crazy question to me, I’m 34 and just had my second baby 6 months ago

I just think if your body can still make children then obviously you aren’t “too old” you’re only too old when you physically can’t do it anymore

I was 33 with DS and the first of my friends. Few others followed within a year so 34 then had their seconds quite soon so 35/6 then I had twins at 37 and another had her first soon after at 38. My sister had her third at 38 and her fourth at 44.

It was the baby at 33 who was poorly with wonky chromosomes. The twins at 37 were big, juicy and as "standard issue" as they come.

That's because people get offended easily these days son nobody comments on anything but 42 is old to be having a baby. The risk to a baby having birth defects increases significantly at this age. We really shouldn't be normalising people having babies late in life.

I had a little boy before this one who died. Honestly, I think people are just happy for us that we got this chance.

I had my son at 35, in fact I was 3 weeks off my 36th birthday!! I was lucky as I fell pregnant on the first try. So no, you're not too old!

No I had my son born a few months before my 40th birthday and we were both very healthy. I had a great pregnancy and a happy child.

What about a ten year gap

That's great that you where both healthy but its still classed as a high risk. That's like saying I never wear a seat belt and haven't died so it must be ok.

I knew someone who had a baby aged 45 back in 1960!

Sorry for your loss
If I'd known that, I wouldn't have said you're too old.

No of course not! Many women have babies in their mid-late 30s.
I think 35 is on the cusp of biologically being classed as an older mother but it has always been a completely normal age to have a child.

FFS maybe think before you speak next time then!

Personally it was my cut off. Had my first at 30 and now expecting no 2 at 33. But, I caveat that with the fact I was lucky enough to meet DH at 25. Had I met my partner later, I may well have gone for kids later - I can't imagine not having them at all so I'd choose later over never. It's very circumstantial. There's ideal timing and then there's life... And both those things look different for everyone!

Mum had me at 43.

Not at all. I had my now 21yo DD at 37 after a long fertility struggle - it has never been an issue, there were actually quite a few older mums than me at the school gates and it’s becoming even more common nowadays. DM had my youngest sister at 40 - again it has never been a problem whatsoever. She is 91 now and has lived a very happy, active & healthy life with all of the many grandchildren in our family. They certainly haven’t missed out by not having a ‘young’ granny.

The silver lining of being older was that we were very financially stable (we were able to send DD to prep school and afford private maternity care for example) and I’d had time to really build and be successful in my career without interruptions.

You can develop health issues etc at any age. Life is too short to worry about every eventuality OP - have the baby at a time that suits you

No. It’s normal nowadays.

It’s fine!

I hope not because Im 36 and just had my second. I don't think I could handle a third pregnancy now with 2 under 3 but 100% would be fine to have my first now and for a good few years.

I think it depends on if you have kids already. Maybe not too old at 35 but I'd have a plan to start having DC if you really wanted a child.