Mum shamed for easter

[Scottyme]

My toddler doesn’t overly like chocolate or sweets and has got a little egg from their nan so not like they haven’t got an egg. So I as a treat took my little one to Smyths to buy a toy instead but my partners friend, a relatively new first time mum, said I was spoiling them and they would never buy anything other than a egg for her child.

My argument is my child doesn’t really like chocolate anyway and they needed some more age appropriate toys now and they would get much more out of a £15 scooter, than an egg. But she didn’t just say it and leave it she kept not picking how they couldn’t send their children to nursery couldn’t think of anything worse than palming their children off to strangers etc.

I just feel like crap now for trying to do the best for my child 😢

Ignore them. They are judgemental fools. I gave my grandchildren some money instead of an egg as there are allergies to consider and children don't need tons of chocolate.

Yeah ignore....who cares what she thinks. She can do what she wants at Easter with her own child as can you. Don't give her opinion any more headspace.

Sounds as though she’s quite opinionated and doesn’t mind telling people what those opinions are.

I’ve always been in the egg only camo for Easter but then I’m probably a fair bit older than you.

I would try and ignore her and enjoy your day with your LO, what this Woman thinks shouldn’t be tainting your day

Nope, never bought my child an Easter egg. As yours they didn't really like chocolate, and got given eggs from family members so we always got a gift. One year we clubbed together with grandma and got him his first new bike!

Why are you bothered what some random person thinks? You know your child best. Just ignore her.

Ahhh I'm sorry you feeling horrible now. Try ignore people like that, their meanness is not worth it. She clearly has her own issues, that she is nit picking at you, and trying to drag you down over anything.

My best friends little one is four now, he gets a bunch of eggs and toys in his hunt. Why because she loves Easter like others love Christmas, and her son celebrates in style. Who cares if people think it's spoiling. And what is wrong even if its spoiling on a special occasion? That's what having childhood fun is about, rhe magic of it all. And in your case, you being the best mother to your child's needs. Would be a bit mean if you only gave eggs to a child who isn't a fan of that. I think it's fabulous, get them gets, it's about what matters to your child, ignore the nasty noise of others.

A child that doesn’t like chocolate or sweets? You do know that you can moderate what they eat. My children will have one egg each. I do try to justify if by saying they are not that keen on sweet stuff but deep down I know they would eat all of the eggs if I allowed them to. And drink fizzy drinks and available anything green 🤣

Your partner's friend? Ignore it.

Why would you give a fig what your partner’s friend says?

as kindly as possible, tell them to mind their own business!

Once I was old enough it was money or eggs, I chose money. Same with Guy Fawkes night, box of fireworks or money.

DD has some eggs from family, some money and I get her a little toy (monster high stationary set £1 and mini brands fiver).

You do you

Yes, do what works for you & your DC. That’s what matters.
Have a lovely Easter Day x

It is absolutely none of her concern how you parent your child. If she says it to you, you would be more than reasonable to tell her that.

Children, like adults, have different tastes. My child would genuinely pick raspberries over chocolate and won't drink squash or fizzy drinks.

Oh ignore them. I’m an older mum and one of the benefits has been less comments etc like this (I’m sure people still judge but are less inclined to say it to my face!) I think it’s because I’m very much in my ‘don’t care for your opinion and not afraid to tell you so’ phase of life.

Sounds like your child is still quite little. We did presents rather than chocolate for the first few years at Easter, nothing huge but just little things to mark the occasion which we like to do - whether the baby ‘knows’ it’s Easter or not. Last year there was some chocolate but also a couple of crafty bits and stickers etc, mostly because she gets eggs from family too so was trying to break it up. This year we’ve just embraced the sugar fest and it’s all eggs/ chocolate bunnies but it’s the first time it has been.

Ignore the nursery bollocks as well. If you need childcare you need childcare - everyone makes the decision that works for their family and anyone who can’t understand that sounds a bit thick and overly concerned with what other parents (mums) are doing. Not to mention rude and tone deaf if she’s saying that to you as a parent who does need nursery - I mean who does that? There’s loads of things other parents do that I couldn’t ever see myself doing, don’t understand or don't think would work for us - but ultimately it’s non of my business and not my place to comment - ESPECIALLY TO THEIR FACE.

Also - I distinctly remember getting non-egg gifts sometimes as a child myself. Not every year but occasionally. Including one year a prized possession of a Jason Donovan special VHS tape, told you I was old!!

@Scottyme at least your kid will still have all their teeth when they are 30 years old!!! when my kids were young I never bought any eggs, they got enough chocolate from everyone else. I always let them choose a toy instead!

Well she sounds a bit mouthy.

Honestly, you'll always come across people who have different opinions. Most people are a bit more diplomatic than this person though and understand that people can make different choices that are all perfectly OK.

Do you really feel the need for her approval? I expect not.

Just carry on as you are. You are your child’s mother and you do exactly what works best for you and your family dynamics.

Mine are teenagers now but they still do and have always had a range of little gifts to hunt for in the garden. A few little eggs but also some general gifts like lip balms, shower gel, a craft kit etc. It makes the hunt a bit more fun without involving too much chocolate. I honestly don't care what other people's opinions of that are. It's what we do.

Trust me you have to grow a thick skin as always at least one of those mums at school. I had a judgemental friend who hadn't even had kids yet "why you doing that??... Oh i wouldn't let him do that" she soon stopped when her child came along and quite frankly was a monster. Just smile and think "oh fuck off" you do you. And i bet he has a long time enjoying his scooter. X

Ignore. I've always done gifts rather than big eggs for DD. Relatives get her big eggs. We do an egg hunt with Reusuable plastic eggs which have some chocolate , some stickers or small little bits in. Then she gets a couple of toys as gifts.

It works well for us as often theres something she'd benefit from since christmas gifts were received and her birthday is a way off. Breaks the year up a bit.

She likes chocolate but for small kids I think being given several large chocolate eggs is overwhelming and my DD never eats them all anyway. So they hang around and eventually either get eaten by us or mwlted into something else to eat when baking.

Sounds like you're a very sensible loving mum to me.

Thanks ladies I think it’s because I’m a bit delicate mentally at the moment for various reasons and I dont judge other parents because I have no idea what they are going through and it’s how they choose to bring their child up even if I agree or disagree.

child is currently laughing their head off scooting round the garden

But not all children are the same.

My ds HATES fizzy drinks, he doesn't like the burning sensation of the citric acid on his tongue. Even as a 16yo, he still won't touch them.

And he won't eat creme eggs either, too sickly.

He's happily munching his way through a dark chocolate egg as I type.

"Child is currently laughing their head off scooting round the garden"

How lovely. 🙂 Have a lovely Easter.

Honestly they don’t nothing is off limits in my house they choose their own foods within reason and if I put a platter or chocolate sweets and veg mine would choose the veg or a banana

We used to get a new outfit at Easter when we were little - I think it's vaguely traditional, like an extension of an Easter bonnet maybe? New clothes for spring and summer? Anyway, my point is loads of chocolate etc isn't the only way to mark Easter and a toy sounds lovely and will last longer!!

My children would eat all the eggs if they could and it be their diet for a week …I haven’t bought them Easter eggs for years. I put money in their account and buy them a little gift.

The nursery comment just ignore, easier said than done but honestly you know you’re doing the best for your child. This ‘friend’ sounds like one of those with opinion's and believe them to be facts.