4 year old son has asked for fairy wings and wand for Christmas

[Jenb1993]

Our 4 year old son has asked for a fairy wand and purple fairy wings for Christmas. My husband is not impressed and has said we need to stop him watching ‘Ben and Holly’s kingdom’ as this is clearly where he has got the idea from and we can not get him this for Christmas.

He has asked for three things this Christmas. A fairy wand, fairy wings and a police car. He wakes up in the morning telling me how excited he is for Santa to come and how he has been dreaming about getting a wand and fairy wings.

My husband tried to tell him that girls are only fairy’s and he should ask for dragon wings but our son doesn’t understand and desperately wants fairy wings.

I personally don’t have a problem with this, I love his imagination and I know that it’s just a phase. He really thinks this is what Santa will be getting him.

Just wanting some opinions and advice on how I should approach this with my husband.

buy him what he wants with joy!!!

Boys can be fairies. What about Cosmo in fairly odd parents?

How do you approach it with DH? Bluntly.

You tell him to stop being such a ridiculous, sexist and misogynistic twat, then you get DS his fairy wings and wand (and the police car).

Your son should be allowed to explore and enjoy the things he likes, regardless of outdated gender stereotypes. Supporting his preferences will help him grow into a confident, well-adjusted individual. It's important to prioritize his happiness and development over societal norms or personal biases. . . h . ..... Let him have the dressing up he wants, and encourage his self-expression without hesitation.

My son has a fairy costume. Your DH is being silly.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disney_Fairies

Most of the fairy characters are young and female, but older, taller and male fairy characters are also included. The males are sometimes referred to as "sparrow men," though the term "fairies" is used to refer to both female and male fairy characters.

Get ypur son the makings of the wand and wings and get your DH to show him how to make a light up wand with a battery, a switch from a paper clip and a paper fastener. and get ahead of the DT in school. You might be able to light up the edge of the wings with a chain of LED battery lights. They do boy things together and your son gets bragging rights over being a fairy mechanic.

Inform your husband that there is a simple process for working out whether a given toy is suitable for boys:

1. Observe toy. Is it operated with the genitals?
2. If no, it is suitable for boys or girls
3. If yes, it is not suitable for any children at all.

OP have you stopped laughing at your idiot husband yet? and did you know he was an idiot when you married him?

It's time to give this an airing again. It has a flowchart explaining how you decide whether a toy is for a boy or a girl. You may wish to show it to your DH 😜
https://www.vox.com/2015/3/10/8184119/toy-for-boy-or-girl

Has your DH not heard of the forbidden fruit phenomenon? Banning something will just make it all the more appealing.

Over the years, my DS asked for (and got) a baby doll, toy kitchen, hairdressing set and a massive Little Mermaid cuddly toy as big as he was, along with loads of lego, trains, fire engines and other stuff that your DH would probably approve of. He is now a big, hairy, heterosexual bloke who loves both musical theatre and trains.

Come on now people...a plopper with a froth making thread? The husband's as fictional as the fairies.

Get the fairy wings and wand. Wish for a more enlightened husband.

100% get the fairy wings! My brother used to wear my dresses when I was little (similar age) it was just all part of fun and getting dressed up!

Seem to remember the fairies in Lord of the Rings were pretty kick ass 🤔

Let your son have the wings and a wand!
Your DH is being daft
(is he worried DS might turn him into a toad?)

My nearly 3 year old son loves Ben and Holly. Always shouts ‘I’m an elf’ whilst blowing his imaginary dandelion clock. Also loves his pink pram and dolly JJ. I love this about him considering he’s got a baby sister to grow up with and protect.
Imaginative play is a wonderful thing to encourage. Much better than staring at a screen.
As many of the other posters are saying your husband is being ridiculous. Give his head a wobble!

Were you aware your DH was such a wanker before this incident?

Voting for wings and wand as well! How adorable being into magic and fairies!

You want advice on how to approach your husband?
Tell him you're ashamed he's such a twat, and you wonder whats influenced him to be like this so you can stop him doing/seeing it.

1965, surely? By the time I was growing up in the 70s boys were wearing make-up and had long hair and girls were in dungarees and had short hair. We were all gender-bending like mad but none of us pretended we were the opposite sex.

OP, is your husband homophobic? I'd be concerned if he was. It's something that needs tackling now.

I completely agree with all the other posts, you should absolutely get the fairy wings and wand. My son had fairy wings and a wand around age 3/4, a pink buggy when he was age 2/3 to push his favourite cuddly toy in, he also had lots of super hero, vehicle etc type stuff too. I basically let him lead the way and pick his preference of toys. He is 10 now and prefers football and gaming, as a parent we need to let them find their own way and not allow anyone to shame them for their choices.

To OPs husband: Don't be such a sexist arse. Let your boy have his wings! 🪽

Tell your dh that if he suppresses his ds play now he is likely to create some sort of trauma that might result in him turning out gay or transgender

That's his fear isn't it.

Idiot. But maybe you'll scare him into letting your little boy play as he wants to.

Your husband is an insecure small-minded idiot.

Get your little boy the fairy wings and wand.