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Piercing DD's (2.5) ears - best kind of stud?

210 replies

MauveOrPossiblyTaupe · 18/11/2024 18:33

Hi all, it's that time! We're v excited about DD's first piercing but this time we're thinking of a stone, not just plain gold? Any suggestions?!?!?

OP posts:
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Wishfives · 18/11/2024 20:23

Dirtyprotest · 18/11/2024 20:20

She didnt. But they are better placed to answer rather than 6 pages of mums saying its a bad idea.

HTH

Why though? Why is it better there?
The child is 2.5 years old, she can't wipe her own bum properly, how is she going to look after ( unnecessary ) earrings .

SnowLeopard5 · 18/11/2024 20:23

Surely it is more exciting to wait until your child wants to get them done and you have a special trip together rather than take her choice away from her?!

MrsSunshine2b · 18/11/2024 20:25

Hoppinggreen · 18/11/2024 20:21

sadly yes, I was in Claires once and a lady with a baby was arguing with a staff member who refused to pierce he Baby's ears. The issue was that apparently the mother didn't have the babies birth certificate and so couldn't prove her baby was 4 MONTHS OLD!!!!
I judged like fuck that day.

I was in Claire's with my daughter a few weeks ago and suddenly heard awful screaming and crying from a toddler having her ears pierced. The staff member was laughing and the mother was trying to hold the child down so they could do the other ear. I felt sick and just walked straight out. DD likes all the sparkly bows and things but we won't be shopping there again.

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ExMachina · 18/11/2024 20:26

MrsSunshine2b · 18/11/2024 20:17

Reasons to overrule a child's bodily autonomy: medical, hygiene, health.

Culture is never an excuse.

I try not to get into such debates, because across cultures things are done to children and adults that people from other cultures would abhor. And largely largely are stuck to their thinking patterns (Including me!) so the debates are rarely productive

ExMachina · 18/11/2024 20:27

Wishfives · 18/11/2024 20:17

What a twatty comment

I actually took it as she meant ask somewhere where you'll likely get a range of opinions, rather than meaning anything derogatory

Wishfives · 18/11/2024 20:27

@missapologies for the @ I can't remove it @MrsSunshine2b Claire's used to teach the piecing of ears on small pieces of square foam as long as you could hit the dot (or very near to it) you were free to pierce paying customers

AlwaysGinPlease · 18/11/2024 20:30

Too young. Cruel and tacky as fuck.

Bumbleebeetree · 18/11/2024 20:30

Piercing a 2 year old's ears is so unnecessary and cruel...

MrsSunshine2b · 18/11/2024 20:31

ExMachina · 18/11/2024 20:26

I try not to get into such debates, because across cultures things are done to children and adults that people from other cultures would abhor. And largely largely are stuck to their thinking patterns (Including me!) so the debates are rarely productive

When that "cultural norm" violates the bodily autonomy of children, they are abhorred by other cultures yes, and often by people within the culture too, because it's abhorrent. Piercing babies' ears. Cutting bits of little boys' penises off. Cutting bits of little girls' labia off. None of it is OK.

Mumtobabyhavoc · 18/11/2024 20:32

On one hand it looks cute, but on the other I see bizarre objectification of a baby. Since I can see the weird side I have to say, No. Don't 'beautify' a child for the adoration of adults. Eew.

LBFseBrom · 18/11/2024 20:38

Are you for real?

I realise it is traditional in some cultures for baby girls to have their ears pierced. I am hoping that is your reason, you said 'it's that time of year' so maybe a Hindu festival or something.

If there is no cultural or religious tradition, why are you going to subject your little child to such a procedure?

I wonder if you are real or just posting to cause controversy.

chickennoodless · 18/11/2024 20:39

ExMachina · 18/11/2024 20:26

I try not to get into such debates, because across cultures things are done to children and adults that people from other cultures would abhor. And largely largely are stuck to their thinking patterns (Including me!) so the debates are rarely productive

@ExMachina I totally agree!

My son attends the local very diverse school, lots of the girls have worn gold studs since nursery and continue to do so. School understands it is part of their culture and allows it, however hoops are banned for safety.

None of the white middle class mums have ever batted an eyelid!

DottieMoon · 18/11/2024 20:43

FFS she’s 2, what are you thinking!

PerfectStorm00 · 18/11/2024 20:44

Hoppinggreen · 18/11/2024 18:50

OOOOHHH!!!
making unecessary holes in your child for no reason at all, how exciting.
Maybe go with large hoops?

The bigger the hoops the bigger the hoe!

Artistbythewater · 18/11/2024 20:45

PerfectStorm00 · 18/11/2024 20:44

The bigger the hoops the bigger the hoe!

😂😂😂

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 18/11/2024 20:53

@Lyannaa I worked in paediatrics and can honestly say I have never met a paediatrician who performed ear piercing on children!!

anon202420252026 · 18/11/2024 20:54

Dd was 3 when she got her first set done. She picked silver earrings and a pink gemstone. They healed quickly and they can be changed to different earrings in 3 weeks.

Kitkat1523 · 18/11/2024 20:57

TeenLifeMum · 18/11/2024 18:57

Who wouldn’t put their toddler at risk of infection. Perfect age for it. 🙄

This 🙄

SecretSoul · 18/11/2024 21:04

Lyannaa · 18/11/2024 19:59

@SecretSoul no it doesn't help. You are talking abject rubbish. Having a child's ears pierced is NOT mutilation ffs.

You obviously don't understand how Mumsnet works - the parenting board is supposed to be supportive.

That means keeping your opinions to yourself about parenting that is legal but which you might not agree with.

For example, I don't agree with punishing children because I don't think it helps them develop into well rounded adults. And since I have young adults, I'm more than qualified to have that opinion.

BUT if someone was talking about punishing their child or imposing a sanction on here, I would not be nasty and say 'you are a shit parents'

Dear god.

To start with, you claimed referencing other areas of parenting wasn't whataboutery - when it very clearly is. Other aspects of parenting are nothing to do with ear piercing at all and whataboutery isn't helpful to any discussion.

Secondly, the dictionary definition of mutilation is "to injure, disfigure, or make imperfect by removing or irreparably damaging parts" - which pretty much nails the definition of piercing a child's ears.

Is it a bit excessive to describe it as mutilation? Yes, probably. But then I think it's a bit excessive to puncture holes in a small child's ears.

The parenting board is supportive but that doesn't mean you turn a blind eye when asked an opinion on things which the vast majority of people would consider to be harmful, abusive, or in any other way damaging to the child. And the vast majority of people do share that view in the UK, as can be seen from the comments here.

And it's rather ironic that you talk about being supportive of parents when you're the one who's been derogatory about parents who shout at their children.

Piercing a child's ears may not technically be illegal but as per a PP, piercers can't get insurance now to pierce a child that young so it's clearly a very big issue that even the piercing industry recognises.

I can't even begin to comprehend why anyone thinks it would be OK to do something to their baby's body that is permanent, unless medically indicated.

But quite aside all of the ethical issues, it often causes problems for the piercing anyway as the child grows, and it can also damage the ear cartilage.

So, plenty of reasons not to pierce a baby or young child's ears that are both ethical and medical. In contrast, what's your reasoning for piercing a child's ears? "Because it looks pretty" or "because she asked for it"? Doesn't even come close to a compelling counter-argument.

EwwSprouts · 18/11/2024 21:08

I would choose sparkly shoes over inflicting pain for a toddler.

JudgeJ · 18/11/2024 21:12

Hercisback1 · 18/11/2024 18:49

Why?

Leave it til she's older.

When I had my first baby in a Med country my friends at work couldn't understand that she hadn't had her ears pierced before leaving the hospital as was their custom!

BentoBoxFresh · 18/11/2024 21:14

The best piercing for a toddler is....none at all.

pompey38 · 18/11/2024 21:15

MauveOrPossiblyTaupe · 18/11/2024 18:33

Hi all, it's that time! We're v excited about DD's first piercing but this time we're thinking of a stone, not just plain gold? Any suggestions?!?!?

Her birth month stone ,not with a gun though , take her to a proper piercing place . I had mine’s done at three months , not a peep

pompey38 · 18/11/2024 21:17

BentoBoxFresh · 18/11/2024 21:14

The best piercing for a toddler is....none at all.

Says who?

CowTown · 18/11/2024 21:19

MauveOrPossiblyTaupe · 18/11/2024 19:16

Thanks everyone! Some strong views. I'm going to research this and think again about the idea.

I’m not going to tell you how to parent, but I will share that I have a very girly teenage daughter who just does not like earrings. She’s never wanted her ears pierced and is glad I didn’t do this to her when she was too young to decide for herself. Just something to consider.