there are many threads here preaching a 'holier than thou' message, and I want to say.........

[Psychomum5]

......I am not perfect, I am not the greatest mum ever (altho I really would like to be able to say I am), and I am also not the best person to ask for advice on feeding kiddies the 'perfect' diet........

there are many threads here stating how we feed our DC's, treat out DC's, raise our DC's, and for the most part we all agree....

but surely.....(and I speak a lot for myself here)

sometimes we also LIE!!!

I have my standards, and 75% of the time I try to stick to them, but 25% of the time I either fail, or take my time remembering and so parenting cana be a little slack in these periods.

BUT

when there are threads here, I give advice and sometimes realise that I have 'twisted' the truth somewhat in my favour......

I don;t give my kiddies as much veg as I claim at times....or at least...I find I offer said veg, just they refuse it and it ends in the bin. (Altho that is not the post I would add at times)'

I offer fruit each day....only 3 of them eat with any enjoyment, and the other 2 have suplements.

I give them chocolate every day, and icecream, and pudding (well, that comes under the icecream TBH), they have crisps too most days...........

I have smacked them (altho sinse being here more, I haven;t and even DD1 said the other day that she can;t remember me ever smacking altho I still threaten it for the 'count to three' threat. It works, as I have never got to 3...!

I even allow a take-away each week.....

Oh, and as for chicken.....no idea where it comes from, altho that will be changing soon as the taste is definatley different as I have tested

and...............I drive to school......

please tell me I haven't confessed all and am now going to be pelted with stones....

Can I do the ole "a happy parent makes a happy child" thing now?

I do honestly think in the long run, a little bit too much TV or a sweet or ten here and a can of pop there is much better for a child than a parent who is desperately stressed out at trying to get everything 'right'.

lol, oblomov, i think as the eldest of four children myself my pfb-ness has come out with me going in the opposite direction and setting out to be a mum like i saw my mum being to my youngest sister rather than the slightly highly string manner that she parented me. (only slightly highly strung, to be fair, i did inherit my impossibly low standards from my mother... ) in our family we've often talked about how the eldest two trained our parents to be better parents to the youngest two.

ive noticed the things people say and the responses they get vary due to which every board they post on,

such as, if someone where to say, i give my baby, baby food jars for an easier life, on the weaning boards, the response would be oh id never give my baby jars
or baby rice! but if the same comment was posted on parenting you get, noting wrong with jars if it makes life easier for you.

ive also noticed diffrences with things like cc on the sleep and parenting boards

mmmmmmm....interesting........

aitch....you are so right.....I am a much better parent to the boys (and more relaxed too) than I ever was at that age with the girls.

I remember getting terribly wound up over the eating habits of DD1, and how long it used to take, and how 'by the book' I should be......right down to what she HAD to eat and what she wan't even allowed to SEE, let alone try!.

If I met my PFB self now, I think I may need to slap her!

and you know what......she was HELL to feed from 4 upwards. all the good work I did went down the pan (well, in the bin to be precise), and she wouldn't eat anything like she had before....and of course DD2 copied copiesly so where-as before I had daughters who would eat and try anything I offered, now they refused all....and veg for about 4yrs were whizzed and hidden in sauces and as bases for pizza's and pasta sauce. I made myself cry on many occasion, and thought I had damaged them terribly.

they are now teens, (or nearly there at least), and back to the girls they were before they started school. they (well, only DD1 at the mo, altho DD2 will eat all she used to), now try new things, will ask for more fruit and veg, and eat without complaint what I cook!. (well, unless PMT is in the huse of course).

but the boys......well.......for them (especially DS2 has he was on a very restricted allergy diet until he was 4), it was anything goes as long as they eat it. to the point now that a roast for them consists of meat, potatoes, yorkshire puds and 3 carrots for DS1, and DS2 just has the meat and yorkshire and lots of gravy (which does however have the veg water mixed in[winl]). DS2 can;t eat potatoes for some reason......they make him extremely sick! (even chips!), and I ignore the lack of ve as he will raid the fuit bowl incesently.(sp?).

DD3 is my only one who eats any and all that I give her.....and also is the only one who has over and above her body weight in fruit and veg......so maybe the 3rd baby is the one everyone gets it right for!!!!

i wouldn't give my baby jars, i couldn't imagine doing it. but then i did BLW because (as i think has already been mentioned on this thread by Boysontoast) it's even easier than jars.

i will never get why people think they are so important as to merit being judged on MN. if i post something, it's a percent of a percent of a percent of who i am, why would i think someone would care about me enough to judge me. personally, i rarely remember the names from one thread to the next.

my 3rd sibling is the only boy, has wandered through life being extremely golden and lucky and is easily the happiest out of the lot of us. nice guy too. i think there's something in that. being the last baby must be a pressure too...

I don't do jars and processed food here is fish fingers or cripsy pancakes, the rest is fresh, but that's my choice.
It's the bits i feel are important, whereas someone else might think DD should have clean tights everyday

clean tights every day! think of the planet!

One of mine found a dried apricot under the fridge the other day of unknown origin and I let her eat it - is that a confession too far?

maybe.....

nah.......I found DD1 once eating dogfood at a friends, from a bowl that had been outside for days....

altho, she never tried it again.

oh thank god psycho - I didn't want to kill a thread with the mankiest confession of all hanging there - I imagined lots of pursed lips and squashing of bosoms with folded arms...

LOL.

bet you were shiting yourself there for a moment weren;t you!??? Your big confession be there and not hidden by other bad stuff we all do at times

Cracking thread and some great points made! I must admit I've only skimmed through though .

I do worry that I'm doing the best for DD, but tend to worry more on a emotional development level, whereas DH worries if she isn't eating enough. Overall, we get the balance and DD is a pretty chilled and happy toddler (I hope......)!

Nah - I wasnt pressing f5 over and over again with increasing panic at all - especially as I'm going to a MN meet next week and don't really want to give the impression that my children spend thier evenings finding their own dinner in black bin bags like in that Save the Children advert.

"This week, padboz's children will be finding thier own dinner again..."

I do feed them things from inside the fridge btw - not just stuff they source from under it....

I've loved this thread! I hold my hands up- I do feel judged!! I feel my parenting is judged by other mums, the media, dds nursery, strangers at the supermarket, my inlaws, my own family...A lot of people DO look down at other people's parenting to make themselves feel better. And I'm not always feeling so great and sure of myself that it doesn't make me feel bad! So, to me, this thread hasn't undermined my confidence- quite the opposite! It's made me feel that I'm OK. And actually quite normal! PHEW! What a relief!

Well said Jooly - it is nice to know you're not alone isn't it.

jooly, but it's weirdy insecure people who would bother their arses to judge you, can't you see that? why would you care what a weirdy insecure type thinks? [baffled]

If Jooly is anything like me, Aitch, then it is because she worries what everybody thinks, regardless of who they are or even if she knows them. Damned annoying and stressful.

well stop it. it's not doing you any good. how's the running? i've done nowt, lol.

Yes Mum!

Running suprisingly okay thanks. Am starting week two tomorrow so may have a different opinion after that .

Great thread, DS spends far too much time in front of Cbeebies (or family guy dvd's so he can learn swear words) so i can surf the computer (also another reason why my house is manky)!

Oh and we just polished off my ferrero rocher even though he didn't fancy his lunch!

week 2 was surprisingly okay ime. the last run i did was seek 2/3 and then i jurt my knee and got ill. i need to get back out there but amn't goinig while it's snowing. i can just see me breaking my leg and then i'll be going nowhere. best to wait til it dries up, i think.

(seriously though, stop that negative judgey thinking, all it does is make you unhappy. no-one else even notices. that's kind of the reason why i am conscious of it, i think it's a trap women fall into all the time and i do not want dd to be subject to all that 'i'm so crap' stuff. or as little of it as is humanly possible. these little comments where women put themselves down in front of their daughters, i think that's where it starts.)

My god Padboz, that's called a snack in my house!(if they find a couple of cheerios at the same time, then it's breakfast)

You are right Aitch. I do need to be a better role model to DD as I really don't want her ending up like me. I want her to care about people but also to have strength of character to do what she wants, if that makes sense.