Husband pushed 4 year old over who fell and banged his head

[Wishbub]

Not sure this is the right page, but i really don't know what to do. Husband has a bad temper which mainly results in shouting and some hitting of our 4 year old. Today was the worst, my son fell and banged his head, he now had a large lump on the back of his head.

I told my husband that this is physical abuse of a child, which he ridiculed, saying it was just an accident. I told him I have to protect our son, so he's said that he'll kill himself and be out of our way.

I'm currently breast feeding a small baby and feeling incredibly unwell, I don't know what to do...

Agree go to A &E and let them know it's non accidental and you are vulnerable. Please do what you can to rescue yourself and your DC from this abusive situation so your terrified little boy can start to heal.

Please please please get out. Take your child to hospital, let them know what happened and that you are scared. They will help you. Please don't let your child get hurt again by that evil man. He could have died hitting his head. At least ring woman's aid and let them help you get away.

This tbh. I clicked on the thread thinking it may have been a horrible accident or something. He has no remorse, no desire to improve himself and is selfish. This is abuse and he isn't changing anytime soon

Like others say you will lose your son if you don't take decisive action to protect him. This could include ; get to A and E and tell them what happened, call the police or social services , get to safe place with family or friends and make the appropriate calls . Be brave you can do this.

Please take your child ti the hospital and report this.

I'm so sorry you're having to go through this.

He shouts and hits your four year old? That’s heartbreaking. You need to do the right thing and protect your son, it’s time for him to leave

Get out with your babies. Go anywhere and CALL THE POLICE.
You are enabling the abuse by not acting.
This is NOT NORMAL
NOT OK
ABUSIVE
HE IS A VIOLENT ABUSER

I'm sure everyone else has said the same but you need to call the police and, if you need help with housing and money, contact Women's Aid.

Your husband is abusive and has now actually injured your small child. Have you sought medical attention for his head injury?You need to keep him safe. You have the power to remove him from this dangerous situation and you must do so. There is nothing more important than your children's safety. There is help available and you will not be homeless or hungry, whatever happens.

It's really important that you call the police, or ask a medical professional to do so when you take your son to be seen. You need this to be documented and your child's injury needs to be evidenced. Do not delay.

Omg, your son needs checked at hospital. Husband needs jailed

Your son may have delayed concussion. Go to the hospital now. With both children. This is physical abuse and the fact he is denying it is worse. Tell the hospital and police will remove him too. Protect your children and yourelf

so hard without support around but there are agencies that can help
step one - medical attention
can you drive?

OP - I know how frightening it must feel to think of ending your marriage, to start a new life. Yes it won't be easy. But think how much worse you'll feel if you stay in this situation and your helpless children continue to be abused. It wasn't a one off, it was a continuation of violence against your son. Imagine the world through the eyes of your son - this big man who is supposed to protect him is physically and emotionally hurting him. He must feel so scared. You know what you have to do.

Also, social services will rightly expect you to keep your child safe. At some point this abuse will require an ambulance or worse, or be picked up at school or the GP or when your child makes a disclosure to an adult. If it comes to light that you have allowed this abuse to continue unchecked and unreported, you could quite seriously lose both of your children. I absolutely guarantee that no man on earth is worth that.

Sorry I don't know you, but I'm worried sick for you and the babies. Please please seek medical help and report him to police. This is unacceptable.

It's not a one off if he's been hitting your son previously. As your son gets older, the abuse will likely get worse. Please protect your children and get out.

he sounds rather primitive OP, a cave man, no impulse control and no clue how to manage disagreements, he goes straight to threats to kill himself.
I would log everything and do a disappearing act, he sounds dangerous but too dumb to be a real threat as long as you are careful & strategic

I hope he does kill himself. One less child abuser in the world. One prick at a time.

So sorry you're going through this OP, please get your son seen to at the hospital if he's hit his head and tell them everything and the threat to kill himself. X

Does he have a history of head injuries himself OP, he sounds a bit brain damaged, not saying that to excuse him, you need to get you and your children away very quickly.

You need to go to A&E today as soon as the baby has finished a feed, change them, pack up a nappy bag, bundle them both up and go to the hospital.
When they asked how his head injury happened you tell them the truth and say you need help to get away from him.
They will start the process for you.
If you don't get your 4yr old checked out and something happens you will be considered complicit with his abuse.

Take action now, don't let him touch another hair on his head again.

The most worrying part of your post is the phrase 'some hitting'. Once should be a dealbreaker.

Also, even if this is the last time it ever happens. Even if he apologises. Says he will change. The damage is done and the only thing, the ONLY thing that will help your son become a happy and functioning adult and live the life he deserves is your action now.
I'm sorry for you. You must be terrified. But leaving and informing the authorities is a step you must take to protect your babies.

I admire everyone's faith in the system to protect this poor child but do you really think any action will be taken at the first report?

He's allowed.to "smack" his child in this country and children do sometimes get knocked over. My DSis managed to break her DS's arm by tripping over him. I don't think that was even reported by the hospital, but no one would have done anything if it had been without any previous concerns.

OP needs to take steps to leave. If she reports it (which she must also do) at best he'll be home within 24 hours.

Call Women's Aid and leave OP. The suicide threat is irrelevant. Even if he means it (which he doesn't) it's a choice between him and your son.

I was in your position and did nothing.

It got worse. I promise you it does not get better and it is NEVER a one-off.

Your children cannot be Guinea pigs as you find that out.

We escaped finally but not without huge struggled and great cost. I have many regrets. Don't be like I was.

He will be convincing but you have to harden for the sake of your children.

Oh and unfortunately he won't kill himself, it's a tactic to try and manipulate you, to make you feel worried about him when actually he is the one knocking about a tiny child.