Leaving 5 month old for 5 nights

[anotheronettc]

My husband is going on a work trip, all expenses paid, beautiful hotel in Italy. Lovely restaurants booked each evening and excursions. A place I've always wanted to visit.

I am employed by my husbands work and am invited on the trip as a plus one. Even though I'm on maternity leave looking after my five month old.

My sons grandparents are very involved in his life and have him often. Once overnight and he slept 10+ hours as he notmally does. He's bottle fed as I couldn't breast feed. He's a very calm happy baby.

Anyway.. everyone is saying I should go and make the most of the break to rest - as im suffering from a tilted pelvis and terrible back. However im in turmoil. Do I go or will I just be considered/and be an absolutely terrible mother. It's actually four nights but because of the time of the flight we would have to leave about 3 am so I'm counting it is five minutes. I know that this post will probably bring a lot of negativity my way people saying mean things however please be nice. Being a mother is a challenge and me and my husband haven't had a night together since my son was born so please don't come at me saying I'm a bad mum.

@Helpmyreno I’ve reported my own post. I’ve repeated a post I didn’t think had posted and it had. No need to repeat myself at you like an idiot!

A reply for anyone, who like me, was looking for posts like this for advice.

I went on the trip. I had a great time. I rested. I reconnected with my husband. My back pain has eased tremendously. My son was fine, we faced time every evening, he slept through the night with his grandparents. He is acting like nothing happened, same gorgeous happy baby. Yes I missed him, but I'm glad I went and his grandparents had the best time bonding with him.

Xx

So glad you went and enjoyed yourself.

That’s great. I can’t believe the amount of lengthy, judgy replies you’ve received on this post. You’re a great mum if you need a few days away, you’re a great mum if you don’t. But the the replies you’ve received well and truly belong in the gutter. I see why the comments ‘martyrdom’ and ‘perfect parent brigade’ are thrown around on mumsnet now.

I went to NYC for 5 nights when my son was 5 months old. It couldn’t be avoided anyway as it was my eldests birthday present booked before I was pregnant but still, my baby was fine, still the same child when I returned believe it or not 😅 he’s now 3 and I still haven’t noticed any damage yet 🙃

All depends on your baby, I couldn’t have left mine as was breastfeeding and he woke all night still at that age. If yours sleeps through (lucky you :)) and you won’t get anxious about leaving the baby then do it.

Lovely update, so glad you had a great time

Fab! So glad you went & had a good time Op xxx

In all honesty op, I'd go if I were you. Your baby will be safe and cared for by experienced grandparents who will dote on him. You're not a million miles away if you do want/need to come back early. It's a fantastic opportunity!

My son is 3 and I haven't had a night away yet, but that's totally different circumstances so I would definitely not judge you for going. I do judge others who just loooove to have a dig at other mums to make themselves feel better though.

I hope you go and have a wonderful time! However, if you do decide to stay home, make sure you rope in some help and look at doing some nice things at home. Maybe keep a cheeky little 'IOU' in your back pocket for your husband to have him for a few nights when he's older and you want a nice hotel break 😛

Ooops just seen it's an old thread and you went! I'm so glad you had a fantastic time!

It's about what you want and how you feel that matters, please stop worrying what others will think.

People think people are wrong for all sorts of reasons, why have you taken this one on board so much?

Do what you know to be the right thing by you and by your baby.

@Fivebyfive2 thanks lovely x

@beachcitygirl thanks x

Last week we had a mini 3 night holiday 3 hours' flight time away (4 months old baby).

We took the bub with us. Hired a nanny through an agency that hotel uses. Used her for one day and evening when we had to go out to an event. Can you do similar?
I'm a very easy going when it comes to bub BUT 5 nights would make me nervous.

We travel a lot with my husband for his work and we are taking the baby with us to every work trip. Not bloody easy 😂 but this is just the way it is now that we are parents 🤷‍♀️

@brookln hey love, Can't find a way to pin my latest reply but I went on the trip and did the five nights - missed him, but personally found it fine :) I have just learnt from this that it's completely individual and that each baby is very different x