Going out in pyjamas

[Jolie12345]

I often do the school run or pop to the local shop in the evening in my pyjamas. And I wouldn’t be ashamed to turn up to a friends or families house without putting on proper clothes. I’ve always been more interested in being comfortable than looking my best. I work from home so even if I do get dressed I come back and put pjs back on. Is it just me? Do you judge people who step out in pj bottoms with trainers?

Sorry but I would absolutely judge you for wearing pyjamas out and about. I prioritise comfort over fashion too, which is why I have several pairs of plain harem trousers, and jogging bottoms to wear with a fitted t shirt and trainers. There is no excuse for being out in your nightwear!

@Chestofdraws

Are your friends and family in their pyjamas when you visit them? Or are they able to get dressed?

I really don’t buy the argument you can’t buy day clothes that are comfortable, I’m sorry. If you can find comfy pyjamas you can find comfy day clothes, even if it’s maternity wear.

But why should I?

@willithappen

Of course it would be a problem for the children mocking, bullying is never okay but ultimately I think your children will be mocked/bullied by others because their mum is always in pjamas. How you present yourself and come across has a huge affect on your children

I would add that other days I turn up dressed very smart for work. It’s not like they never see me setting the “good example”

@Stravaig

It's likely to affect your kids lives sooner or later. They might be teased, or bullied. Or asked if Mum is okay, which will raise the question for them. Or quietly checked on as possible young carers. Doors may be closing for them socially, because other parents will wonder or worry or judge. (Or opening, from other parents who live outwith social convention.)

Just something to be aware of. There's most often a cost extracted for doing our own thing, stepping outside the norm. It may be not be right, or fair, or the way we wish it to be - but it is the world we live in, so it's wise to factor it in, especially when our choices affect others.

OP said she mostly wears loungewear as pyjamas. Would a kid really know the difference and care enough to comment? Or even a parent?

Yes I judge tbh. If it was loose tracie then I wouldn't notice. But slipping about in your fluffy sliders or in a nightgown in sainsburys I cant wrap my head around. I was in a police station and a mum.came in looking for her son in her night gown, floral pjs and slippers. Yes I judged her. I dont think she gave a crap what one thought about her or anything. Each to their own and all that but it wont stop me being judgey. I dont vocalise my thoughts so I can I think as I please.

@cultkid

Yes they are nice aren't they and they are a slim fit round the calf

I do wear crocs and socks and Birkenstock's and socks on the school run

And ridiculous rainbow ugg sandals too

I wear loads of clothes that fit like the Boden pics, the fit is feminine and comfy and you're right a lot of tracksuits are bulky and leggings are too clingy.

If they aren't obviously pyjamas you're fine but wearing something that has sleeping cats on and a dressing gown is a bit embarrassing

Also I am guilty of falling Into the arrogant trap I think because I know I'm not a lay about or rough and I think it's fine for me to rock up to school with bizzarre shoes on or a long and mud covered coat. I never ever ever clean my brand new car or inside it and it's a tip
My hair is wild as well but I wear a full face of makeup.. I do think I get what you're saying about wearing PJs but for your sake and your kids sake just buy some delicate lounge wear.

I also bring hot water bottles to friends houses because I don't think they keep their houses warm enough etc. Wouldn't mind a friend coming to me in Pjs but I would be cringing if they went on the school run in them.

I think I know where you're coming from. In a cringed way I think you're saying you're kind of not a rough person you're quite well off and educated therefore it doesn't matter that you wear pyjamas because you're not a peasant. I don't know any other way of putting it. I'm so embarrassed even typing that 🤣

Nailed it.

Interesting thread.

What are peoples views on someone who does get dressed casually - say jeans and t-shirt, or joggers etc but doesn't do their hair or make-up? I.e they look dishevelled but are wearing clothes

Let's taking raving natural beauties and the young out of the equations and focus on average women 35yrs+

But why should I?

Um, what? You’ve been giving it throughout the thread you only do it becayse your day clothes are so uncomfortable. 😂

Op, wear what you want, but you asked and have the answer, yes, the overwhelming majority of people judge you, either to be lazy/slovenly or mentally unwell. You’re not going to change that opinion. It will be representative of what people who see you think. You clearly asked for a reason and now you know.

🤷‍♀️

But why is it unhygienic?
I treat pyjamas in the same way I treat underwear - I change it every day for hygienic reasons. I also change my bedsheets frequently and change my clothes when I come back from work. It's a personal preference - some people don't mind dirty clothes and messy house, I do. I have high standards but each to their own I guess.

It's grim.

The only time I have seen anyone wearing PJs outside was on a street known locally as “Great Junkie Street”.

@cultkid

Its mind blowing isn't it?

I was as well, before kids. Now it's less important but I do wear some pretty strange combinations and that's partly because I'm socially secure in myself

I went to a private high school and the outfits we wore left a lot to be desired. Free t shirts, broken flip flops, old shorts, jumpers that we found in lost property etc. We were so privileged that the way we looked was NOT important. It wasn't a school of kids wearing a huge Moncler badged coat. I mean we all had really nice things too, but we were not flashy at all. Because we all were so lucky, stuff wasn't a thing for us. We also wore slippers in the school or went barefoot. We were very chilled out.

I think it's a privilege to be able to not give a monkey about wearing some pyjama bottoms to school but 100% there is a "type" who stereotypically wear pyjamas in the playground and I would not put myself in with them. However I wouldn't bat an eyelid at jumping out of the car with crocs and socks on to grab my son from school. Someone in a dressing robe and cat pyjamas would be stared at by me because I would assume they hadn't washed etc or gotten ready for the day.

So do we think that people who are particularly worried about pyjamas are insecure and maybe less socially secure in where they sit in society or what is it? It is a privilege in a way to not give a crap isn't it?

Do you think you're secretly a bit arrogant, like me 😂

Yes. Reading these comments I do think those with the problem are the ones with the insecurities. And yes, I feel privileged to not worry what people think. It’s liberating, especially seeing how much it bothers other people.

As for arrogance. I might have said yes a few pages ago. But I’m not sure that’s the right word. It’s not that I feel more important than others, perhaps more self confident?

@Chestofdraws

But why should I?

Um, what? You’ve been giving it throughout the thread you only do it becayse your day clothes are so uncomfortable. 😂

Op, wear what you want, but you asked and have the answer, yes, the overwhelming majority of people judge you, either to be lazy/slovenly or mentally unwell. You’re not going to change that opinion. It will be representative of what people who see you think. You clearly asked for a reason and now you know.

🤷‍♀️

No, I said that’s part of it

@Jolie12345 I feel privileged to not worry what people think. I think you're kidding yourself here. If you didn't worry about people's opinions you wouldn't post a thread about it.

I wonder how many posters replying imagine the first photo rather than the second, despite OP staring she wears loungewear.

I feel depressed by people wearing jeans to Last Night of the Proms, so yep, pjs outside your house, even in your house post-10am unless you're ill, is pretty rough. Sure, you say you dont care what you look like, so does that extend to not brushing your hair or teeth or washing your face? No, you put make up on, so you care a bit. Pjs look like you've given up.

I was a teacher for 20 years. I worked in the primary sector. Over the years I saw many, many parents who were doing their own thing, paddling their own canoe, not being constrained by the boring norms of societal expectation. All of those parents, without exception, came from conventional families, with mums who picked them up from school on time, dressed in a non "oooo look at me" 'style and behaved in a non chaotic way.They had had the benefit of not standing out, not being picked on , excluded or othered by something their parents had done. The very worst was a mother who was the daughter of aristocratic parents. She had had a great deal of good fortune and privilege in her life. She had 2 sons when I met her. One was in my year 2 class the other was at secondary school with my eldest son. She had decided that living a conventional life was not for her. Washing apparently removed crucial oils from your skin and hair and so must never be done. Her 13 year old son stank. He knew it, everyone knew it. She had the worst BO I have ever smelt on a woman.Her children had a horrendous time at school because of her. You havent quite achieved that level of "oooooo look at meeee I'm above convention and I don't caaaaaaare" but do not underestimate the effect your life choices are having/will have on your children. Seasalt, White Stuff, Toast and many ,many of the pop up shops/market stalls sell tummy skimming tunics soft leggings ,loose dresses. Many ,many British women are your shape. They don't dress as you do.

How long does it take to get dressed? 60 seconds if you stick to elasticated basics, a bit longer if buttons or zips are involved. It's not exactly a huge investment of time. And if your clothes feel consistently uncomfortable, it's usually a sign that you need to shed a bit of weight.

@Jolie12345

I often do the school run or pop to the local shop in the evening in my pyjamas. And I wouldn’t be ashamed to turn up to a friends or families house without putting on proper clothes. I’ve always been more interested in being comfortable than looking my best. I work from home so even if I do get dressed I come back and put pjs back on. Is it just me? Do you judge people who step out in pj bottoms with trainers?

Would you send your kids to school in PJs?

You can buy really nice lounge wear and feminine joggers that don't look like pajamas.
If I saw you out in obvious pj's I'd avoid you and think you probably smelt quite bad. I'll believe you if you say you shower first, but I know the majority of people who go out like this dont. Our local school and shops have banned people going in pj's because of hygiene reasons.

No. Equally I wouldn’t go to work in pjs. But if they wanted to wear a onesie to pop into the co-op with me I wouldn’t care

@ldontWanna

I wonder how many posters replying imagine the first photo rather than the second, despite OP staring she wears loungewear.

Happily change my opinion if OP clarifies but I think we all know which one it probably is otherwise this thread likely wouldn't have been made

It's either she goes out in pyjamas, like the first picture, or she goes out in the clothes (loungewear) she slept in - therefore calling them pyjamas

@SirenSays

You can buy really nice lounge wear and feminine joggers that don't look like pajamas. If I saw you out in obvious pj's I'd avoid you and think you probably smelt quite bad. I'll believe you if you say you shower first, but I know the majority of people who go out like this dont. Our local school and shops have banned people going in pj's because of hygiene reasons.

How can they get away with that?! Surely someone could decide to wear a brand new or just washed pair of jazzy pj bottoms as a fashion statement. And someone else could be wearing jeans that have never been washed covered in god knows what. You’d local School and shops are asking for trouble

Maybe she can clarify.

@Jolie12345 what kind of pj's do you wear outside?

@RitaJosephina

But why is it unhygienic? I treat pyjamas in the same way I treat underwear - I change it every day for hygienic reasons. I also change my bedsheets frequently and change my clothes when I come back from work. It's a personal preference - some people don't mind dirty clothes and messy house, I do. I have high standards but each to their own I guess.

Absolutely, each to their own.

Because, objectively, you know as well as I do, that it's fine. There aren't mass deaths from people wearing PJ's two nights in a row or wearing their clothes to Tesco and also in their lounge.

It's your personal preference, but there is no science to support that you're making a healthier choice.

It might make you feel cleaner, but it doesn't actually have an objective impact on your health or well being. It's just in your head.