*trigger warning sexual harm* totally posting for traffic feeling desperate

[QuestionableDanceMoves]

My 6 year old daughter told me this evening that her 12 year old brother, my son, put his penis in her mouth this afternoon.
Initially he denied it, then said he’d only said it to her as a joke and hadn’t done anything but eventually confessed it was the truth and he had done it
He says he doesn’t know why, they both said it’s never happened before, he said he knew it was wrong to do it but did it anyway.
Their father, my exh, was emotionally and physically abusive towards me when we were together, we’ve been apart for 4 years now, which my son witnessed. He had some counselling in the initial aftermath of his father leaving but has always struggled with his emotions and anger and often says he feels out of control.

I don’t know what to do. I told my daughter she did the absolute right thing by telling me. There’s only me and the 2 kids, I have no one else. I don’t want his life to be ruined but I know this behaviour can’t go unchecked, he needs help
How do I get it for him? What do I do? I can’t believe he’s done this

Just wanted to add my voice to those supporting you, as well. They are both your children and needing your support, you are doing all the right things. Just stay the course, OP. One day at a time. I can't imagine how hard this must be for you, but I think you've done so well. Those who have been in your house, know all the details, are trained in their professions and have a lot of experience in all of this, are in a much better place to lead and guide you through this, rather than random strangers on the internet.

I'm sending you a strong supportive hand hold, I'm so sorry you're going through this, I really hope you all get through and past this episode without too much pain.

I have been following the whole thread since you posted a couple of days ago.
I think you are amazing for having the relationships you do with your children and not brushing this under the carpet.
What a strong woman you are and a great Mum.

OP is an AMASING mother you've 100% done the right thing! You have to go with the advice of the professionals it's not the first time they've dealt with this kind of issue and won't be the last! With the right help and support your little family will be okay praying for you all

OP just wanted to say how brave and strong I think you've been throughout this, you've gone down all the right channels and done right by both your babies. I hope you feel supported too

Thanks again everyone, I do appreciate the support. I’ve only told one person in real life as I don’t want people to change the way they look at both the kids.
Both their schools have been informed, I’ve had another 2 social workers round today who have carried out further assessments and my son is still allowed to remain living with us, him being removed from my care was not even suggested- I just need to carry on as I have been eg not leaving them alone

There is going to be a child in need meeting at some point to discuss next steps, further help etc

I’m still awaiting a call from the police with regards to whether he’s getting a caution or not.

You are doing brilliantly, OP.

Op you’re doing amazing. This thread as plagued my thoughts the last 2 days, you’ve dealt with it in a much better way then I think I would have x

Hey op, delurking to say you are doing great. I have absolutely no idea how I would have reacted.

Have you managed to get some decent sleep? Try listening to some (I find the rainforest works for me), meditation (there are good apps to help you) if nothing works I'd consider taking some sleeping tabs.

@QuestionableDanceMoves this a really difficult situation and my heart goes out to you. I think it’s best if you continue as best you can what your Son did was terrible but I don’t think your daughter will be affected for the rest of her life at all. To separate the children would cause major issues long term for both children and it’s easier for us MNers to say what we would do but we aren’t in your shoes. It’s about balance you’ve had a discussion with your Son and I hope your daughter is doing ok.

OP you are doing really well. None of us on here would know what to do. The OP is now following advice from the professionals. When reading your initial post I thought I really would not know what to do.

I think you've done fantastic and moved fast to get help and support for all of you