my MIL slapped my child + told me

[hermykne]

they were spoilt.
not in material goods but in how i treat them.

its one day later and i am still quite hurt about her saying this to me and for slapping ds. DD got very upset when she did it to ds.
i was out food shopping.

basically she said a good sla p would stop the antics of a nearly 5 and 3 yr old.

i feel i can withdraw or send her a note, as a friend suggested. not good face to face.

I so wasn't going to post here but.....

I just feel it only fair to point out that Kittywits was calling Cowardice precious for waling out when her FIL called her son a "bad boy". She was not calling hermykne precious for being upset about her MIL.

Walking

a small smack kitty maybe I could agree with (not over socks though) but I could not under any circumstaces ever agree to anyone dealing out a punishment like that to any off my children but me

I know this sounds hypocritcal
If my child was that much of a pain that my MIL smacked them I wouldnt let them go back again and I would tell my MIL that to

Precious here then and have never been called that before

ghosty. don't feel sorry for my kids, they have a rich and wonderful life. I don't know if it was me or not. I tend to steer clear of smacking threads. The arguments are tedious and predictable.

'a good slap would stop the antics of a nearly 5 and 3 yr old'

that is what was in the OP. mil obviously like to give a 'good slap' that is not a light tap is it?

sign me up for Preciousnet too.

agree with ragdollyanna

Yes dg, thank you, that is what I was saying. I don't really agree with walking out, not very adult.
What I am saying is that a smack isn't the end of the world. It seems that your mil was peed off with the fact that he wouldn't do what he was told, that's the issue she has. In many ways it doesn't matter wahat he wouldn't do. She is his grandmother and she should be shown respect.

Troll alert for kittywits

shown respect by a 3 and 5 year old
don't think a MIL will earn respect from her grandchildren if she slaps them and tells them they are spoilt

No excuse for smacking a small child. I still find it amazing that if you smack an adult it's assualt but if you smack a small and defenseless child it's "parenting" and deemed ok by some.

Ha, ha starfish you're barking up the wrong tree there!

LL, I hadn't noticed her 'you're all too prescious' comment before I posted.

Merely wanted to point out that she hadn't accused the OP of cowardice, but was directing a statement at her.

Yes, it was me she was calling precious.

I don't like my son called names. And forgive me if I feel like that.

Would you like your son told he was bad? He wasn't bad.

Kittywits.. how would you feel if someone slapped your children? We don't have to be against slapping/smacking to be annoyed/angry at someone else slapping our children.

If not wanting people to call my son names, or slap him, make me precious, then so be it.

Of course they should show respect. Bloody hell, I wouldn't want to try and look after children of that age if they were brought up with the ethos that at three and five they were too young to show 'respect'
She is their elder, their grandmother, she deserves to be shown respect.
God do you lot live in a 'kids rule ok' world, That scares me and is asking for trouble.

And whether walking out is adult like or not, I don't give a shit what you think.

Would you stand by and listen to a grown adult call your child bad? Because I wouldn't. And didn't. The fact of the matter was, he had said it before and I told him I didn't like it. Why make a child think they are bad?

Sorry, this is not usually my posting name, I changed it for a personal thread.

Will change back later. Apologies for the confusion.

young or old people have to earn respect
i think it is a crappy lesson to teach kids they have to respect people just because they are older than them
there are plenty of unpleasant older people who behave badly

I find it unbelievable that anyone in the 21st century still believes in any form of corporal punishment. I am truly shocked.

Nah, kittywits isn't a troll. Why do you say that? Because she expresses an alternative view to your own? I know Mumsnet is strongly anti-smacking and I tend towards anti-smacking myself, but I have smacked in the past and have also forgiven my MIL for smacking my children when she had care of them too.

I do not mean this as a comment about any poster here in particular, but I do agree with Kittywits in that I think a lot of parents are too precious about their own children. We have a problem in society at the moment. No-one dares to reprimand a child for misbehaviour for fear of parental retribution and yet our society is marred by disrespectful, anti-social behaviour by teenagers.

I am not saying the answer is smacking. I agree hermykne should express her feelings to her MIL and ask her not to smack again, but I also think she should have words with her son about doing as his grandmother asked him to do.