How soon did you leave newborn with someone else overnight?

[Dontbsicily]

Hello!

I have a beautiful 5 week old baby girl and my mum has offered to take her tomorrow night overnight so that DP and I can go for a meal and a couple of drinks. I’d love to spend some time with DP as we seem to be like passing ships in the night at the moment but, I don’t know if I’m ready to leave my baby yet.

She is combination fed. I tend to breastfeed the majority of the time but, then give her a bottle if we are out and about or DP will give her a couple of bottles on a night to give me a break. My Mum and sister also bottle fed her and looked after her through the night one evening to allow me a full nights sleep and she was absolutely fine so I have no doubts she would be again, I just don’t know how I feel about being in a different house all together!

How long after giving birth did you leave your babies and how was it?

Thanks in advance! :)

14m as I went into hospital to have my ds and my mum looking after my dd for 2 nights whilst I was in.

Never since although we are considering it next year for a couple of nights so we can go on honeymoon.

Do what's right for you. When they're tiny they're more likely to accept having a bottle of milk and be easier to settle by rocking/singing etc than as a toddler who's screaming for "mummy" and won't be reasoned with

6 weeks with DC1, followed by another overnight at 8 weeks.

Worked well for us. I was desperate for some time away and she had a lovely time with grandma

Huge eye roll at some of these posters.
OP, do whatever feels comfortable to you! There’s absolutely nothing wrong with leaving your LO with her gmother, how lovely for them both to spend quality time together. If you prefer to take it step by step that makes sense but please do not compare yourself to some of these posters who won’t leave their children for years & years. It sounds like you’re a very calm, considerate and loving mummy, hats off to you.

2year old haven’t left her overnight, I have had evenings out and to me that is sufficient.

@Dontbsicily Please just do what you want to do and feel comfortable with. I know you wanted opinions but actually everyone is different and what someone else did isn't really a lot of use to you.

If you don't want to be away from her overnight then don't. Don't feel pressured by your partner if it's not what you want.

But equally, please don't feel guilty If you do want to do this, go for it. Yes there are people who haven't left ever had a night away but that doesn't mean they shouldn't have. She'll be fine, she's already settled overnight with your mum and she's reliably taking a bottle which is brilliant.

What do YOU want to do?

2yo.

A 17 year old that has never spent a night away from home? Is that a typo

No.

We have no family and he sees friends and goes to work but where would he go to spend a night away.

Doesn't he ever go out with friends? Never went on any cub camps or school trips?

He goes out with friends but not overnight anywhere, he is only 17 so not really allowed in hotels.

Never done cubs and he was Home Schooled so “school trips” involved me and I don’t think we ever had reason to stay away

18 months with the youngest. I was absolutely miserable. If it's your mum I don't see an issue at all.

My mum had my dd overnight when she was 2 weeks old but that was because I was in hospital having emergency surgery and there was no partner/father on the scene!!

I can't remember when dd first spent a night away from me in a different house (I lived with my mum when dd was a baby) she would probably have been 3-4 years old!!

If it doesn't feel right that's reason enough not to do it, just go out for dinner for a couple of hours and then pick her up.

Never overnight. First time DD stayed anywhere overnight was at 18 months and that’s been the only time. We’ve left her with grandparents during the day and for an evening but always gone and picked her up around 11ish. We left her 6-11 (I think) when she was around 5 weeks old.

About 3 years for dc1 and about 3 months for dc2

8 weeks with my parents as I totally trusted them with him

10 months to go to a good friends wedding, then uhm 19 months to go to hospital to have dc2. 😜

Dd2 6 weeks when we went to a wedding. You will get many answers. If you are happy and baby is with loving relatives that's all that's needed

My dd is 22 months and still not left her x

My first was left overnight at 7 months, then not until almost 2. My second has never been left over night and is 21 months!

About 4 weeks with my first. With my mum who I trust more than myself tbh. She loved him and would take good care of him. 100% trusted her from day one. I found it hard going from no children to 24/7 mummy (I know that's what happens but it was intense and a shock to the system. Think I was a bit silly first time round and had an unprepared romantic view of motherhood). I needed a night off. She wanted to have him. He was going to be well looked after whoever he was with. Everyones a winner. No right or wrong. If it works for u do it.

@Myshinynewname noticed the dc2 came along 9 months after the night out

oops!

braces self for uproar

DP and I went out for a meal and a few drinks and my little girl spent the night with my mum and dad.

Why did I come to this decision?

Well I had decided that we would go for a meal and they stay at my parents with our baby girl but, DP said he wanted me to let my hair down and enjoy myself and he said I wouldn’t be able to do this if we were going back to her. He said ‘you will just want to get straight back to her and you won’t have a drink’ which was totally correct and my parents absolutely adore my baby and she adores them. My mum is brilliant with her. Bring a ftm, I had no idea how to settle her or what positions helped with tummyache, mum showed me all of that. I had a c section so mum took time off work to help me so my baby is totally familiar with my mum and regularly settles for her for me.

She was an absolute angel. She had a little fuss from 10pm for a couple of hours which she does every night and then she slept from 1am - 5am, woke for a change and feed and then slept until almost 10am! That’s the best night she has ever had! I assume that being only bottle fed for the evening assisted with this.

However, I missed her terribly. I had a lovely time with DP and it was great to spend some time with him as, we have barely had a full conversation since our angel arrived but, I felt really embarrassed when DP told someone we have a 5 week old baby (I think this was largely due to the reaction this post received tbh!) and I woke up at 6am and immediately rang my mum to check on my baby girl and when I heard her burst out crying (hormones!) because I really did miss her so much.

I think she was totally ready to be away from me but, I’m hindsight I wasn’t ready to be away from her. I am feeling very guilty that I can’t bf her and I haven’t put her down all day. On the other hand, I feel this has helped me to get over this hurdle and now I know that I’m not bothered about going out again anytime soon and I am also even less interested in having a drink. Although, being a ftm, I would have never been able to know this without trying and I’m still learning every day but, I do think I’m doing a pretty good job and I’m sorry if it upsets anyone that I left her overnight but she was very safe and she is very very loved by my lovely supportive parents.

X

Glad you had a nice time.
You can breastfeed her today, there is absolutely no issue with doing so.

You're allowed to breastfeed after drinking as the level of alcohol in your milk is the level in your blood- absolutely miniscule.