Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Is six children too many ?

594 replies

mozhe · 21/05/2007 17:09

Someone,( a colleague..but I do not know them well ), just stopped me in the corridor at work...noticing I was pregnant they asked me if it was my first, when I told them ,' no, it's my 6th '...they said,' six is too many ', and strod off....Is six too many ?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
TheodoresMummy · 22/05/2007 20:51

kittyhas6 - can you go into a bit more detail with regards to your last post (being a better Mum of 6 than...etc) - I do like a bit of detail .

Not that the OP gives a toss by now I shouldn't think, but I hope to be blessed with a BIG famiy. I am 1 of 4 and love every get together we have. I don't think that 6 is that many. If you had asked about 16 kids then maybe I would see why some people were a bit .

Don't get why everyone was sooooo nasty at the start of this thread...? Why is it any different to have 6 children and work and have a nanny than 1 ?

kittyhas6 · 22/05/2007 21:15

Theodoresmummy, I shall be delighted to enlighten you
I am a better mum of 6 than of 1,2, or 3 because:
I haven't got the time to worry and stress about things that I did when I only had three.
I, like many mums would worry about (for example) how much so and so had eaten, I would stress about aspects of their development, should they be doing this and that, should they have reached this developmental milestone, be speaking fluent spanish and french and giving cello recitals (get my drift?)

Now I don't sweat the small stuff. Big issues get dealt with and I know from experience that things mostly work out fine without fuss and worry, for example dd2 (3 1/2) still wets herself once a day and is still in nappies at night. If I had fewer children I might be tempted to do something about this. Now I know it's not worth the stress it will cause me and her and that it will see itself right soon enough. Ther are lots of examples like this.

Because there are alot of children the children have to take responsibilty for themselves in a way I wouldn't have insisted on had I had fewer.
They have to tidy up after themselves (Well I keep trying!!)
They have a responsibilty to keep the house in reasonable order and to help me out. I think this sets them up better for life than having a mum who does it all just because it's quicker for her to do it.

When I tell them to do something they HAVE to do it, otherwise it's chaos. I think I would have let them get away with a lot more had there been fewer of them.

Sorry, I've rambled in a rather incoherent way, screaming newborn has done me in .

Basically I have to run a tight ship.

They get more freedom also from not having me focus on them all the time and what they are up to. They get to chill out and just relax as I'm not in a position to 'stimulate' their minds, and do all the extra curicular stuff many mums feel impelled to do now.

Well, I've made no sense I fear. I know what I mean though!!

Zola78 · 22/05/2007 21:39

I think that you have made perfect sense, Kittyhas6. You make it sound like a nice thing to have a lot of children rather than a chore.

I agree with you on many points even though I've just got two. Going from 1 to 2 I had to stop obsessing which actually me chill out as a parent. I think that in many ways I'm better now for having2. I hope number 3 doesn't rock the boat too much

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

MrsSnoek · 22/05/2007 21:55

Kittyhas6- I do assume you stay at home and raise your kids yourself, right?

Mozhe- is full time working mother that seems to dislike and have very low opinions of women who decide to raise their kids herselves by compromising their careers and income.

Kitty you sound like a very lovely person and come accross as a very gentle character not like Mozhe.

Judging by the potst you both write I' rather by your child than hers!

kittyhas6 · 22/05/2007 22:35

That's very kind of you! yes, I do stay at home full time to bring up the children. I also have family support, so there are plenty of caring adukts for the children to trun too.

MrsSnoek · 22/05/2007 22:38

You are very welcome! Very very very impressive! Your children are very lucky!

Keep it up!

lilmamma · 22/05/2007 22:40

why have so many children and then go to work full time all day ? surely until the child starts school,the mother should be there.personally i cant see the point and then does the working parent take all the credit for the child someone else is raising ? Its like getting a brand new car and giving it to someone else to drive,and then maybe having it yourself the odd evening..

OtterInnit · 22/05/2007 22:40

i am a sahm with no help or family - does that make me bad

kittyhas6 · 22/05/2007 22:40
Smile
TheodoresMummy · 22/05/2007 22:40

Thanks kittyhas6.

kittyhas6 · 22/05/2007 22:41

no, it makes you up against it and in need of a pampering day at a luxury spa!

OtterInnit · 22/05/2007 22:55

i dont mind kitty - though my parents were evil - my children (only 5 of them) are sweet and lovely

kittypants · 22/05/2007 23:00

nothing wrong with 6.

SueBaroo · 22/05/2007 23:03

otterinnit, me too, solidarity, sista and all that. Mind you, I only have 4. tiny family, us.

Actually, not being sarky there at all, I have friends with a lot more, and do feel like a small family. I think the house would echo if I just had the one...

mozhe · 22/05/2007 23:38

Mrs snoek & lilmama....do you think my children are lucky ? Am I impressive ? And should I keep up the good work ?
btw kitty a lot of what you were saying resonated with me....we probably have similar styles of parenting
Children aren't cars.

OP posts:
3flightsofstairs · 23/05/2007 00:02

Not trying to be funny, mozhe, but are you a real person?

OtterInnit · 23/05/2007 00:05

mohze i do think you should keep up the good work but from what igather that has very little to with mothering

handlemecarefully · 23/05/2007 00:10

snort!

mozhe · 23/05/2007 00:11

Yes ! Are you ? And my lifestyle has plenty to do with mothering...( am sitting at computer with DD firmly clamped to left breast AND with my foot on the kettle to keep it on continuous boil, so room gets nice and steamy...croup)...imo wohms are the uber-multitaskers

OP posts:
mozhe · 23/05/2007 00:13

Not croup is it HMC....come into my fuggy study...[ beckoning emoticon]

OP posts:
OtterInnit · 23/05/2007 00:17

milk does not a mother make

handlemecarefully · 23/05/2007 00:17

I'm a bit too old for croup I think....

mozhe · 23/05/2007 00:23

What then otter ? glueing yourself to your child for next 18 years....never spending a moment apart ? Who knows....?

OP posts:
3flightsofstairs · 23/05/2007 00:25

I wasn't being nasty, I just don't know anyone (who's real and not just having a laugh) who would antagonise so many people when they don't appear to care what others think anyway! Unless they reinforce your own opinion, of course...
Genuinely baffled.

KerryMum · 23/05/2007 00:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.