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Original poster

my neighbour assaulted my 5 year old!!!!

352 replies

hangingbyathread · 16/10/2006 16:18

saturday my dd was playing out front with the group when my neighbour in opposite house was coming back from the shop,my dd&her friend were standing in her way like kids do arms spread ect,she told my dd to move,when she didnt move she got her arm&shoved her out the way&my dd landed backwards in a bush,i have contacted the police&they have logged it as assault but now monday they still havnt come apparently they are "busy",iam fuming,i want to hit her but i know i will be arrested if i do,also what has upset me is i thought my friend&neighbour who dd plays with was my friend&to me loyalty is a big part of friendship but my friend has still carried on as normal,not stuck up for my dd&if it was me i would make it clear to the assaulter it is wrong to do that to a child(as i have said to her but got no response)also the problem i have now is my dd5 wants to go play out the front but i have tried explaining to her she cant until the police has been as the person may hurt her again as she obviouly thinks she"s got away with it as she has been sniggering&making gestures at me on the school run,what do i do iam so upset

OP posts:
HumphreyComfreyCushion · 16/10/2006 16:20

I can imagine your DD was very scared.

Was she physically hurt by this neighbour?

HuwEdwards · 16/10/2006 16:23

puhing her into a bush is bad and sniggering and making gestures very childish. Why did your daughter not move when asked?

Original poster
hangingbyathread · 16/10/2006 16:27

my dd is 5 she&her friend was playing a silly game of whats the password,she twisted her ankle but wasnt injured bad but its not the point,if the bush hadnt been there she coudve landed on concrete&been killed,your not allowed to harm your own kids so why does someone think they can harm anothers

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Original poster
hangingbyathread · 16/10/2006 16:32

the person who did this to my dd is 28!!!!

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lulumama · 16/10/2006 16:43

ok - well, any 28 year old who shoves a child out of the way in response to a childish game is bang out of order.

have you been round and spoken to them? do they know you have reported it to the police?

her sniggering might be embarassment, especially if she had no idea you have involved the police , in which case i imagine she would be mortified.

i am sure she did not mean to harm your child - but shoving her was wrong....

what do you want the police to do ? arrest her ? charge her? you say your daughter wasn't injured....

you talk about loyalty - but sounds like you have forgotten about the friendship in the heat of the moment by involving the police...IMO...

sorry if that sounds harsh, but i would not have called the police....

Ladymuck · 16/10/2006 16:47

What is it that you are expecting the police to do?

moljam · 16/10/2006 16:47

i think you are right to have complained to police,id be fuming.if as a parent you had done that ,theyd be uproar!

Original poster
hangingbyathread · 16/10/2006 16:53

sorry a bit muddled there,the person that pushed my dd is not a friend i was saying my friend who plays with my dd has shown no loyalty,what do i want the police to do?go&tell her she is out of order for doing this,tell her it is not allowed&apologise to my dd,i did go to her house&she wouldnt come to the door but opened the window,i said did u push dd she said yes she wouldnt move&shut the winodow,i then saw her in the street yesterday&said i hope you dont think you have got awy with it i have contatcted the police,my dd is here in tears as she cant play out!!!!

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Original poster
hangingbyathread · 16/10/2006 16:53

what upsets me is if i go&hit her id be arressted pronto

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Pinotmum · 16/10/2006 16:56

This woman shouldn't have pushed your child but I would have spoken to her first. Your child and her group were playing on the street and preventing someone passing by even though the person asked them to move. If she'd have had bags of shopping or needed the loo I can see how the funny side of this game could have passed her by. I wouldn't have pushed your child but I would have been very annoyed at not being allowed to pass by.

moljam · 16/10/2006 16:56

dont hit her,thats probably what she wants and how would that look to your dd,violence does not solve violence.does she have any children?

Original poster
hangingbyathread · 16/10/2006 16:56

lulumama so you would be happy for me to come shove your kids if they are in my way?

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lulumama · 16/10/2006 16:57

but why would you hit her?

that;s the point.....you say your daughter was pushed , but not injured...you could have told her it was unacceptable, the police are not going to waste time going round to have a word, as that is all you want them to do.

she is 28 ,she knows it was wrong...

she is not a serial offender....she acted badly, and like many people, won;t say sorry.....involving the police makes an awkward situation worse....

i do feel for you and understand your anger, but the police takes this to a whole other level...

how did she respond when you said you had called the police...

moljam · 16/10/2006 16:57

agree,theres no excuse for pushing a child!

Original poster
hangingbyathread · 16/10/2006 16:58

i did speak to her&she blanked me,im not going to hit her as dh says then i would get charged but iam dissapointed at the police not coming round as ive always had faith in them&taught dd to but where are they when she/i need them

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Original poster
hangingbyathread · 16/10/2006 16:59

well she blanked me so no she doesnt know its wrong&by doing nothing lets her see it is right,if the police say its assault its assault

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lulumama · 16/10/2006 16:59

No, i wouldnt be happy......but i wouldn;t call the police

i would have a word with you there and then and tell you in no uncertain terms that it is not acceptable and demand an apology to me and my child...

i said in my first post it is bang out of order...

if your child had been shoved, kicked ,and hurt, then yes, call the police..

Original poster
hangingbyathread · 16/10/2006 17:00

i said she took her arm&shoved her into a bush backwards on her arse

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lulumama · 16/10/2006 17:01

she blanked you - she is embarrassed and ashamed and trying to put a front up.....i do honestly understand your anger and would be furious myself...

Ladymuck · 16/10/2006 17:02

Well you are going to have to live opposite this woman for some time, so I would be looking for ways either to improve the situation or ensure that it doesn't repeat itself. Clearly you have with the second: keeping your dd with you, or at least off the street, is probably best until she can pick up on the social cues. You've preusmably already made your point to the woman, so I'm not actually sure what more the police are going to do. IME these situations can deteriorate quite quickly with both parties trying to catch each other out.

I would think through what example you want to give your dd.

lulumama · 16/10/2006 17:03

'she twisted her ankle but wasnt injured bad '

not being picky - but that is what you said.....i am glad she wasn;t hurt badly... i would be furious if it had happened to one of my children...but i don;t agree with the police being involved... that;s all.....

Original poster
hangingbyathread · 16/10/2006 17:03

so me&dd have done nothing wrong yet iam the one who is sniggered at,at the school&dd left inddors as she feels unsafe to play out

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moaningpaper · 16/10/2006 17:04

Your child was blocking the pavement to a stranger and physically preventing them from moving, even when asked, and the stranger got annoyed (understandable) and over-reacted (shoved her out of the way). It was not a great response but I assume she is only human. Personally I think you need to have a word with your child, not your neighbour. Agressively trying to block members of the public from walking down the street is rather stupid to say the least.

lulumama · 16/10/2006 17:05

yes - and that is horrible-- why not go and try and talk over a cup of tea and explain that your daughter is 5, and would like her to feel comforable playing out - and assure each other that your daughter will keep out of her way and this woman will never lay a finger on your DD ever again?

there is a lot to be gained by settling these sorts of things as amicably as possible...

Pinotmum · 16/10/2006 17:06

We have had the police calling on the parents of the children who play on our road to ask them to keep their children from disturbing the other residents. My children are too young to play on the road and I wouldn't be keen even when they are older tbh.

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