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Original poster

My neighbours are ar**holes...... had to call the police

230 replies

sparklymieow · 10/05/2005 17:57

went to my mum's to sort out their internet and got a call from my DH, very shaken and he said that the neighbours had been round and threaten him and were standing outside and not to come home I phoned the police from my mums and came straight home, I leaped out and told my neighbour that he had no right to threaten anyone and to make them feel like this, he called me a thing and that I should just get into my 'dirty' house.... my mum got out and said to him that she was sorry for shouting over the fence on sunday and that the arguement was with her and not us.... he told us to get off 'his' garden (not his its his parents house) and started to push me, at which point my dad jumped between us, and he said that he would flatten my dad!!! I said the plice were on their way, and he said that if they did come I wouldn't be living here much longer....... I went into the house and phoned the council and said that I want to make a complaint about the neighbours. The police turned up then and spoke to us, they had already been next door, and he said that they had missed out lots of information, I went and got the kids from scool whil the police were next door and broke down in the office...... I jus want a quiet life, wh is it that wherever I go, there is trouble

OP posts:
hub2dee · 12/05/2005 11:17

Yes, I think a GP would come round if they feel it is serious / warranted / only way to treat someone. Perhaps you could negotiate a visit after 5:30 - maybe that is easier for the GP ?

However, it may be better to face up to the fear, and for him to feel he can leave the house...

I can't advise as I really don't know if this would put you / him in danger... sorry, you will have to make a call on that.

Perhaps your folks could pop round - safety in numbers and all ?

Original poster
sparklymieow · 12/05/2005 13:04

Dh just had a go at me I want to get out the house and him to come with me, they aren't there and he won't....... because they threaten him and not me.. tho they did threaten me too.......

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hub2dee · 12/05/2005 13:33

It's natural he's scared. It's not a nice situation.

It's important, however, that you fight this as a team. You really need to agree a strategy about what you want to do, and work towards it together. There's no point in taking the hate and violence thrown at you and letting it create tension between you two...

Hope you can agree a way forward, and work at it together.

I've said it before, but the police should be called to report this stuff, and if necessary provide safe escort. I have no idea if this is a service they can offer, but I suspect so. Ape man and his mates will be LESS not MORE likely, IMHO to do anything if they know you have no hesitation to call the police.

It is a tough call though as obviously you fear making the situation worse.

Be strong, and take care - both of you.

NomDePlume · 12/05/2005 13:35

how awful, sparkly,iwishihadbetter advice

sorry,vbrokenspacebar

Freckle · 12/05/2005 13:46

Speak to the police and demand that they charge apeman with assault. Note that an assault does not necessarily mean that there has been any physical contact. It can be purely a threatening gesture. If someone threatens to hurt you and makes any threatening gesture towards you, this constitutes assault - the physical contact makes up the battery part of assault and battery. The person making the gesture must be in a position to carry it out, e.g. if someone is behind bars and threatens to hit you making a punching gesture, this would not be assault as he cannot physically carry out the threat. However, if he is standing a few feet away and does this, it constitutes assault as there is a real possibility that he will carry out the threat.

Keep notes of all and every incident, no matter how minor and, if there is any such threatening behaviour, do call the police. At the very least you will eventually have irritant value to the local plods who will do something to stop having to come out to you.

coppertop · 12/05/2005 14:18

The one thing the police told us off for (in a nice way) was for not calling them out each time there was an incident. Your call is automatically logged and the police can use each incident number as proof to add to the file. Also make sure you mention any SN that your children have. The police actually took notes about ds1 and ds2's ASD.

hub2dee · 12/05/2005 14:20

Thanks for the clarification on A&B, Freckle.

If what freckle says is correct, sparkly, you already have several incidents worth cataloging / reporting.

I can't really see another option...

(Aside from pushing forward with a re-house, should this be your desired outcome).

Apes like that both scare me and make me furious. The little f**ker.

Original poster
sparklymieow · 12/05/2005 15:51

thanks for all your advice, have spoken to SS and she is going to speak to the housing officer tomorrow, about getting us out into any house, and someone will be coming to assess DS and DD1s housing needs.

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hub2dee · 12/05/2005 16:13

brill. This might not be your 'ideal scenario' (in which apeman gets attacked in the night and gets confused for a terrorist only to disappear under, ahem, 'police custody' for 15 years), but it will hopefully mean you and your family will be safe, which is the most important thing.

I am sure that you will be able to persuade them to make emergency modifications to the house, or get them sorted yourself.

Carry on being determined, sparkly !

misdee · 12/05/2005 18:23

i'm sure you'll muddle thro for a while with no adaptations. take the spare hand rail rom the stairs with you, and ther grab bars if you can. the main adaption is the the downstairs loo and shower room, but i'm sure you can manage with out one for a while. peartree houses have downstairs loos. {{{{{{hugs}}}}}}

Original poster
sparklymieow · 12/05/2005 19:03

have to phone the homeless dept. tomorrow to see what they suggest

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hub2dee · 12/05/2005 19:13

don't stop supermieow ! Make it happen !

Original poster
sparklymieow · 12/05/2005 19:16

feels like I have been on the phone all day

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misdee · 12/05/2005 19:21

if u get no joy ask to speak to mr woodhead i think his name was.

Original poster
sparklymieow · 12/05/2005 19:27

housing officer did say it was only one incident and that he can't move us on one incident...

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hub2dee · 12/05/2005 19:27

Make the telephone your best friend. And also write letters where needed.

Don't stop.

DH any better ? Tell him he owes you a massage at least.

Maybe I should book that limo and those strippers, but a little birdy tells me you and misdee have started SMOKING AGAIN.

Original poster
sparklymieow · 12/05/2005 19:28

well, I think in this situation I am allowed

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hub2dee · 12/05/2005 19:44

LOL@ your soft fruit. Raspberries, BTW.

Sounds like there have been several incidents. EACH verbal assault is an incident. EACH threat is an incident.

GET ONTO YOUR GP. Maybe dh needs ad's ???? Get a statement from your GP to help you. That may well help your case with these various housing officers. Report to the police to generate crime numbers. These may help with your housing officers...

GO SPARKLY GO !

misdee · 12/05/2005 19:48

eh i havent had one for weeks now?

Blu · 12/05/2005 20:06

Mieow, this sounds v horrible. I remember when I read the first thread, I thought hmmm lifting weights all day - he is probably on steroids, which can make people very very moody, touchy and aggressive.
Don't suppose this helps, or know how it might influence the police etc - but it would iply that he can't act rationally, and therefore there can be NO guarantees that he won't stop it, and should therefore be kicked out!

hub2dee · 12/05/2005 20:16

Sorry, misdee, my mistake. That's great !!!

misdee.... I know I keep on at ya. Hope it keeps you on yer toes and not too angry. Only cos I care. X

Original poster
sparklymieow · 12/05/2005 22:51

would the courts make the sons move out, rather than the parents???

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Evesmama · 12/05/2005 22:53

think the son was doing my garden this afternoon!

or maybe theres more idiots like him around

how are you feeling?

Original poster
sparklymieow · 12/05/2005 22:56

drained..... feeling all sorts of emotions, sick, scared, part of me is saying stay here and fight, another part is saying move to another house in the area, and another is saying 'just move to Bolton and start all over' and i'm very tearful,

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Original poster
sparklymieow · 12/05/2005 23:05

DH wants to put things into storage now...

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