Rude Step Children

[Thehappy]

Hi, I am new to this and o am after some advice.
i have been with my partner eight years, we have been a blended family for seven.
I find his kids to be rude to me for no reason at all.
they come into the house and totally ignore me, they don't say hello, good ye or goodnight to me. Or my two children who live with us permanently.
i have the children while my partner works one week after school and the next I get them up and ready for school. I can not drop them or collect them from school but I can get them to bed and get them up for school.
i book, wash, clean their bedroom, iron their clothes, do their school lunches. Weekly for them and I feel quite upset that this keeps happening.I have them more than their dad most of the time.
I have addressed this before with my partner and I have again today. His response was oh i will speak to them. I don't feel like it should be me bringing this to his attention. He was aware they had walked into the house and went straight upstairs knowing I was on the kitchen.
Am I being over sensitive.
The children are 9 and 10. So for me this is basic manners, my children are older and have never not greeted anyone or used their manners. Maybe it's me. Help it is really getting me down where I am losing patience with the situation

Well done. You've done the hardest part by setting out your boundaries and telling it straight. This is a really positive step forward.

You need to work on the guilt issue. It's typical of us women to feel awful when we set boundaries for ourselves. It's the way we're raised, to be the servants and being told we're less important than the men. Well fuck that for a game of marbles. Channel your inner warrior woman. Take no prisoners. This gets easier with practice (and easier still when you get a bit older and have no fucks left to give!).

Next stage is to stand firm and not budge one inch. You already know that if you give an inch, he/they will take a mile.

It is not for you to shoulder his responsibilities, and if that leads to him having to pay higher child support, then that's his issue, not yours.

If he says "it will take a while to sort out so can you just..." give him a firm no. The new regime has already started and there will be no back tracking.

The 4K he had from you for his legal bill is pretty outrageous, but you can tackle that with him another time. This is money he has taken from you and your children. He will need to replace it, as he promised to do. (I was also a single parent with not one penny of child support so I have walked in your shoes. I was also a step parent.)

Good morning @Thehappy - how did last week go with the new regime?

So it sounds like he got the extra contact to reduce his child support liability and then dumped the kids on you?

poor kids and poor you.

Are you financially able to leave?