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Original poster

Probably Make Me Unpopular but......

170 replies

mumtochloe · 12/10/2004 11:39

Has anyone else not enjoyed a MN meetup? I went to one a while ago - no names or places mentioned - and apart from two lovely ladies who I only got talking to at the end, Ifound everyone very unfriendly and cliquey. Everyone knew each other already and sat in their little groups ignoring everyone else. Another lady like me was sat on her own the whole time too and funny enough has not been back on here since.
It broke my heart that DD seemed to suffer too as some of the adults were playing a game of rounders and ignored her too in favour of the kids they had met before.

Don't get me wrong - I have seen some fantastic, hertwarming posts on here numerous times, and I will continue to post, but I for one will not be going to another. It was worse than NCT!

Does everyone hate me now?

PS, and no I am not a troll. Just want to hear if it is just me

OP posts:
jodee · 13/10/2004 21:45

I have finally forgiven you, Soupie!

Original poster
mumtochloe · 14/10/2004 11:31

Gosh - I was not expecting so many replies but was expecting a few rants

A big thank you to anyone who has replied, its nice to feel wanted again lol

Mum to chloe x

OP posts:
Ronniebaby · 14/10/2004 12:08

MumtoChloe

I've been to quite a few, I've never not enjoyed it, altho when I have DS it makes it hard to chat as I'm watching him all the time, but I at least say hi to newcomers and try to grab 5 mins chat to make them feel at ease, but it aint easy.

As Jampot said we meet up on an evening, NO KIDS, we sit and have a meal, some drink etc, and it's nie and chilled that way we dont feel like we are leaving anyone out. Altho as Jampot said both myself and her are chatterboxes and can take over, but I had awkward silences so talk for England.

If someone starts a convo we let them finish their piece before we launch in.

It is a shame you didnt enjoy your meet up. I felt like that when I went to a Moms&baby group when DS was 6 wks old, but I thought to myself f**k it I'll go back again and did and made quite a few mates, so try again and bit your tongue and get in there, there may be someone just waiting to chat to you.

prettycandles · 14/10/2004 14:16

I went to a meetup once and no-body else turned up. I was so gutted that I didn't Mumsnet for a week or so, then I thought to myself 'What the heck, it probably wasn't personal so just chalk it up to experience and go back online to enjoy Mumsnet herself.'

codswallop · 14/10/2004 14:16

the voice of reason pc

prettycandles · 14/10/2004 15:05

It took a week for the voice of reason to yell loud enough for the voice of emotion to hear her.

Tinker · 14/10/2004 22:55

But no-one else would have known you were the only one who turned up pc

Thomcat · 14/10/2004 22:59

Oh PC, bless! There is no way that was a personal thing though hon'. Do you think that all the others started a thread once you were out of the house to say 'no-one go' and had it deleted by the time you'd got home!!

CarrieG · 14/10/2004 23:14

I posted glibly before that I'd go to a meet-up quite happily & bugger off if it was full of unfriendly weirdoes - but I'd actually not really considered how I'd feel if it was not me but ds feeling uncomfortable! Very very p*ssed off I imagine.

So this thread's made me think a bit...ds is too young to be bothered, but I think when he's old enough to feel 'left out' I'd only go if I'd know at least a couple of people there...so probably only if I'd previously been to an 'adults' meet with the same people. Never would have occurred to me to worry before, thick skinned gobsh*te that I am!

JanH · 14/10/2004 23:19

When your voice of reason did allow you back on to MN, did you search for the thread where your meetup was organised, pc? It was probably full of apologies from the ones that didn't make it!

IME it's a good idea to CAT at least one of the people you're supposed to meet up with and get a mobile number - I would not go to a meetup without one (although last time we all had them but none of them had a signal - in the depths of the Lake District - that was a shock!)

mummylove · 14/10/2004 23:26

hi mumtochloe

i know how you feel, i took my dd to a playgroup that i had never been to before this wed. when i got arrived there were only 5 mums who were the organisers, i walked through the doors and instead of a hello got - "can you leave your pram outside please"... nice start

when i cam back in they just got on with what they were doing, no "hello", "what you little one called", "been here before" etc... I felt like it was my first day at school and nobody wanted to play with me. I am not a shy person so found it a bit funny but at first i was disheartened and actually felt like leaving, i asked if they would like me to help them and they almost seemed annoyed but i joined in whether they liked it or not. soon the place filled with lots of mummies and babies and it became quite clear that it was organised for their clique but i dint care as there were a few nice mums there who i got talking to and whether they like outsiders or not ill be back next week as my dd loved the toys they had.

sad bitches! hee hee!

i might even become one of them soon - only joking!

seriously though their bahaviour was sad, since becoming a parent i am more open and find it so easy to meet people, i have made more friends in the last 18 mths then i have since the years i left collage. i cant understand why they are cutting themselves off from getting to know me - im great!

Thomcat · 14/10/2004 23:30

Good attitude mummylove.
I feel the same way. Like when someone is rude or miserable and I'm still really cheerful, hope it really irritates that I'm so happy!!! Nicer when they suddenly turn friendly too though.

mummylove · 14/10/2004 23:34

yeah i love that - my mum always told me to just keep smiling it drives nasty people crazy and you cant be accused of anything wrong, it always works better than rising to their attitude. on my way out i went into the kitchen were they were probably bitching the new people (only joking) and said with a massive smil, "thank you so much, we have a great time, definitely be back next week"

i hope i next week i will br proven wrong and that they all just had bad pmt on wed and really they are lovely... fingers crossed.

mummylove · 14/10/2004 23:36

god please excuse my crap typing, below i sound like arnold schwartznegger (cant spell his name)

Thomcat · 14/10/2004 23:36

ha haaa, well done you!
Hopefully they'll turn out to be lovely people but if not irritate the hell out of them!

Thomcat · 14/10/2004 23:37

Apart from Coddy I am the queen of bad typing!

EvesMama · 14/10/2004 23:38

you sound great to mummylove, come to my playgroup any time, its got a lovely atmosphere, only started myself two weeks ago and both dd and me love it!!!

mummylove · 14/10/2004 23:39

ah thank you!

i live in surrey so it depends were you are!

EvesMama · 14/10/2004 23:44

little bit too far away---middlesbrough!
is there a surestart set up near you?, they are always good to try out?

mummylove · 15/10/2004 19:55

mumtochloe - are you about?

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