Are you anti-abortion? why?

[HAPPYFACE]

Reading another thread has made me keep thinking this question. I don't understand how anyone can be totally one way.
For me I think it is up to each person and I wouldn't judge anyones decision.
I personally think that whether to keep a child is complex. It changes your life forever when you have children! I don't see how it is beneficial to mother or child if their lives will be miserable.
You only get ONE LIFE and need to make the most of it.

Quottie you NEED to see someone, this is killing you slowly on the inside

Please see a counsellor

thats the Joy... the NHS dish out abortions like sweets, but... councilling? £65 an hour.

How very awful and insensitive. stupid woman ( the nurse)

I remember the scanner was a nice lady, but everyone else was awful... the let me go home and I was hemmorraging (sp?)... just said "oh, sometimes the doctors nick the womb"... I collapsed in the bathroom and everything. They just send you off with your antibiotics and your contraceptive pills.

quooty...

free counselling through the GP

i used to pay £25 per hour up north...£65 seems excessive...

Been to see a psychiatrist and psychologist and HV said I needed specialist councilling... and for that you have to pay.

I had my abortion at 12 weeks, and had to go private as if i had gone on the NHS i would have had to wait past 12 weeks.

I too had a scan just 10 mins before the abortion as they thought i had a double uterus, and they actually gave me a pic of my baby (which i still have)this was the BPAS and at the time i was glad to have a pic to grieve over, but now i think it is disgusting that they offered me a choice of pics

through BPAS? I think.

Mine was through BPAS too, can't believe they gave you a pic, thats awful really. I too had to go private to get it done by 12 weeks.

pucca... thats... awful actually. I wish I had a pic , but... in a way... im glad I dont.

I agree quootie, part of me then thought , actually i wish i had a pic, but then again i don't.

They also said i could find out the sex but would cost me an extra 100 pound as they had to do something invasive to the baby, i declined.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thats so awful.

There are very few circumstances in my life as it is now where if I became pregnant I would want to have an abortion. I can, at present, think of only two; pregnancy as the result of rape and pregnant with a severely disabled baby, eg with anencephaly.

Reading threads like this does make me think how lucky I have been to never have had an unplanned pregnancy. I agree that careful use of contraception has helped in this but no contraception is 100% and for many women who have unplanned pregnancies their circumstances may well make reliable use of contraception extremely difficult.

I would desperately hope to go through the rest of my life without having an abortion, as any woman surely would. I would never judge a woman for having an abortion, no one can ever truly step ito the shoes of another and understand exactly their present circumstances, past experiences and furture hopes. The circumstances under which I would have an abortion apply only to me right now and I would never dream of telling another woman that they are the only circumstances in which abortion is acceptable for her too.

The thing with the pic was they actually gave me a choice of a few AFTER the abortion as i was coming around, and when outside of the clinic i looked at the pic, and it wasn't just a blob you could actually see the face, as though it was looking over its shoulder...sent me into deep depression.

I should think it did pucca, how completely insensitive of them. Bloody awful.

Actually now i think, if i had seen the pic BEFORE there is no way i would have gone through with it, sounds very silly and naive i suppose, but it was my 1st pregnancy and i truely didn't realise how the baby would look at that stage.

thats horrible. horrible horrible. How cruel. I was in peices after mine... as soon as I came 'round I actually really thought, honestly "oh... I wonder if they can put it back?". I thought if I could stop the bleeding, it wouldnt be true... then afterwards I thought if I cried enough and put myself through hell enough, somehow... id still be pregnant.

nutcracker, please don't let this thread upset you.

You had to make a choice, and you could only decide what was best for your circumstances at the time.

The problem with such contentious threads as this is that some of us are considering very personal and life-changing situations when posting.

Others are commenting from very strongly held beliefs, but they have no personal experience to call upon - yet they appreciate that others do, and post accordingly, being respectful of the feelings of others.

A few posters have very strongly held beliefs, but the inability to empathise with the experiences of others. They feel it is appropriate to use words such as 'murder', and make ignorant statements eg: about the compulsory sterilisation of certain women.

It is this last group that causes hurt and anger IMO.

They are not worth getting upset over - and you certainly have no need to justify your life to anyone.

I find it astounding that some women (assuming the posters are women - I don't know) are unable to at least empathise with the feelings of others.

I also hope that they never find themselves in any of the situations described on this thread, only to meet with the dismissive, blinkered, thoughtless and patronising attitudes they have shown to others here.

these last few posts are so so

in an already upsetting and traumatic proceudre...guilt & shame are being loaded onto vulnerable women...my heart goes out to you all

i think there but for the grace of god go i , is something we would all do well to remember.....

QS...I do think to a certain degree i have blocked mine out now, don't get me wrong it will never be forgotten, how could it be? but you have to find a box in your mind and put it to rest, i have only recently (5 years ago) started to accept what i did and slightly move on iykwm, you can go on torturing yourself forever, but what does that achieve? i was offered counselling and AD's which i didn't take, but i did retreat into myself for a long time, but you do have to pick yourself up and accept your decision for the reasons you did what you did.

If you ever want to chat, or just offload just cat me.

Thankyou HC, I totally agree with everything you just said. It is such a hard subject to discuss especially when you have personal experiance of it.

I am going to leave this thread alone I think as it is just upsetting me alot.

Hugs to all of you who have been through terminations, and I hope those of you who haven't never find yourselves in the position where you don't feel like you have a choice.

DHW - i used to believe that after your 3rd termination you should be serilised as well. until i had to phone for my own 3rd appointment. my opinions are mostly the same as before but i have had to acknowledge that things just cannot be seen so black and white.

its a legal right and should remain for anyone to have a termination but it shouldn't be allowed to be used as frequantly as it is.

Your right there are many many women who really don't seem to understand the full implication of what an abortion really is.,...yes you are ending the possibility of life. i wouldn't say you are killing the baby as at the moment most women terminate that feotus could not sustain life outside the womb, but you are preventing the possibility of it having a life at some stage.

that shouldn't be an easy decision to make, and indeed in most cases it isnt. but i have had to sit in the recovery room following the op and listen to some stupid girl informing the other stupid girl next to her that this was her 5th abortion. she couldn't use the pill cos she forgets and she wasn't having the jab "cos i aint getting fat!"

she seemed to look at abortion as an extended morning after pill.
I despised that woman for many many months, she made me look at what i had done as well...question my own decision. i also really worried that anyone would see me leaving the hospital/clinic and think of me the way i thought ogf that girl.

I have explained my situations and i still, deep down know that they were the right thing to do at the time.
I don't agree with abortion generally but as i have found out myself there are so many grey area's that i couldn't possibly be anything BUT pro choice.

you cant say your anti abortion except when xyz...it doesn't work like that.

i cant block mine - its like justifying it & accepting it. And trying to forget it is like trying to forget the baby. I only cope through ADs/beta blockers/sleeping tablets/diazepam. Its this time of year aswell... 2 years ago. Last period Nov. 3rd, abortion 25th Jan, D & C Feb. 18th, due date August 10th. I wear a peridot (august birthstone) on a necklace, and a peridot bracelet now.

OMG
ouldn't read all of this thread, but felt I had to post with regards DDH comments about working in gynae ward - some people, I include myself in this category, laugh and joke make small talk as a way of coping/ keeping themselves together as opposed to falling to pieces, afterall surely there would then be people who said 'well it was your choice why are you so upset?'.

It's all well and good to have your opinion but to pass judgement on people because they behave in a way you find inappropriate is just wrong.