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Original poster

Do you think you're fat?

421 replies

ThingsThatGoHumpInTheNight · 08/08/2013 22:22

I do. And I'm wrong. I know rationally I am not fat. I am 5'5 weigh 9st7ish, dress size 8-10, body fat 18-22%, you can see my ribs from behind and my abs in front....so why oh why do I constantly feel crap about myself?

I do eat more crap than I probably should do (chocolate 5 times a week Sad ) and I do carry weight up top (32FF boobs)...but I am not fat. So why do I feel like I am? Constantly worry that I am. People I don't know well (new work colleagues, random people at parties) make offhand comments 'healthy breakfast again eh?' this morning as I ate a croissant and fruit at my desk and it makes me feel awful.

Are other people like this? Why????

Sorry to anyone this offends...I feel for people with weight issues, I really do, but been thinking about this today (sparked by comment this morning) and wondering if I am the only one?

OP posts:
mercury7 · 09/08/2013 11:44

it's no so much the fact of having some body fat, more where it is located, if I could will the fat from my belly to move into my bosoms and onto my bottom I'd happily carry alot more fat than I do.

I choose to stay thin because I dont much like the shape of myself when I have more fat.

To answer the question, no I dont think I'm fat...I find it pretty easy to control my weight/body composition

BlackAffronted · 09/08/2013 11:44

Yes, Im at least 10 stone overweight.

Dededum · 09/08/2013 11:45

I am 5ft 9" and 14 on top / 16 on bottom. No idea what I weigh but don't have scales. Don't feel fat, don't really think about it.

Passthecake30 · 09/08/2013 11:46

I'm not fat....6ft and size 12.., 10st5. But I am squidgey. Would love to be toned like ten years ago, but I have my gorgeous kids instead.

People think I am about a size 8 though. I get comments on what I am eating and that I shouldn't eat diet food (I like revitalise, nuts, fruit....also like crisps, choc, popcorn, pizza!). I think I am the only person who can see the squidge tbh

BlackAffronted · 09/08/2013 11:51

Nothing worse than when one of yoru skinny friends says "omg im so fat, look at this!" whilst pinching the teeniest but of skin.

I tend to just look at them silently like this .... Hmm

MrsOakenshield · 09/08/2013 11:52

I'm fat, definitely, 5'2" and nearly 10 stone, size 12/14. Very petite frame. Should be 8.5 stone max, size 8. Very flabby too, yeuch.

Having just seen a picture of me from several years ago I am Going To Do Something About It at last! Just bought a sports bra (my biggest excuse for not doing any exercise) and marmite rice cakes instead of a 2nd breakfast of a choc croissant!

FreedomOfTheTess · 09/08/2013 11:52

6ft 4, a size 12/14, definitely NOT fat.

Naebother · 09/08/2013 11:55

My bmi is 28 so i am overweight bit I am very active and fit. I look ok and feel strong and healthy so I dont worry anymore about my weight.

flowersinavase · 09/08/2013 11:56

No. I work out hard, live a very active life and eat healthy food. I don't drink too much and don't 'treat' myself with food. My body is strong and healthy.

Having had cancer I now treat my body with respect: food is fuel, nutrition and medicine. The thought of eating a doughnut or a bag of crisps repulses me, not because they'll make me fat but because they're full of junk which will harm me and have nothing good in them to benefit me.

Focusing on health (rather than calories) means that I'll never be fat: by definition, fat is unhealthy.

Dededum · 09/08/2013 11:57

Fascinating article in the Guardian this week, about how the guidelines for obesity / overweight are totally random. Not based on hard medical studies, but food industry reports.

Most people know what unhealthy feels like, shortness of breath, not being able to touch your toes etc.. Do we really need a chart to tell us whether we are overweight?

In life I think make sure you exercise (walking is fine), eat reasonably healthily, decrease stress, do excess (food/drink/drugs) in moderation and laugh loads.

mercury7 · 09/08/2013 12:01

'fat: by definition, fat is unhealthy.'
I get what you are saying Flowers, but you would probably concede that a certain (albeit small) amount of body fat is conducive to health?

I suppose the question is at what point does the amount of body fat you have become detrimental to health.

The other separate issue is at what point does body fat become unattractive, thats surely a cultural thing?

ohforfoxsake · 09/08/2013 12:07

No I don't, so I am constantly shocked by the over-weight, middle aged woman's body which I see in the mirror when I bother to look.

Truth is I have two stone to lose, I feel a million times healthier when I am eating well both in body and mind. For health and well being I NEED to lose weight.

I am always starting 'tomorrow'. When i am actively doing it - the eating well and running - I look forward to it, to the clear head, the sense of well being, the smaller bum, the kind comments.

The truth is I am greedy and lazy.

GobblersKnob · 09/08/2013 12:10

I have no idea, think I am a bit dysmorphic, was anorexic in my early twenties, so I am a bit skewered.

I am 5'10" just over 11 stone and around a 12 depending on where I shop. I think I am disgustingly hideously huge and I really dislike my body.

elastamum · 09/08/2013 12:10

I am a bit fat. 5ft 5in and 10st 8.

BUT I am pretty fit, very active and generally happy. I keep half heartedly trying to lose a bit of weight, but I have recently realised that I dont really care. I would like to be a bit fitter and improve my core strength as I ride a lot and would ride much better if I had the core strength I use dto have when I was younger.

Truth is that I like my curvy self just as much as the thinner one Smile

Naebother · 09/08/2013 12:23

Did anyone watch " the men WHO made us thin" last night?

EasyToEatTiger · 09/08/2013 12:23

I have to remind myself that the shape and size of my body is just as it is and that there are more important things to worry about. Years ago, I was very ill with eating problems and was told that I'd probably die of them. it is better to find ways to live instead of ways to die.

People come in so many shapes and sizes and none of us are immediately photoshopped barbie doll smooth, and anyway, which adult really wants to carry the flesh of a baby's bum?

I think that in order to lose or gain weight, we need to shift the focus. Small changes.

Original poster
ThingsThatGoHumpInTheNight · 09/08/2013 12:32

Argh, sorry, haven't disappeared, just busy at work. Will read and reply later...

OP posts:
massistar · 09/08/2013 12:33

The problem is that society's obsession with weight is so endemic and insidious. Up till my early 30's I never worried about my weight (despite a mother who yoyo dieted and had bulimia for most of her life). I never had scales but was always a size 8.

Since having children I've made new friends who all constantly bang on about being fat. They're all slim, eat healthily and go to the gym a lot. So when I look at how slim they are and see how worried they are I start to doubt myself. I must be fat too, right?

I'm not, I'm a size 10 and pretty toned. But it creeps in.

Cherrypi · 09/08/2013 12:34

I did Naebother. It was very interesting. I wonder if he will reveal the ideal solution eventually.

thegreylady · 09/08/2013 12:35

I know I am fat!

bananamonkey · 09/08/2013 12:44

Yes but that's because I am (5'8 and size 12, don't have scales because I don't think it's a good idea for me). My
perceptions are completely skewed though, I have a big frame and a round face and have been called fat all my life. It takes me 2 stone to drop a dress size and in my eyes I can't tell the difference. It doesn't help that all my friends and colleagues are petite and slim. I'm an intelligent grown up person but my happiness is tied up in my weight, it's ridiculous! I do keep it to myself though as I'm sure it's thoroughly dull and self-obsessed.

BuntyCollocks · 09/08/2013 12:44

I class myself as overweight rather than fat. I'm 5'8, size 16, and I do not look what I weigh at all. I am, however, 7 months after having my second baby in 2 years, breastfeeding (which for me makes me hold on to weight), and slowly losing it now using my fitness pal and exercise.

It's slow going, but I am getting happier and I know when dd starts feeding less it'll drop off more easily.

BaronessTeapot · 09/08/2013 12:54

Like Gobblersknob, I had an eating disorder when I was younger so try not to focus too much on my size.

I "know" I am not fat by weight & size but I definitely imagine myself to be bigger than I really am.

I imagine I am quite unusual in that I look at a photograph of myself and see someone thinner than I thought I was - but I'd be happy to hear other views on this.

BalloonSlayer · 09/08/2013 12:57

I am not fat at just under 9 stone and 5'4.5" tall. But I have very skinny arms and legs and my middle feels bulgy and untoned. On holiday at the moment and there are mirrors in unexpected places Confused. Plus I am finding it hard walking up steep slopes/lots of steps while we are away.

However, am pushing 50 so don't want to lose any weight as such as my poor old face is looking tragic enough.

Thus the Jillian DVD is coming out as soon as we get home. .

I am not fat and never have been and I have no issues about my body at all. I have a good body "for a woman of my age." But I can still look at parts of my body and think to myself "ooh I am not liking the way this has started to look" < stares accusingly at tummy >

BitchyRestingFace · 09/08/2013 13:02

I am about 9st now at 5'6", and whilst I know logically that I am not fat, I feel it sometimes. It is more that I'm not "toned", I think. Too soft and wobbly. Can't seem to motivate myself to exercise, though, so I can't be that bothered!

I went down to 8st 5lb last year when I had braces put on my teeth and couldn't eat properly, and was a bit disconcerted by how addictive it became - the weighing myself, turning sideways in the mirror and admiring the tiny little waist, the smaller clothes I could wear...it did border on unhealthy. Both my parents (separately, they don't speak to each other) telling me I looked haggard kind of brought me crashing back down to earth, though. And in any case, once my teeth settled down and I could eat again, I stabilised, and once the braces were off and there were no longer things I could not eat, I popped back up to 9st and stayed there.

I have more or less accepted that I'm at an age now where I can't be thin unless I want to look ill, and I would rather have an ample backside than a haggard face, so that's where I am now. If I'm completely honest, though, I'd love to be smaller.