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21 facts about MNs - Are they accurate?

175 replies

zombieslayer · 01/04/2012 13:37

Hi I am a lurker. I am just posting to check out the accuracy of my knowledge of mumsnet. Can someone let me know if these are accurate and if I have missed anything out (note it is after 12pm, so too late for April Fool's jokes!)

  1. Naice ham is a reference to a shopping list a poster found in a supermarket.
  1. Pombears refers to a dinner party where the OP and her DH were offered a variety of nursery type food. At a later dinner the OP's DH offered everyone pom bears.
  1. The poo Troll posts about a variety of improbable poo situations often involving manual evacuation, including the infamous thread about a woman pooing her clothes in St Pancras Rail Station. A Mn's sister was dispatched with clean clothes to said toilet to find them empty.
  1. Zombie is a very nice zombie who lives in a Trade Marked Dustbin and has promised to warn all Mn's of any imminent zombie invasion.
  1. Honeydragon has only flambeed 1 dog on a thread about the most intelligent MNs. (Although I have never understood how the reference to only 1 dog is a defence!)
  1. Netmums is either a perfectly reasonable alternative site with greater support than here. Or the tool of the devil full of tickers, anti SN comments, racism, sexism and homophobia - and no swearing! Although some posters belong to both, including MrsDeVere who was forced by netmums to reduce the size of her sparkly tickers after a complaint by another poster.
  1. All self respecting MN's do a maintenance wash and put veet down the plug hole.
  1. Benefit threads never end well.
  1. An OFRS is a rucksack to keep by the door in case of a zombie invasion or any other disaster. There are many threads discussing this with the more practicaly minded including dry foods, battery torches, weapons and those strictly in mum mode including baby wipes and favourite DCs toys.

10.The moldies were a group in 2008 who fell out with people here and left to start their own site, only to never be heard from again.

  1. Swearing is perfectly acceptable here and any thread asking for less swearing, especially from a newbie, will not end well.

  2. Somone will always post - what business is it of yours to any thread commenting on somebody else's family - even in AIBU.

  3. Using the term Huns is not acceptable.

  4. There is no such thing as populars, unpopulars or royalty, just those who are long time lurkers, prolific posters, or post occasionally.

  5. Anyone can post here - men, childless women, even dogs as long as they can type and have their own MN account.

  6. A sock puppet is a second user name that some posters use to post support for their point of view when no-one is agreeing with them - particularly useful in AIBU.

  7. Anyone typing "think of the children" is always being ironic.

  8. Friday night is bumsex night i.e. there should under MN Terms & Conditions always be a thread that involves anal sex.

  9. Centreparcs that you may previously have thought of as an overpriced middle class holiday destination, is in fact a hotbed of bumsex.

  10. Fathers 4 Justice regularly post here berating mums for being men hating. The "correct" response is to talk about the weather, where you are taking your kids that day or to offer round biscuits.

  11. Whether lurking or posting, MN is addictive.

OP posts:
mosschops30 · 01/04/2012 20:48

We dont see much of the bat nowadays.

Used to love threads where someone woud post 'you need this

mosschops30 · 01/04/2012 20:49

Hmm link didnt work

Hassled · 01/04/2012 20:54

Further to my earlier post about the forthcoming EdExcel GCSE in MN Studies, I'm able to supply a few more details for those of you looking to improve your qualifications.

40% coursework assessed by the AIBU board. Don't know what on yet. Maybe something about the role foodstuff has played in the MN dynamic.

60% spread over two written exams, one which covers basic historical MN facts and one which looks at reasoning skills and will consist of a controversial statement followed by the word "Discuss".

NonnoMum · 01/04/2012 20:56

Just wanted to add...

MNers are a wealth of knowledge in hunting down and (gently?!) assassinating shoddy/indulgent/justplainsmug journalism/blogging such as the article belonging to someone who had a tornado through her MiddleClassDon'tYaKnow street or making blog references to MyLittlePonyIsh world, a la Berry Ken Loves...

MN makes me larf...

NorksAreMessy · 01/04/2012 21:07

HTH does NOT mean that you genuinely want to be helpful.
It is snarky.

HTH

NeverKnowinglyUnderstood · 01/04/2012 21:09

totally loving this thread.
I miss the bat,
and cod's spelling

zombieslayer · 01/04/2012 21:17

I can't believe no-one has offered Olivia any gin! Tsskk manners of people these days

OP posts:
zombieslayer · 01/04/2012 21:17

even

OP posts:
zombieslayer · 01/04/2012 21:19

Still hasn't come out right!

OP posts:
OliviaLMumsnet · 01/04/2012 21:24

ThanksGrin

zombieslayer · 01/04/2012 21:27

Only if you drink too much Olivia. And then it may have negative affects on your thinking. For example, if you have too much, you may start to think that introducing tickers into MN would bea good idea! So don't drink too much please.

OP posts:
PavlovtheCat · 01/04/2012 21:31

zombie you are clearly not a very long time lurker if you dont know the bat.

moss i love that bat. I guess it has been replaced with the biscuit?

zombieslayer · 01/04/2012 21:32

Ok not very long time lurker. Would someone please explain the bat?

OP posts:
Maryz · 01/04/2012 21:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

zombieslayer · 01/04/2012 21:44

Aaaaaaggghhh! Should know by now, never to click links on MN. Thanks Maryz Hmm

OP posts:
IamtheZombie · 01/04/2012 22:34

Zombie apologises for abandoning this thread for a few hours.

Even Zombie has a real life. She must try and make sure it doesn't interfere with her MN life too much...

Grin Grin Grin

ElasticNipples · 01/04/2012 22:48

you also forgot that anything we write on here ends up in the daily fail Grin

Stratters · 01/04/2012 22:51

^ true dat.

zombieslayer · 01/04/2012 22:59

No problem Zombie Grin. Slayer too had left thread to do the ironing Sad.

Olivia - could we turn this into a Frequently Asked Questions that could permanently be on the site somewhere? So maybe ,ove this into site stuff, ask epoipel to contribute and from submissions MNHQ could compile FAQ?

OP posts:
gemma4d · 01/04/2012 23:14

Wank Mits? Never did I imagine such a device until MN.

CointreauVersial · 01/04/2012 23:15

Here's another:

Anyone with any kind of spot, boil, cyst or other pustule, either on their own body, or on that of a close associate, is obliged to announce it on MN and then post in great detail the squeezing thereof, and post pictures on their profile of the resulting eruption.

Stratters · 01/04/2012 23:18

And sound The Klaxon. Grin

ExitPursuedByABear · 01/04/2012 23:23

Marking as only just found this thread and need to update tomorrow.

DeepThought · 01/04/2012 23:25

juggling mangoes

and poor ole fedda didn't do so well with hoovers either

DeepThought · 01/04/2012 23:26

also has anyone said about wnaky baskets?