Crikey - Guess what MIL has done now!

[smackapacca]

Not only has she looked after my children whilst I have a day off as I'm a bit ill, but she's just TEXTED to say she'll drop them back later in their PJs ready for bed so I don't have to go and collect them.

Oh and she's had my dog all day too.

What kind of family did I marry in to??? What on earth should I do???

Purple I'm also going to report you too - can you really not see what you're doing here?

The message that you're giving out???

You want to watch her, seriously. She'll be trying to sneak baskets of ironing out of the door and telling you she's only trying to help and she enjoys it. You make sure you get that ironing back, and don't allow her to manipulate you into having your shittest jobs done for you, the gaslighting bitch. You need to get DH to stand up to her.

Lunatic - don't let purple/usual's post dishearten you.

We're all here to support you.

Thats's dispicable Lunatic

She clearly taking advantage of your vunerability

Smacka I've reported them too..

Standards cannot be allowed to slip on MN and HQ needs to know just how good bad things have got.

So what strategies shall we put in place for dealing with behaviour like this?

Next time I visit MIL and she has made a special effort to air out the double bed for me and DP should I insist on sleeping on the sofa? Or will throwing a turkey at her do?

My mil sold her house recently and gave each of her (many) grandchilden £500 each. £500!!! Each!!! I'm still reeling from the insult TBH. I don't know what she was hoping to achieve by pulling that little stunt, but it hasn't worked, we still don't trust her.

She had the gall to say it was to help them save for uni, or put towards buying a car when they are old enough. Just how gullible does she thing we are?

I blame my own mother ,she still slips my 19 year old DS a tenner now and again to treat himself

Frankly I'm too distracted to think. I'm frantically waiting on the sofa lying down with MN awaiting the return of my washed, fed and sleeping children.

My MIL brought me round a lovely red poinsettia plant although, not wishing to appear ungrateful, I didn't have the heart to tell her that I would have preferred deadly nightshade .

See, usual's last post just goes to show how this is a generational self forfilling prophecy thing.

The damage done by one MIL just goes to set up abuse further down the generations. We do need intervention and we need state funding to help.

wizz what was she thinking? - I hope you binned it.

mine's like this too - so interfering
i reluctantly agreed that she could take the DC every single Friday afternoon while I work . the interfering cowbag always washes, dries, and puts away the breakfast and lunch things while DD2 naps. WHO said she could touch my cutlery???

Suckit - I bet she puts it away correctly too.

of course she does. she's just showing off.

And what about when they visit you in hospital, after you've had a baby? My mum came to see me without even checking whether she was allowed to and expected to hold the baby!

I thought the nurses were supposed to stop that sort of thing happening.

Mine occasionally phones me for no other reason than to tell me that she considers herself lucky to have me for a DIL and that she thinks I'm a wonderful mother and loves me very much! Can you imagine? That kind of abusive doublespeak is just so confusing. I feel so lost. I just have to try to hold on to the fact that she is the crazy one here. Next time I think I'm just going to hang up. I shouldn't have to listen to that kind of talk in my own home.

My MIL waited at home until invited to visit at home as I didn't want anyone visiting me in hospital.

Passive aggressive doing as I wished.

and don't get me started on presents
on dd2's birthday she not only turned up with a pirate ship, but pressed £50 onto me "for the practical bits and pieces she needs"
so bloody OTT.

I think my downfall was right at the start, when I let her host our wedding reception in their garden.

She organised the catering, decoration, flowers, everything.

Even told me she didn't feel like she was losing a son but gaining a daughter...

I should have seen the signs.

Yeah my MIL did that too smackapacca. So PA. She's a piece of work.

My FIL used to be like this, it isn't just the women you know! He would look after DS1+2 while I worked, taking them to museums and train spotting, I mean educational stuff! And would have them overnight occasionally so DH and I could go out. Thank god he died before DS3 came along!

sobs quietly at not actually being glad of that last sentance

She sounds as though she's mounted a campaign into inveighling herself into your life, Migrating. You should have nipped that in the bud; it's probably too late now.