NEVER SEND YOUR CHILD TO NURSERY

[NicoleBailey]

hi.. mums, i am a full time mummy to a little girl of 16months.
personally.. having worked in different nurserys i would advise anyone NOT to ever ever send their child to a particular one~!
dont know if i can name names..
before i was pregnant i worked for a private nursery it was brillant from day 1 we had lots of training. and was taught to give a home from home enviroment and treat each child as if it was your own. after i had my little girl, i went to work for a well know chain of nurserys. and was disqusted!it seemed to be run by young girls who didnt have any children. and who had just left school.. the girls wouldnt go near any children that werent up to their hygine standards. exapmle.. a child fell over in playground and had grazed their hand. none of the girls wanted to go and compfort the child as it 'smelt' they were all saying 'no you go..' i was outraged. this little child was crying and no one would go to them.
i dont care what anyone says if a child fell over and smelt or not.. you dont ever not go to it. the girls had 'favopurites' if the child turnt up to nursery in a bmw and latest nike trainers then the girls loved them! nappy times.. the girls didnt warn the child or tell the child they were about to be changed they just grabbed the child and layed it on the floor on nappy mat. and wondered why the child is kicking and screming..they hadnt pre told the child 'in a min im going to do your nappy'! by the end of my 1st day i felt sick! i couldnt believe i had enrolled my daughter to such a place. never in a million years would any child of been treated like this at my previous place of work.
my one the day before i left my littlegirl was left crying for ages in a corner. and she doesnt smell! and wears the latest clothes/trainers!! i was working in toddler room down the corridor and could hear her crying..i asked if i could go and check on her and was told to wait until my break was due.. which was half hour away. 10 mins later we could still hear her crying.. so the room leader rang down to the baby unit and asked if i was my daughter we could hear. and 2 mins later a girl from the room came up to toddlers and said' yes shes a bit upset at the moment but dont come down because if she sees you it might upsaet her even more' i was angry and wanted to go to her. so kindley a girl swapped breaks with me and i ran down to baby room , where in the corner was my daughter sitting propped up with pillows. hyperventaliating. all the girls were the other side of the room chatting over the wall to other nursery workers, i picked her up and tried to settle her, but she couldnt breathe she was crying that much. the girls hadnt even noticed id come in the room, i rocked her to sleep and went straight to nursery managagers office to complain about everything id seen in the few days which id worked their.. and i asked to see the cctv of the baby room so i culd see just how long she had been crying and to see if any one had tryed to calm her down. we watched for bout 5 mins, where a girl picked her up tryed to rock her then put her back down. still screaming! the manager stopped the tape before it went on any further. my daughter was ill the next day with a viral infection.. dont know how or where she picked that up from (prob nursery) so i didnt go back into work for the rest of that week. then i sent a letter handing my notice in. remember babies cannot talk or tel you what happened to them. just because the nursery looks friendly and clean. be cautious.. if your child makes a huge fuss before going to nursery in hte morning its probley because they are not cared for correctly whilst their. advice to partents..
quit your job! why have children if you stick them in a nursery 7-am -7-pm get family members to help you. i reported this nursery to oftead and it was not the 1st compaint as staff ratios had been compalined about in the baby room. ofstead njst warned them. now they have re-opened in a new name!!

so advice.. NEVER SEND YOUR CHILD TO NURSERY and the fees you pay are a rip off!!

welcome to mumsnet Nicole
Good on you for coming back on here and taking it on the chin.
Sorry to see that a few people have not taken on board Aitch?s sensible post and cut you a little slack there.
Hope it doesn?t put you off posting on this forum. It is a great place to be if you are prepared to take the flak now and again. While you might feel like you have discovered a rather brutal side of the place today, let me assure you that there is plenty of warmth, empathy and support too. I think nurseries and working mums is a well worn and battered topic. Best to steer clear of the backlash..

By SecretSlattern on Mon 02-Mar-09 18:32:45
"I can assure all the working mums who have to use nurseries that Ive never met any nursery nurses that would neglect any child to this standard..."

Unfortunately, I have

"...and I find the O.P post very hard to believe." And unfortunately, I don't

Secret slattern I want belittling any experience you may have had but my point was directed at nursery nurses people who have trained and studied quite hard to gain a qualification in what is quite a low paid field.

I think that sometimes nurseries employ people with little no experience/qualifications and whilst working with children is easy if it 'comes to you naturally' its not just a job anyone can do and I think a lot of younger people are in the jobs purely bcos it 'seemed' easy.

nickschick - totally agree! I really think the answer is increasing qualifications AND pay for nursery workers, and improving the status of people in this sector, so it's no longer seen as a fallback option for girls who don't know what else to do, and unscrupulous managers can't use them for cheap labour.

By Lemontart on Mon 02-Mar-09 18:35:32
welcome to mumsnet Nicole
Good on you for coming back on here and taking it on the chin.
Sorry to see that a few people have not taken on board Aitch?s sensible post and cut you a little slack there.
Hope it doesn?t put you off posting on this forum. It is a great place to be if you are prepared to take the flak now and again. While you might feel like you have discovered a rather brutal side of the place today, let me assure you that there is plenty of warmth, empathy and support too. I think nurseries and working mums is a well worn and battered topic. Best to steer clear of the backlash..

Home education and breast v bottle are best avoided too

I think what you say highlights that we have to be selective about which nurseries we choose for our children or who we decide will look after our children.
Badly worded post but well done for coming back

what a big fat load of shit. can't read past the first line anyway.

we've all seen crappy childminders i'm sure, just as we've all seen crap parents..certainly heard of them/seen them on the news.

ffs a child could be mistreated by anyone, nursery nurse/mother/grandfather/anyone.

I think the OP is far too specific and hastily dashed off to be a troll.

She did say there were good nurseries.

She did say she reported this bad one to OFSTED.

She mad a very poor error in judgement saying DO NOT SEND YOUR CHILD TO NURSERY.

But beyond that, there's nothing in her OP that would give me cause for concern if I felt confident in my choice of nursery.

If I had some nagging concerns however, it might prompt me to make an impromptu drop in to be sure.

She as a ridiculously transparent user name, and has named and shamed the nursery. So I don't think this is trolling, or stirring for no reason.

Ah, the classic 'why have children?' line. Clearly, you are quite the original thinker, NicoleBailey.

Thread title so misleading and contraversial!!!

Sorry you have had a negative nursery experience. And so glad to read that you reported it.

Fortunatelt many of us have had very positive experience.

I hope you sort out something for your child.

I've seen some awful stuff in nurseries too, having worked and trained in quite a few

wouldn't use them myself

Sycamoretree - perhaps you only read the OP and not followed the thread. You say she dashed off to be a troll... did you not notice that she did come back and apologise?

I'm still wondering why I had a child - clearly just to fund the local nursery (which seems wonderful, but must be terrible really).

Well said, Riven.

Sycamoretree is saying that the OP (original poster) isn't a troll, because the OP (original post) was dashed off and hastily written whereas a troll would have thought it through more carefully.

I have no problem with the OP. Sorry for your bad experience.

My sister has worked in nursery care as part of her PGCE and came home crying most evenings. She implored me never to consider it for my DDs.

Surely encouraging parents to be more selective and demanding about their children's care is a good thing?

"For gods sake - you lot are like a bunch of screaming witches. Why don't you stop following each other like sheep and have a proper discussion? Yes , the op is contraversial , how is that ground for reporting her? Shall I report someone everytime they post something contraversial? Pathetic."

I'm with deepinlaundry!

Come on don;t be too harsh on the OP, whilst her original post was too much and over the top, understandably she was upset at the treatment of her child.

We've all had a rant and rave then later calmed down, she even said herself that her previous place of employment was fab, the trouble is once you've hit that post message buttin you can't take it back, i know you can delete it but that just makes everyone nosy/pissed off!!!

And she has also apologised

maybe she meant never send your child to THIS nursery?

Thanks for the useful advice. I'll quit my job and wait for the house to be re-possessed, stop buying food, bills etc and wait for my DS to be taken by social services for living in a cardboard box in the cold with his mum and dad.

I haven't read all of this thread. I can't really be bothered. It's inflammatory bollocks

Nicole, did it not at any point occur to you before hitting post that telling ALL working parents that ALL nurseries were terrible (on the basis that 50% of the nurseries you've worked in were terrible) and that they should ALL quit their jobs or use family for childcare and NEVER send their children to ANY nursery was ... well ... a bit daft? And that, having made that kind of sweeping statement aimed at a broad segment of society, some of them were going to be pissed off?

The point I think (hope?) you were trying to make, that we need to be alert to the fact that there is some frankly substandard care out there, and that we need to try to identify the nurseries like the first one you worked in and avoid the nurseries like the second one is a good one.

I would quite like to stay at home, or at least cut back on my hours. But I've had to go back to work because (among other things) the bank are sending me rude letters about my overdraft. My husband is 4500 miles away and my family all have full time jobs.

One of the big attractions of my DCs' nursery is that it has a wide age range of staff, including quite a few grandparents. Many of the staff in the baby room looking after DD now were there three years ago when DS was a baby. And I can see the genuine affection still there between them and DS, so I'm pretty confident that they aren't neglecting DD. I also know that it pays staff better than the other nurseries in the area, allows for shorter shifts and longer breaks, and that's why they can attract the really good staff.

come on you murderous crows nest back down with the other vipers. OP has apologised.

"no longer seen as a fallback option for girls who don't know what else to do"

I don't agree Willow - in the nursery I worked we had 15 full time members of staff 14 of whom had put in their time to train as a nursery nurse and 1 who was working towards the qualification, our lunch supervisors 3 were qualified, 2 were mums - 1 had child at nursery, 1 was a grandmother, and 1 was working towards a qualification. Had you asked any of us if this was a fall back we would have honestly answered No - we had all studied for 2 years, had experience in childcare sector - and most stayed at the nursery for 3 years +, so it wasn't a stop gap.

I think maybe you're missing my point Twims? The problem isn't with nurseries that have qualified, dedicated staff, but in those that have disinterested, unqualified staff who are doing it because they didn't know what else to do.