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[Dragonbrandybutter]

Welcome to the Mumsnet Orchestra
What's your instrument?
We are particularly short of armpit musicians, and those proficient with a kazoo.

On the toy piano...
ExtraFancy
DaDaDa
Tassisssss
Edam
Hugeheadofhair
Mamadiva
MissMama
Mumhadenough
Va nessaParody
Needmorecoffee
Princesspeahead

On the Little Tykes Xylophone...
BoccaDellaVerita
Horton

On the egg slicer...
NoBiggy

Choir...
Avenanap

On the recorder...
MrsWednesday
MarkStretch
Scaredoflove on two recorders up her nose

On the Squeezy musical octopus...
TarkaLiotta
IorekByrnison

On the ruler on the kitchen counter...
Nibnabs

On the toy saxophone...
Stinkyfeet

Beatboxing...
DaDaDa

On the flute (for real)...
Geraldinetheluckygoat

On the spoons...
Seeker

And er...
standing her toast up on its edges
JackieNo

And as i've gone to all the trouble of making a list a putting in all the emphasis (even though it's all wrong and i can't be bothered to fix it) then I bags being The Conductor

d'you want my dses in the brass section
they do good TRUMP-ets

Can I play the flute too please? Or the piccolo?
Or I could sing - soprano - or... bang pot lids? Or play the fork on the cheese grater? Or the counter-top drums with my tiny little creme brulee flame thrower... (Since I've lately been accused of going somewhat Nigella in the one-child tea room... Bocca will know what I'm talking about..)

Intrigued to see so many musical windows here. This could be a good opening for us.

La la la la laaaaaaaaaaaaaa

If the entire orchestra could only travel back in time to circa 1980, I could play any tune you like through the gap between the roof of my mouth and the plastic plate of my braces.

Oh god, i've found you all. I thought i'd missed the bus. I've had a nightmare with my rulers, found a beautiful red one, but on its first note it shattered and i ended up with splinters everywhere. Have since recovered, popped down to Smiths and stocked up on shatterproofs. Transparent i'm afraid, but no more shards in eyeballs. Am i to late? Do you still need me?

I'll join avenenap in the choir, although you will have to have the dcs all shouting "Mummy be quiet!" as well.

ooo hello!!!

well as a music teacher i can play:

oboe (main instrument)
piano (grade 7)
flute (grade 5)
clarinet (up to grade 4/5)
violin (grade 6)
trumpet (grade 4)
viola (a little)

i'd be up for anything really!

And my DS has one of those canary whistles you fill with water and it chirps. But if you let him in, could you position him the other end to me please? This is something i need to do on my own. Regain my confidence, i'm a human, not just a mum you know. I do have a name other than mummy.

I have played the typewriter in the Toy Symphony. Not sure whether we still have the typewriter in the attic so could I do an amplified mouse click?

If there is a choral section I think I could be quite good with writing some lyrics for them.... here is my portfolio:

Come on greenman
oh come on green man
oh come on greeeeeeeen man
come on green man
(to the tune of come on Eileen)

Now its time to have a wee
have a wee
have a wee
now its time to have a wee
have a lovely little wee!
(to the tune of cold and frosty morning)

Nurs - e -ry
(click tongue)
Nurs-e-ry
(click tongue)
for we all love nursery!

(to the tune of Vindaloo)

and

Mum told me to go in my pushchair
I said no no no
Mum told me to go in my pushchair
I said no no no

She said then why don't you just walk
I said I would say if I could talk
See my legs, my legs have turned to jelly
But I hate my pushchair
its so smelly!
(To the tune of Amy Winehouse's Rehab)

I hope I can be of help for this talented group of musicians - Must say though - I feel a record deal coming on, with or without my help, with so much talent in the air!!!!

World's worst fiddle player here but very enthusiastic.

I play the jaw harp like a bitch though.

asdmumandteacher - you are most welcome, but don't think you might, ahem, be slumming it a little? The standard here may not be quite what you're used to.

tea - you have kept very quiet until now about your lyrical abilities!

Bocca

(violin Grade 1 and assorted recorders)

The roll call so far (with apologies to anybody I've missed) -

On the toy piano...

ExtraFancy
DaDaDa
Tassisssss
Edam
Hugeheadofhair
Mamadiva
MissMama
Mumhadenough
Va nessaParody
Needmorecoffee
Princesspeahead

On the Little Tykes Xylophone...

BoccaDellaVerita
Horton

On the egg slicer...

NoBiggy

Choir...

Avenanap
Wilbur
thumbwitch
littlefish

On the recorder...

MrsWednesday
MarkStretch
Scaredoflove on two recorders up her nose

On the Squeezy musical octopus...

TarkaLiotta
IorekByrnison

On the ruler on the kitchen counter...

Nibnabs

On the toy saxophone...

Stinkyfeet

Beatboxing...

DaDaDa

On the flute (for real)...

Geraldinetheluckygoat

On the spoons...

Seeker
califraundingfathers (also kazoo and nose flute)

on the Zafira roof bars...

BecauseI'mworthit

on the typewriter/mouse...

lilymaid

on the jaw harp...

gentleotter

on the canary whistle...

sonofnibnabs

on knicker elastic...

daughterofsauerkraut

on the windows...

marymotherofcheeses (pvc)
treedelivery (sash)

on percussion...

custardo
jacksfirstchristmasmama
sunnygirl1412

whistlingl...

smilesslikenoo ther

genuine musicality...

asdmumandteacher

Original lyrics...

teafortwo

And er...

standing her toast up on its edges
JackieNo

All under the musical direction of...

dragonbrandybutter

OI! What about ME!

By differentID on Sun 30-Nov-08 00:13:34
Califrau, not at all.

Can I join in?

I've put my xmas name on.

I'll be on stylophone and want perform the following solos :

the organ part in Saint-Saens Organ Symphony

the celeste part in Sugar Plum Fairy

And the opening bit in Walk of Life (Dire Straits)

The roll call so far (as amended). With apologies to tipsyfairy and anybody I've still missed -

On the toy piano...

ExtraFancy
DaDaDa
Tassisssss
Edam
Hugeheadofhair
Mamadiva
MissMama
Mumhadenough
Va nessaParody
Needmorecoffee
Princesspeahead

On the Little Tykes Xylophone...

BoccaDellaVerita
Horton

On the egg slicer...

NoBiggy

Choir...

Avenanap
Wilbur
thumbwitch
littlefish

On the recorder...

MrsWednesday
MarkStretch
Scaredoflove on two recorders up her nose

On the flute...
tipsyfairydifferentID

On the Squeezy musical octopus...

TarkaLiotta
IorekByrnison

On the ruler on the kitchen counter...

Nibnabs

On the toy saxophone...

Stinkyfeet

Beatboxing...

DaDaDa

On the flute (for real)...

Geraldinetheluckygoat

On the spoons...

Seeker
califraundingfathers (also kazoo and nose flute)

on the Zafira roof bars...

BecauseI'mworthit

on the typewriter/mouse...

lilymaid

on the jaw harp...

gentleotter

on the canary whistle...

sonofnibnabs

on knicker elastic...

daughterofsauerkraut

on the windows...

marymotherofcheeses (pvc)
treedelivery (sash)

on percussion...

custardo
jacksfirstchristmasmama
sunnygirl1412

whistlingl...

smilesslikenoo ther

genuine musicality...

asdmumandteacher

Original lyrics...

teafortwo

And er...

standing her toast up on its edges
JackieNo

All under the musical direction of...

dragonbrandybutter

What about the musical saw- I can play a few tunes on that. Oh and a bugle call on a garden hose.

But could also be in a group with asdmumandteacher as I
can also play clarinet (Post grade 8)
Recorder (grade 5)
Piano (grade 6)
Guitar (grade three)
Flute (grade 2)

You can add me in - clarinet (grade 8+), and I used to be able to play the piano (got grade 7, but then gave up, so don't count on me for much in that department!)

Can I sit next to you smartiejake, in the clarinet section??

Definitely

Thank you - you can have a prong of my clarinet stand, should you forget to bring your own. Oh, and I always remember to bring the section pencil...