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This forum is the home of Mumsnet classic threads.

Mumsnet classics

I am a twat, I am a twat

167 replies

differentID · 21/09/2009 20:25

yes, please all come and point at this twat in the corner!

My dh has just come in from work and noticed the iron was on.

I didn't unplug it after using it this morning before 8am, and didn't even realise though I have been home for 2 hours!

Can anyone beat that or just come and point and laugh at me please?

OP posts:

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Borntobeamum · 26/09/2018 14:06

I put a pan of carrots on to cook.
Took the children to soft play and ordered lunch. We had a lovely time...... Until I remembered the carrots
Bundled the children back into the car and flew home.
Black carrots. Black pan, but everything else was OK.

GulagsMyArse · 01/10/2018 15:29

Left electric hob on all night. Kitchen like the tropics next morning.

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 01/10/2018 15:46

@Gulags

or the Bake Off tent 😂😂😂

Saker · 01/10/2018 18:31

I left a saucepan with eggs boiling on the hob in a holiday house. We went out for 2 hours and when we came back we could hear the smoke alarm going. Even then I didn't click what I had done. The pan was black and everywhere was full of smoke. We spend the remaining two days with all the doors and windows open, scrubbing out cupboards, hanging out soft furnishings, trying desperately to get rid of the smell. Offered to go home early so they could fumigate better but the owners were really nice about it. It was a lovely house but I am too ashamed to ever go back.

CutesyUserName · 02/10/2018 16:01

When we first got married we rented a house into which the landlord had just put a brand new shiny ceramic hob. The first night, I managed to melt my phone on it (still don't know how) and ruined both items.

Another - the day before we moved out of a house we had just sold, I put a hot iron on the windowsill next to the window pane and cracked the double glazed glass :(

My dad had had a beige, lightweight suit made for him. When he got it home, I decided to iron the trousers for him as a surprise and managed to burn a hole straight through the lower leg. The thermostat on the iron had decided to die and I hadn't realised.

blueangel1 · 04/10/2018 17:01

My worst example of twattery was just after I learnt to drive. I took the car into the city centre and left it in a multi-story car park. Whilst on the bus home I realised that I'd driven there.

I thank you

Berimbolo · 22/10/2018 20:03

I have form for leaving keys in places I shouldn't:

Left car keys in ignition when parked in a busy car park

Took time to put a chain, disc lock and steering lock whilst out on my motorbike, but walked off leaving keys on the bike

Left my keys hanging out the front door, but also done that with the DH keys which contains the obvious fob for his rather expensive car

Luckily all vehicles have still been there

tinofbeans · 20/01/2019 20:40

I have spilt a cup of tea all over my lovey MacBook I am also a twat.

SusanneLinder · 24/01/2019 13:07

I left my newborn baby in a pram outside a shop... Then wondered where she was. ( this was late 80s so was common to leave babies outside shops).

She is nearly 30 now and survived my dreadful parenting...

usandbmake3 · 25/01/2019 13:22

I came out of my house to realise that my car had been stolen.

Reported it to the police, called my BF in tears and asked him to drive back from work (he was 3 hours away on a course), cancelled my plans for the day.

Decided to walk to the supermarket to pick up some treats...and noticed my car in the car park where I had left it the night before.

Had to phone the police back and blamed the BF for taking it without letting me know.

Then had a phone call from Victim Support the following week to see if I needed to talk through any fears I had following my recent crime incident

barneymcgroo · 27/01/2019 22:24

Spent 3 weeks trying to sort out the terrible smell near the back door. Honestly, it smelt like something had died. Got someone in to do the drains - he came and put his head round the kitchen door: "could it be this?", he said, brandishing a long-defrosted frozen chicken. Was mortified. Twat.

Evennow · 03/02/2019 23:58

Decanted paint stripper into a polystyrene cup...

LaBelleSauvage · 28/02/2019 18:03

I put my engagement ring in the pocket of my scrubs and threw them into the laundry bins after surgery.

I spent 2 hours fishing through bloody, shitty, scrubs to get it back.

M4J4 · 01/03/2019 10:20

@usandbmake3

Reported it to the police, called my BF in tears and asked him to drive back from work (he was 3 hours away on a course)

What was your BF supposed to do about your stolen car? I realise that it's a lighthearted thread but this strikes me as a very selfish thing to do. Especially as he was 3 hours away on a course.

DumbleDork · 03/03/2019 07:57

I’ve left my car keys in the ignition overnight once when my youngest was newborn. Only noticed the next day when I couldn’t find them to take my biggest to school.

Luckily car was still there the next day plus all the contents

CigarsofthePharoahs · 19/04/2019 12:44

Bought a special box for keeping potatoes in to free up room in the fridge. Put potatoes in box.
Then I forgot about the box.

Had numerous conversations with DH about all the midges in the kitchen. Numerous. Eventually spotted the box and did at least think to take it outside to open it. It was thick with insects and larvae and the potatoes were sludge. I jet washed it out and then threw away the box.

DH has - left the trailer key in a box whilst packing after camping and been unable to hitch the trailer as key is now buried at the bottom of the trailer. He also left a damp flannel in a tent pocket when packing up. That was minging when we eventually discovered it.
I have left numerous front doors open and memorably my car was unlocked for an entire week. I think I need a responsible adult.

highheelsandbobblehats · 21/04/2019 20:51

I managed to lock my house keys in my car and my car keys in the house one day.
Went to get the kids coats out of the boot before the school run, chucked house keys into the boot as I did it. Closed boot, hung car keys back up in the house and shouted goodbye to husband as I pulled the door shut and went out on the school run.
Dropped DS1 at school and DS2 at the adjoining preschool. Put the buggy in the buggy park and rummaged in the basket for my house keys. Not there. Nor was my phone as I'd left that at home too.
Thankfully my best friend was stood next to me as it dawned on me what I'd done. I rang my husband (who was by now at work 25 miles away) from her phone to tell him what I'd done, I then borrowed her car to drive to his work to collect his house keys so I could get back in.
I gave said friend a spare set of keys the next day.

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