Page 13 | Omg what do I do now?

user1476613140 · 20/02/2026 10:48

It's not everyone that's into the pirate look. Fair do's.

MikeRafone · 20/02/2026 10:51

chocolatemuffin75 · 19/02/2026 22:04

I’ve been chatting to someone online for the past week, we have arranged to meet tomorrow, he’s just informed me he’s uploaded another photo of himself, as his others were not very clear and quite far away, my god he’s awful, I know looks aren’t everything but I just can’t meet him, Why couldn’t he have posted this one in the first place! He just looks so scruffy with a stubbly beard which I hate, his other photos are obviously older. How do I tell him I don’t wish to meet now? I feel a right cow but I just can’t meet him.

You're not a right cow - you've been hoodwinked by older photos. As you say why couldn't he have been truthful from the start, instead he has lied and that is totally on him and mot in the slightest on you

user1492757084 · 20/02/2026 10:52

I'd still go, Op.
Meeting him will give you a real reason to like him, or not.
You will either feel a romantic connection, or not.
That is a kinder revelation to give him, as to why you will discontinue seeing him.
And it might be that you like him and his looks are Daniel Craig rugged rather than scruffy.

BecauseYoureWorthIt · 20/02/2026 10:53

UniquePinkSwan · 20/02/2026 08:43

It’s him that will have dodged a bullet

Oh come on, “dodged a bullet” because she isn’t attracted to him? 🙄

MikeRafone · 20/02/2026 10:53

https://www.boredpanda.com/funny-ordered-vs-got-pics/

its just not funny....

50 Hilarious Experiences Of People Receiving Not What They Had Ordered

Why are people still trusting websites like Shein?. Fails, Funny

https://www.boredpanda.com/funny-ordered-vs-got-pics/

Gloriia · 20/02/2026 10:58

user1492757084 · 20/02/2026 10:52

I'd still go, Op.
Meeting him will give you a real reason to like him, or not.
You will either feel a romantic connection, or not.
That is a kinder revelation to give him, as to why you will discontinue seeing him.
And it might be that you like him and his looks are Daniel Craig rugged rather than scruffy.

She's cancelled.

HeadDeskHeadDesk · 20/02/2026 11:05

chocolatemuffin75 · 19/02/2026 22:19

Yes I’m serious he just looks really scruffy, I mean he could be a lovely person, but to be honest our conversations weren’t exactly great anyway.

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Okay so when you thought he was better looking you didn't mind that the conversations were a bit shit. 😂

Disturbia81 · 20/02/2026 11:06

HeadDeskHeadDesk · 20/02/2026 11:05

Okay so when you thought he was better looking you didn't mind that the conversations were a bit shit. 😂

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Well might have been good for a few dates and some sex.

allthingsinmoderation · 20/02/2026 11:10

it's your choice wether to meet him or not.
If you have decided not after seeing amore candid photo of him, thats your prerogative.
Sometime people look better IRL than an unflattering photo but bottom line is it's up to you.

MrFluffyDogIsMyBestFriend · 20/02/2026 11:11

Why were you planning to meet someone you didn't have good conversations with and couldn't see properly?

Original poster

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 11:13

Disturbia81 · 20/02/2026 11:06

Well might have been good for a few dates and some sex.

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Not what I’m looking for though and I couldn’t have sex with someone I’m not attracted too.

OP posts:

Original poster

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 11:13

MrFluffyDogIsMyBestFriend · 20/02/2026 11:11

Why were you planning to meet someone you didn't have good conversations with and couldn't see properly?

Because I’m bonkers

OP posts:

Original poster

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 11:14

HeadDeskHeadDesk · 20/02/2026 11:05

Okay so when you thought he was better looking you didn't mind that the conversations were a bit shit. 😂

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I’ve never thought he was better looking though.

OP posts:

dentalflosser · 20/02/2026 11:15

I haven’t read the whole thread yet but years ago when I was internet dating (the dark days of no smartphones) I was chatting with a man who was very nice, handsome photos, said he was the MD of a large company. Met up with him to discover his photos must have been taken about 15 years previously, he still lived with his Mum, his company was a tiny building firm doing property development but none of the developed houses had sold and he was in debt up to his eyeballs.
If he had been truthful I would have been fine about all of it, but I can’t cope with lying. It’s a huge red flag for me.

queenofthebongo · 20/02/2026 11:18

chocolatemuffin75 · 19/02/2026 22:15

No he’s just messaged saying I might not recognise him as he’s grown some whiskers.

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Surely the easiest thing is to reply to this message and say you are not keen on beards and whiskers. Either take a rain check at this point or warn him anyway and see how it goes.
But warn him now - he has said I have grown a beard so your next message should say -" ooh I only like clean shaven. Not sure this will work." It's not impolite...

jjourneys · 20/02/2026 11:18

The pics (and mental picture) of my now other half I went by on his Tinder profile are VERY different to the actual man I’ve now been with the last 12 years! I imagined him to be ex-Forces and he was anything but!

Go for the date, it doesn’t hurt. x

Araminta1003 · 20/02/2026 11:22

Has it occurred to you that recently growing a beard may be because he read somewhere that that is fashionable? And might not be his thing really either. If it’s because he is shoddy and lazy to shave that’s one thing. If it’s to be like a trend like the gym trend, it’s another thing entirely.

Original poster

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 11:23

dentalflosser · 20/02/2026 11:15

I haven’t read the whole thread yet but years ago when I was internet dating (the dark days of no smartphones) I was chatting with a man who was very nice, handsome photos, said he was the MD of a large company. Met up with him to discover his photos must have been taken about 15 years previously, he still lived with his Mum, his company was a tiny building firm doing property development but none of the developed houses had sold and he was in debt up to his eyeballs.
If he had been truthful I would have been fine about all of it, but I can’t cope with lying. It’s a huge red flag for me.

It’s a tricky one as in one sense he has lied, but by posting a very new photo just before we were due to meet has kind of worked in his favour or so he thought, what I mean is he probably thinks oh I should be honest with her and post a new photo, but it’s to late for me.

OP posts:

Disturbia81 · 20/02/2026 11:24

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 11:13

Not what I’m looking for though and I couldn’t have sex with someone I’m not attracted too.

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No of course you can’t have sex with someone you’re not attracted to, I was replying to someone else.
I meant the conversation not being great wouldn’t have been an issue if you were just looking for a bit of fun with a good looking man.

Araminta1003 · 20/02/2026 11:26

Jacob Elordi had a beard in the first part of Wuthering Heights but then not later on. It makes a huge difference to appearance. But clearly it can be shaven off. If he is otherwise good looking apart from the beard I would go. Tell him to send you another pic pre beard.

MeMeMeMeOw · 20/02/2026 11:27

BecauseYoureWorthIt · 20/02/2026 10:53

Oh come on, “dodged a bullet” because she isn’t attracted to him? 🙄

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God the hyperbole on here is off the scale isn't it?

Original poster

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 11:27

Araminta1003 · 20/02/2026 11:22

Has it occurred to you that recently growing a beard may be because he read somewhere that that is fashionable? And might not be his thing really either. If it’s because he is shoddy and lazy to shave that’s one thing. If it’s to be like a trend like the gym trend, it’s another thing entirely.

Again that’s up to him, but it’s not my cup of tea, if someone doesn’t like a certain look they shouldn’t have it just because it’s fashionable, I mean these wide leg jeans seem to be really fashionable at the moment with women, but you wouldn’t catch me wearing them.

OP posts:

MeMeMeMeOw · 20/02/2026 11:27

Araminta1003 · 20/02/2026 11:26

Jacob Elordi had a beard in the first part of Wuthering Heights but then not later on. It makes a huge difference to appearance. But clearly it can be shaven off. If he is otherwise good looking apart from the beard I would go. Tell him to send you another pic pre beard.

And he looked like Jesus Christ after he'd been at a festival for a week. In later scenes he looked like my ex though.

nomas · 20/02/2026 11:29

Araminta1003 · 20/02/2026 11:22

Has it occurred to you that recently growing a beard may be because he read somewhere that that is fashionable? And might not be his thing really either. If it’s because he is shoddy and lazy to shave that’s one thing. If it’s to be like a trend like the gym trend, it’s another thing entirely.

The picture is 8 years old, he misled OP until he thought she was in the bag.

She should ditch him, not reward him with a date.

ChickNorris · 20/02/2026 11:33

Araminta1003 · 20/02/2026 11:26

Jacob Elordi had a beard in the first part of Wuthering Heights but then not later on. It makes a huge difference to appearance. But clearly it can be shaven off. If he is otherwise good looking apart from the beard I would go. Tell him to send you another pic pre beard.

Haha, I think that it'd be easy to tell if someone has the potential of Jacob Elordi!
I know what you're trying to say with your analogy I'm just not sure it works here.