I’ve name changed for this because the background is incredibly outing.
I have a date tonight with someone I’ve liked for YEARS but I am absolutely bricking it.
We knew each other as children, we used to dance together. We did ballroom and competed so spent a LOT of time together and were very close, stayed close during our teens, then we went to separate universities and stayed in touch.
we had a falling out when I stopped dancing and he wanted to continue and didn’t speak for several years, then got talking again - by which point we were both married to other people. We stayed very loosely in touch but not close like we used to be.
neither marriage worked out - nothing to do with each other.
We’ve been talking again, and he asked me out on a date/for a drink tonight and I’ve been really looking forward to it as I really like him.
the thing is I haven’t seen him for ages. I was always in amazing shape from dancing when I was younger, but while not in bad nick I’m not like I used to be. I feel old! And like I have nothing interesting to say. I’ve lost all my confidence and I’m worried I’ve built him up in my head over the years to be something he’s not.
i don’t know what’s wrong with me, I really like him. But I also just want to stay at home!!