Crackers you've read on MN

[MrsMarrio]

Just a bit of fun. I've read some really awful threads on MN, then there in the comments is that poster that says something hilarious. I've got a few stored in my head.

In relation to a cheat going to the OW - "they think the grass is greener on the other side because it's covered in bullshit'

A post about partner being friends with the opposite sex, someone told a story of their other half getting 'mentionitis' about another woman who turned out to be cheating

And my favourite, a poster had took back a guy after a few break ups to which someone responded 'that's like fishing shite out the toilet- just flush'.

Anybody else got comments stuck in their mind for any future reference that fits or just me

I'd almost forgotten about

I cry and cry when I read the Sistine Chapel one!

@BouncyMonk

I don’t know if this is really what you’re looking for, but I remember on a thread about famous people you fancy, someone said Cillian Murphy’s face looked like a freshly waxed vagina!

Oh blimey it made me laugh! Think about it every time he’s on telly!

That was me!

I'm so happy

Someone pointed out that you don't wax your vagina though (which is technically true)

There was a thread in style and beauty about a lady who had had a disastrous haircut, her hair had been hacked really short around her crown.

Her husband's response was that she looked liked she had been prepped for brain surgery.

The thread in which a man asked "would I be treated like this if I was a woman?" He'd been for a hospital appointment and, I think, had been left with his genitals exposed whilst staff did something else. He felt badly treated and violated. You can all imagine the replies. They were graphic, extensive and absolutely hilarious.

@ImnotCarolineHirons

Yes there is a poster who still has the name JesusintheCabbageVan

I always interchange cabbage van Jesus for campervan Jesus of Robbie fame.

Husband shuffling in the dressing gown of doom because he had a cold is my favourite

Always makes me laugh

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Oh I've just remembered a hilarious thread where a poster wanted ideas on what to buy lesbians for Christmas, must try and dig it out.

Thanks SunsetBeetch

I'd remembered the "your minge" quite wrong, how sad. People must be cringing for me

How about the poster who accused others of "Smacking F5 like a demented seal".
However my favourite thread of all time is Lemon Drizzle Cake.

I completely forget the context, but OP stated that her DH was from the country that basically invented gift giving. Someone replied with "Is your husband from the North Pole?"
I don't know why but that really tickled me 😂

@BillCar

Oh I've just remembered a hilarious thread where a poster wanted ideas on what to buy lesbians for Christmas, must try and dig it out.

I remember that one. Lots of suggestions, my favourites being lesbian jam, and lesbian teatowels.

This:

Oh, and some described David Cameron as looking like a "Freshly wanked cock." He was PM at the time.

Is so true it's painful. I have always wondered what does he remind me of and this is it! All shiny and purplish and slimy. .

@praepondero yes it's a very fitting description of him. A cock inside and out!

@CigarsofthePharoahs

How about the poster who accused others of "Smacking F5 like a demented seal". However my favourite thread of all time is Lemon Drizzle Cake.

That's how I found mumsnet! I was searching for lemon drizzle cake recipes and put something like 'lemon drizzle for pta or school bake sale' hoping to find a lower sugar/kid friendly recipie and found it so its my favourite thread of all time too.

Best thread this year 😁, the stuff that makes you snort into your tea balances out the wierd and grim side

Don't think it's been posted already but my absolute favourite was someone starting a thread asking for reviews of a particular buggy they were looking at. They needed it for xyz features. Got no replies.

Almost exactly to the day a year later, someone responded, saying 'yes, buggy is great, we use it for xyz and love it'.

Except it was the same poster, unknowingly replying to their own thread.

But the absolute icing on the cake that ended me was that the poster's username was 'ecco'

Posted too soon! People were replying saying 'is there an ecco in here?!'

The husband in Asda doing his usual T Rex impression lingers on in my memory.

@sparklfairy I remember that one, and some one posted "is there an ecco in here?" 😂

I haven’t had chance to read it all yet but I remember a poster saying that Jacob RM looks like he ‘ejaculates dust’ and I’ve never seen a more apt description

[quote Capodimonte]@sparklfairy I remember that one, and some one posted "is there an ecco in here?" 😂[/quote]
It was brilliant and such a weird perfect coincidence that I kept thinking it couldn't be real, but no troll is that dedicated to wait a whole year to actually orchestrate that

I fondly remember the multi-week saga of the couple who had taken up residence (and engaged in a some questionable recreational task) in a side road in their "Jizz Stinking Car." Gold star to the MNer who kept us updated on their "activities"!

@FromDespairToHere

My favourite thing I've ever read on here is a woman who went swimming and clearly had baby brain because she forgot to put her bottoms on. She sat on the side of the pool holding said baby and her DH hissed "Jane! Your minge!"

Properly laughing out loud!!! 😂