The wholesome village Facebook page 🙄

[AngelicaElizaAndPeggy]

What's kicking off on yours this evening? A police car has just been spotted by someone who has eagerly reported it on our page- everyone is now going nuts in the comments but secretly I know for a fact they're all really nosey and want to know if the kids have set fire to the bus stop again.

Last week the same kids were all named and shamed in some CCTV footage from someone's doorbell cam and it all became hugely messy.

A mum has also been selling Christmas glasses that look like they're full of gin but are actually candles. You can have your name written on for an extra fiver.

KNain I love it. Might even start a fairy tree here.

My local facebook page is currently retired people complaining about all the people they see out and about when they are out and about, people demanding that everyone stop being offended by their poppy and going off on one when people remind them that no one is in fact offended by their poppy and an ongoing and sadly personal argument about allotment allocation.

I have stayed a member of the facebook page for the area I moved out of a few months ago and it is almost entirely devoted now to a very bitter war about the planned lot traffic neighbourhood scheme. If I ever feel like being insulted and having my worth as a human being questioned I will go there and express a concern about the scheme, it seems that unless you are uncritically in favour of it as proposed you are evil.

@PatriciaPerch

there are always underpants by the river too

I laughed out loud at this. I don't use FB and am constantly reminded why, but this thread is just pure gold.

Knain I can picture the outrage ...

chocoalatesaltyballs22 Over lockdown, all the local villages including ours had covid pebble snakes. Once in a while a stone would go missing from it and there would be fb howls for it to be returned as their child was distraught not to see it there.

That's hilarious Kanin

I used to see coloured stones on the stone walls around my area and took me awhile to figure it

I'm sure the owners loved the random stones

We had a fairy tree during lockdown and pebbles it went horribly wrong and it got damaged was a shame but really was only a matter of Time.

I am jealous. We don't have a group. What we do have is a nostalgic piece of waffle called "NAME OF TOWN reborn" which is basically for people who used to live here in the olden days 1960s etc to reminisce about the "good old days" and post pointless things like "who remembers Denise's laundrette on the high street?"

On ours today a post about a missing disabled duck - having been raised in lockdown and it is dependent on its owners...... apparently can waddle is very friendly and if it nibbles your shoes means it wants a cuddle??

@Saz12 do you ever go onto the local large town FB page ? If you do can you let me know if Asda is open ?

Our Village page sounds the same as others. Dog poo, parking, litter. All fascinating it's quite handy for missing posts and parcels though.

We have
Students are evil because we will end up in Tier 2 or 3 cos evil students and their evil need for higher education
Leave the students alone, they're only trying to learn and it's the government's fault
Why no one knew Boris and Handcock (as he is referred to sometimes accidentally but sometimes not) were coming to our local hospital yesterday, there is a split of people who wanted to throw various dairy based missiles and sad they lost their chance and those arguing with the potential dairy missile throwers who wanted to congratulate him
Travellers. Always travellers. Now they're apparently on a mission to steal all the dogs, cats and anything else in the manner of a magpie
Thinly veiled racism about parking and those who park poorly.
The local old pool which would need millions spending on it and is not fit for purpose but the Green ward councillor (who is a twat) has caused such a frenzy over it that there will be sit ins at this rate, the council are building a lovely new pool next year but no, not good enough
Half term should be variously banned or extended until a vaccine
Local Halloween hunt instead of trick or treat so there's the ones after numbers to join in and those saying all of those with numbers are going to cause mass death due to spreading covid as people will expect sweeties.

Trick or Treat debates (this one tends to get nasty, a good read!)
Dog Pooh
Teenagers "trashing" the village (would never have happened in our day)
Some pinching a wheelie bin on bin day and putting their address on it
Parking
someone advertising a business on the wrong day
Cars soaking pedestrians with rain water
The state of the queue for McDonalds
The state of the queue for KFC
disgusting that we can't buy fireworks - how will my kids cope

The usual humdrum stuff, its all kicking off in our village lol

Crumpets, I fear we’re not in the same village.... nearest Asda is about 30 miles away.
But glad to know other villages have stray peacock problems!

Crumpets???! That was for #Frumpety...!

Breaking news just in on my local page. A mum has posted a picture of a big poop that someone has done at the top of the kids slide in the local park.
Opinion is divided between men/boys thinking it's hilarious and everyone else thinking it's disgusting.
That's pretty vile.

@Saz12

Crumpets, I fear we’re not in the same village.... nearest Asda is about 30 miles away. But glad to know other villages have stray peacock problems!

I leave early for work because we get peacocks on the roads several times a week

we had who are these children during the summer with photos they were just kids sitting on a blooming wall .
I knew the complainer and said Iremembered full well what they were up to at 13years old and it wasn't sitting on a wall !

Oh lordy. The poppy fascists have started already.
I might have to unfollow the group until Remembrance Day is over.

I joined one of these thinking it would have some stuff of local interest. I quickly left when I realised a few days later it was just a bunch of do-gooding curtain twitchers.

@Mydogmylife
Not anymore, but I grew up in The Mearns

OMG KNAIN, we have similar here. A whole trail of craft glitter and plastic crap littering a nature trail. Lots of stuff dangerous to the wildlife in the area. I may have cleared the worst of the metallic ribbon etc away into a bin myself
When it started to get seriously tatty and even more reminiscent of litter someone had dropped, a local woman who organises litter picks diplomatically offered to clean it up. My god, she deserved a Nobel prize for the way she handled it. The main litterer passively aggressively whined a bit but there was nothing really she could hang her moaning on. Previously she’d posted long rants about people not taking care of it, how she was doing it for the cheeeeldren, no one appreciated it why did she even bother?
It’s cold and muddy now. I doubt the proposed Halloween one will happen.

Our MP has a surgery here tomorrow. He's one of the Scottish Tories who against the extension of free school meals in England. He is a brown nosing party line toe-er and pretty damn high on the expenses list.
There is some "organising" going on.

Someone put two sacks of rubbish in someone else's bin and the bin men didn't take. It was the people at Number 10, but the person reorting it won't say which street. Several people who live at Number 10 have come on to say it wasn't them it was a different street.

I’m admin on our page,
Normal complaints are fireworks,
The local youth and kids setting fire to stuff!

The one we are dealing with this week are the free kids meals. We as a group have set this up and it’s offended a lot of people!
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