Great works of literature ruined by a single sentence

[Blandmum]

Idea stolen from the Time ed website

'Hey Godot, you're early!'

[filthymindedbolshevixen]

''I first met Dean not long after my wife and I split up. He was a boring tosser and I decided to not to meet him again''

On the Road

[RustyBear]

Merchant of Venice

"Hey Antonio, I can see your ships coming into harbour now!"

[filthymindedbolshevixen]

''Unpack the wagon folks - we just found us oil!!''

The Grapes of Wrath

[Blandmum]

'so in the end I decided to go to a Red Brick University inseatd'

Brideshead Revisited

[Pan]

Oedipus

"You look strangely familiar..."

[Threadworm]

"I'll just turn on the Sat Nav before we set off."

Odyssey

[CatIsSleepy]

The time traveller's wife

'Dad, this naked man just showed up in the garden'

'It's alright Clare, the police are already on their way, he won't bother us again'

[MrsBadger]

Twelfth Night:

'I know, we'll wear nametags'

[TinyGang]

Paris 'Actually, I'm gay'

[filthymindedbolshevixen]

''Dolores, you're a cute kid, but you're only 12 for god's sake. It would be perverted and immoral...''


Lolita

[filthymindedbolshevixen]

Ok, Max, you can come downstairs for your supper''

Where The Wild Things Are

[Blandmum]

'So in the end I decided not to go'

Around the world in 80 days

[ElenyaTuesday]

Angela's Ashes:

"My mother had many children but they all survived, my father was always employed and we had a very happy childhood."

[TinyGang]

The Picture of Dorian Grey

'Who left that bloody picture in the attic? I've just trodden on it looking for the Christmas decorations.'

[ElenyaTuesday]

Actually I take that back - no way is "Angela's Ashes" great literature............

[filthymindedbolshevixen]

''Zippitty doo dah, Zippity-yay, my oh my what a wonderful day!''

The Bell Jar

[Pan]

Moby Dick

"Fuck! Missed!"

[ElenyaTuesday]

From "Ruth" by Elizabeth Gaskell:

Ruth says: "Yes I'm unmarried and this is my illegitimate child - do you have a problem with that?"

[professorplum]

Cathy to Nelly

'I love Heathcliff and I always will. Of course I'm not going to marry Edgar'

[professorplum]

Cathy to Nelly

'I love Heathcliff and I always will. Of course I'm not going to marry Edgar'

[Pan]

Casandra to Agammemnon

"Just coz I've got a vagina, it doesn't mean I have to know EVERYTHING!!"

[ElenyaTuesday]

Dombey & Son.

Chapter 1:
Mr Dombey says: "Yes it's wonderful having a daughter - she is going to inherit my business you know."

The End

[Blandmum]

'Miss Brodie, I'm afraid you have failed another OFSTED inspection. I'm going to have to sack you'

[Threadworm]

Gregor Samsa woke up one morning to find that he had a bit of a hangover.