Great works of literature ruined by a single sentence

[Blandmum]

Idea stolen from the Time ed website

'Hey Godot, you're early!'

[Threadworm]

"Right," said K. "I've had enough of this. I'm reporting you to the Police Complaints Authority."

[newgirl]

Mrs Macbeth

'that soap worked a treat'

[Threadworm]

"That Mozart's a bright lad," mused Salieri. "It's so nice to see new talent coming along."

[Slubberdegullion]

In a hole in the ground there lived a Hobbit. Sadly because of Middle Earth global warming the hole flooded once a year so the Hobbit was forced to move out to a nice new build semi.

[Blandmum]

'In the end my mother realised she was co-dependent and got my father into a rehab programme, things got better after that'

A tree grows in Brooklyn

[edam]

'That Amelia Sedley's a drip, I'm turning down her invitation. I'm going to take Xenia's advice and start climing the career ladder instead. Today, governess, tomorrow my very own Academy for Young Gentlewomen!'


Becky Sharp, Vanity Fair.

[Slubberdegullion]

Sadly Lucy suffered for claustrophobia so decided against the wardrobe and hid ouside behind the big oak tree instead.

[edam]

climbing, oops.

[edam]

Fortunately for the Fossil sisters, Great Uncle Matthew returned from his trip a very wealthy man, so none of them ever had to work again.

Ballet Shoes

[Blandmum]

'Stop Press, small bear captured at Paddington Station, enquiry is called for at Heathrow security services'

[MrsWeasley]

Harry James Potter was a well loved boy who lived with his mum and Dad, who had been responsible for killing lord Voldermort when Harry was only 1.

[Blandmum]

'Thank goodness for the sprinker system'

Rebecca

[Twiglett]

"and then I joined Druggies Anonymous so we cancelled the road trip"

Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas

[motherinferior]

There was no possibility of taking a walk that day; at least for half an hour. Then it cleared up, and I joined my cousins for a ramble which was surprisingly companiable.

Jane Eyre.

I have just returned from visiting my landlord Mr Heathcliff, and I have to say I don't like him much. I'm also not keen on my housekeeper Nelly Dean. I think I'll catch the next train back to London.

Wuthering Heights.

[Twiglett]

MI did you see my salute to you further down

[motherinferior]

Oh yes, thank you, oh marmitey one

[Slubberdegullion]

"WTF is dust asked Lyra?"

"Sounds like a theological metaphor for original sin" said Pantalaimon

"Bollocks to that" said Lyra "Lets go and climb on some roofs"

[slowreader]

At the council of Elrond:

"An eagle has voluteered to pop over to Mordor with the ring tomorrow morning."

[Twiglett]

farkin' geeeeeeenious .. an eagle .. LOL

[Slubberdegullion]

Oooh slowreader contentious go and post that on the chat forum of The One Ring.com and you'll get a flamin' like even MN has never seen

[slowreader]

Mrs Cratchet:
"Nobody here likes turkey."

[Blandmum]

Dr Beeching is coming to Sodor tomorrow

[Blandmum]

'He's Sparticus!, Him over there, the one that looks like Kirk Douglas'

[MarsLady]

Of Mice and Men: George decided that Lennie needed to stay in residential care.

[MarsLady]

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife sadly Mr Darcy had just lost it all on the second horse in the 12.30 at Kempton!