Great works of literature ruined by a single sentence

[Blandmum]

Idea stolen from the Time ed website

'Hey Godot, you're early!'

Message withdrawn

Oh no, mud! Squelchy, squerchy mud!
We can't go under it, we can't go over it,we'll have to go through it!

Thank God we've got a fark off 4WD.

'Dearest Sara,' said Miss Minchin gently. 'You will never want for a home while Miss Amelia and I are alive.'

'A bit of earth?' repeated Archibald Craven. 'Of course.... I'll instruct Mrs Medlock to get you a grobag from the garden centre.'

I put him up for adoption yesterday honey
We don't have to talk about Kevin any more thank GOD
Loads of goodies on here but especial LOLOLOL at "art thou Elias?" "and he answered Yes", nice one torty

"Do drop in on Calypso, darling," said Penelope. "And don't forget the sat nav, and Odysseus darling..... take the dog."

Mrs Dalloway decided she couldn't be arsed, she telephoned everyone and cancelled the dinner party.

The sun is shining, everyone is happy, we are all tee-total and very interested in keep fit.
Raymond Carver, Short Stories.

I'm a happily married man, I adore my wife and my job is totally fulfilling. I remain a potent and valuable man.
Any book by John Updike.

Toronto? No, I grew up there. I see no reason to return.
Cat's Eye

God, I've got a memory like a sieve me.
Proust

OK chaps let's crack on, rolling stone gathers no moss, what? Chop chop

Richard II

Oh, OK, OK, since you asked so nicely, what happened next was ...

Thousand and One Nights

NO! NO!

(This is a very clever funny thread)

"Oh, we're still in Kansas"

"mummy there's a tiger at the door".

"Sophie what have I told you about strange tigers. Do not let him in"

oh Cinderella , I know the clock is striking but don't forget your shoe.

"so, I went to New York where I was very successful"

Toby Young, how to lose friends and alienate people (aware NOT great literature)

I thought of another Macbeth one ...

Oh, hello dear. Nice day? Really? Witches, oh yes dear. And Banquo? Banquo, the one who ... oh yes I know Banquo. Yes dear. Lovely dear. Yes dear I was listening. Lovely dear.

plus another ...

"No no, you seraphs are lovely, really you are, but my bum does look big in this, so no flattery please. And, sorry if I'm being prim but really should we be chatting away when we're meant to be praising? - seriously I don't think the boss likes it and I'd rather not upset Him."

Paradise Lost

I wander'd lonely as a cloud, and then I saw a bunch of my mates and we went to the pub.

This is my favourite thread EVER.

John Masefield, if he was a MNer:

"I must go down to the sales again"

"He said it's at the post office"

The 39 Steps

This thread's in chat, guys...

(I'm ruining this great thread with a single line - see what I did there?)

I will email MN Towers and ask them to move it Somewhere Else so it's saved for posterity, I think.

Otherwise there'll be bleating.

And ROFL at it!

In Xanadu, did Kubla Khan,
A stately pleasure dome decree
For the millenium, and turned it into a whoppingly huge casino

Cold Comfort Farm:

"Oh, I do so adore this rustic charm. Yes, it's a little impractical, but who cares about hot running water when you can enjoy that delicious scent wafting over from the sukebind? And what a lovely woodshed."