I can offer you solutions to all your problems

[pineapplebryanbrown]

I'm a non medically trained self appointed internet nurse. I have a very old useless degree in humanities from a poly therefore am completely unfettered by knowledge or training. Bring me your problems and I'll solve them.

getting That's true! I am (almost) cured, through the power of Thigh (without her even answering).

That is power of a rare sort, indeed.

getting no guests (spit) but sadly (bows head) many off shoot humans who are all living at home.

Reg bin bags preserve forensics and brown tape will have your fingerprints on (duh). Fuck me Reg i thought you had skillz?

Naked this is NOT AIBU! For the love of Baby Jesus! He'd be fucking crying in his manger if he heard that question.

Thigh .that is not like you , I get the message but its not like you, have you been taken over?

Naked, I speak for Thigh in the same way that an elf speaks for Santa. Santa might be busy, but he always gets everybody's messages. In the meantime, please talk to the funny little person with tights, a pot belly and hair growing out of the ears. It makes me feel a little bit special.

I see what Thigh has done. She has taken the unreasonableness away from me, I feel better now.

Also very special after chatting with the little person in tights with the hairy ears.

Naked the force is strong in you, almost too strong. You've converted so quickly, so easily.

Are you Chou En Lai?

DON'T LIE!!

Laska i did come over a bit unusual there, i couldn't wait for the frozen cheesecake to unfreeze and injured my brain. Are you safe? Is it safe?

No I'm Sagittarius

Classic deflection, you ARE Chou En Lai! We had Lau Kim Korn earlier and now this.

What's with all these Oriental 2nd in commands?

I know it's a carpet, i don't care.

WHERE IS HELLEN - is she safe?

Laska are you in the maze?

Im Out!! The had miraculous properties ..OK it meant Going Out again , but In this case I hope you will think its justified.. went over the wall, and down this passageway.. picking up Monster munch as I went to conserve strength.

Hot wired the car crashed the gates and I'm on the road!.However I dont think the stupid FBs even noticed, ( they are all snoring their fat little heads off)

Am looking for a secluded place to hide , have another nap and regroup .. but Ive discovered what the lights are (they are red , but dont look it in this photo) and am making my way in their general direction .. .. There must be civilisation and a proper bed , somewhere ..

I should be back with you in Thighland tomorrow .!!
.

Frozen Cheesecake .. (drools) ......

I've found some jelly babies (the only acceptable kind of baby) in the glove compartment , and I have bitten all their heads off .

That's the spirit, Laska!

Oh Laska Praise Be!!

You are safe after all. You're so amazingly brave. Well done on stealing a car, you deserve it. Remember to sing Born Free very loudly out of the car window. The song has echolocational qualities and will guide you home but not ignite your bones. Because that would be ridiculous.

没有

Naked very good! You're in, you took a pasting and you came back stronger. Welcome sister.

谢谢哦，太棒了

我很荣幸成为你的妹妹

我现在要喝茶和小吃

你现在是我们中的一员

(you are one of us now) as Laska may have limited wifi

I'm off for a nap in the knowledge that Laska is safe and sound. I won't be venturing to the river again

Going to to rest now after my adventure, car is all tucked away and i have found a place to sleep .. , but If some of you sing Born Free from Thighland, for me in the morning , I will hear the vibrations I am sure..

I'm so ill, i just heard the words. "chocolate and kale combined" on Bastardchef.

I'm not well due to frozen cheesecake chicanery and the trafficking incident. I'm off for a recreational bath xx

I too worry about the hills. It defies the laws of physics. Probably best to sacrifice her and focus on my own reverse improvement. She does sometimes visit too, so that kills two birds with one stone.