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I'm totally unreasonable. DH putting on a 'ill voice'.

275 replies

ThirdChildFourthPile · 24/10/2018 23:15

I know, I know I'm being unreasonable. And I've told myself a million times but it's still winding me up. I'm actually avoiding him because of it.

I'm 7 months pregnant, we have two kids.
He had a vasectomy today so I'm juggling the kids and uni and hospital appointments with this baby while he rests his testicals.
This, I have no problem with at all. It's been a long time coming! And the more he rests now, the better he will heal.

But the ill voice he is putting on is like nails down a black board.
He used to do it years ago, I haven't heard him 'put on' a voice in years. He used to put on this faint, wobbly voice whenever he had any ache or pain or cold. My sympathy used to instantly shrivel up.

Now he's putting on this small, high pitched little boy voice and it grates on my so much.
It's like pouring salt on my sympathy for his testicals. I really wish he wouldn't do it!

So I need to get it out here in this safe space where I can name change and move on.

OP posts:
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HereBirdies · 24/10/2018 23:34

Sorry, 37 weeker.

But sympathies OP, my DH is the only person EVER to ever get sick...

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TheFairyCaravan · 24/10/2018 23:36

You can't compare a vasectomy to a c-section ffs.

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DoJo · 24/10/2018 23:37

And if a woman had a c section, she should also suck it up and not whine or is it ok to be feeling shite after that particular surgical procedure?

Well, yes! You don't get to just lie watching TV and being waited on hand and foot on account of having a tiny baby to look after! When I was in hospital after mine, the midwives actively chivvied me along to get me up and about asap and I went home the next day to look after my kids and I STILL never busted out 'the voice' because I saved that for after I had had heart surgery and wanted my husband to go to the shop for lucozade! Grin

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LuckyDiamond · 24/10/2018 23:38

My friend’s ex would not only do the pathetic sick voice but text her from his bed to bring him hot drinks. They BOTH had the same cold virus.

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drinkygin · 24/10/2018 23:39

Valasca, he has had a very minor procedure, definitely not comparable to a c section which is major abdominal surgery-yes, which women are expected to just “get on with it” after! Usually looking after one of more infant plus other kids.
Also, they didn’t touch his testicles...tiny keyhole incision in the scrotum, tiny section of tubes snipped away, job done. In any case, they certainly didn’t touch his vocal cords, therefore no need for ridiculous infantile voice. HTH Smile

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drinkygin · 24/10/2018 23:40

Op you have my utmost sympathy. I would find that intolerable.

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chicken75 · 24/10/2018 23:40

Comparing a vasectomy to a c section Grin really? One is major surgery ffs

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Laine21 · 24/10/2018 23:43

have you thought he might actually be in pain?
ex DH was after his, the first side went fine, but then when it came to the second one, the surgeon had to 'rummage' to find the tube thing to cut and tie it off. as a result he had one very angry red and swollen one and developed an infection within days and he was really very sore and swollen.

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Sicario · 24/10/2018 23:44

Hey lovely OP! Maybe cut the guy some slack? He had a snipectomy TODAY (and when my DH did that his balls went black and swelled up like a pair of purple melons). God, we're such bitches... :)

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ThirdChildFourthPile · 24/10/2018 23:46

He is in pain! Of course he is, he's just had a cut to his conkers!

I've got him painkillers and sorted his cold compress and cooked his dinner and made him coffee just the way he likes it and offered him more besides to aid with his comfort.

Its just the voice that gets me.

OP posts:
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VisitorsEntrance · 24/10/2018 23:48

I would have sympathy as he has just had a small surgical procedure.
However the poorly voice makes me want to kill.

DH has just found out that he has to have a camera up the end of his cock. He has told me this is the WORST THING EVER. I reminded him that we had three rounds of IVF where the stick a needle up your foof, through the wall of your vagina and into your ovary. Nope, camera up your cock is still worse.

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Takemetovegas · 24/10/2018 23:48

Just to add to the fun. When I ever get sick rarely, be it a cold or something worse. I get a preemptive "sick boy" who wanders the house loudly testing body parts to check if he's got it yet.

Think "oh I think my throat feels a bit sore, do you think I'm getting what you have?" and "I just sneezed. I wonder if I've got what you have" and in a very confused, whiney sick boy voice "I wonder when I'll get it".

It absolutely grates me.

To his credit though, when he had his man pieces rearranged he was pretty good. Probably because I reminded him that I've had 3 pregnancies, 1 CS,a bilateral mastectomy and 7 reconstructive surgeries while still mostly looking after 3 DC.

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MooPointCowsOpinion · 24/10/2018 23:50

I’m with you OP, adults who are parents have to suck it up and get on as much as they can. If he’s got the ability to think through and enact a pathetic voice, he isn’t that injured. The really sick and injured don’t have time for that shit.

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Aquamarine1029 · 24/10/2018 23:52

A vasectomy is a very minor procedure, fgs. Of course soreness is involved but it doesn't even compare to major surgery or a cs. Throw him a bad of frozen peas and tell to get over himself.

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chaoscategorised · 24/10/2018 23:53

Mine does a "I feel woozy" bit in The Voice that makes me want to bite though a pillow. I have to leave the room and think very hard about why I love him and ignore it or he really plays into it. LTB 😂

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BewareOfDragons · 24/10/2018 23:55

HIlarious idiot comparing a vasectomy (tiny outpatient procedure, followed by lounging about and expected to nothing for the day) to a csection (major procedure, followed by the bonus of looking after and keeping a newborn alive, often without much help, and without complaint no matter how much pain the poor woman is in).

Get a feckin' grip, Valasca.

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UseditUpandWoreitOut · 24/10/2018 23:56

Fucks sake. Give the bloke a break and learn how to spell testicles.

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ThirdChildFourthPile · 24/10/2018 23:58

I have dyslexia. I will make a note of my misspelling but unfortunately I cannot promise that it will stick. Grin

OP posts:
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UseditUpandWoreitOut · 25/10/2018 00:00

Yeah, right. I believe you.

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Bowerbird5 · 25/10/2018 00:01

Valasca
Yep I had a baby in SCUBA and I was too ill to visit him. So my son was six days old before I saw him. We both nearly died due to incompetence. On the eighth day I was on my feet and on the tenth he was out and I had to bath him. When we got home I had to unpack because we had just moved 300 miles and nothing had been unpack because my husband didn’t know where to put it! He wondered why I cried when I had just got home and he wanted to start the unpacking.
I had an infection for four months which gunk drained out of a hole which I told them the stitch was too tight. I had no help because my husband had started a new job and I also looked after my eight year old sister because my mum was very ill in hospital. And guess what I just got on with it like most woman and didn’t put any silly voices on.
DH had a key hole surgery hernia op and said it must be like having a baby. I put him straight on that one. I threatened to jump on the bed if he didn’t shut up.
OP go get a naice bag of froze peas for his bits. Every time he put THe Voice on get the peas. He’ll soon stop.
I’m sure it is painful but the voice is too much. DH has done it when he had the flu. I had the flu but was still expected to feed the kids and carry on when he went back to work ( he works away for three weeks at a time) without help.

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StoppinBy · 25/10/2018 00:03

Haha - my hubby does this when he talks to his mum - she is far more sympathetic to her poor little boy (who by the way she thinks the sun shines out of lol) when he is 'sick' than me.

Toughen up DH as your sick voice don't work on me and like you OP it actually gives me the irrates….. my hubby tends to go to work when he can if he is a little sick as his workmates are more sympathetic and he gets to 'take it easy' while I am at sick doing all the same stuff as usual.

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shambahome1 · 25/10/2018 00:04

BOLLOCKS, as far as I can remember I drove home immediately after waking from the op, shagged Mrs Shamba thrice, went to the gym then climbed a mountain, but I am Brian Blessed.

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Candlelights2345 · 25/10/2018 00:09

Aaah ‘the voice’, I find it’s best ignored if at all possible.
Although it does give me the rage when accompanied by ‘I’ve got a much worse version of the xxx than you had’ Hmm
If my Dh ever did the cough with the tongue poking out, I’m not sure I could control myself !

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StoppinBy · 25/10/2018 00:14

Just read the other comments...…….. clearly Valasca you have not had a C/S - which by the way as far as I am aware is the only major surgery where once your numbness wears off and they remove your catheter you are expected to take care of another human being rather than other people taking care of you haha.

What clown compares the two and thinks that's a fair comparison... one of them they cut through, skin, fat, muscle and uterus then stitch it all up again, the other is two tiny nicks in the skin, pulling a tube through and either severing it or clamping said tube before replacing it. My hubby didn't even get stitches, just a tiny bit of glue.

I remember the burning nasty pain of getting up repeatedly to a newborn who is constantly feeding to get your milk in very very well - and no sleep either don't forget as you try to drag your ass out of bed every 20 minutes to settle bubs trying to use your cut in half tummy muscles to do so Hmm

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AcrossthePond55 · 25/10/2018 00:18

@VisitorsEntrance. My DH has had the cock camera 3 times in the last 4 months. Once for exam/diagnosis, once to remove the growth and biopsy, and just today to confirm they got all the cancer. He said embarrament of the stirrups was worse than the camera itself. He was up off the table in a trice for two of them. So don't let your DH pull the wool over your eyes if it’s just an exam. The procedure was under GA though and there was a recuperation period for that.

My DH does do the voice at times too though. After 30 years I’ve learnt to ignore it.

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