There is a lipstick going around in the washing machine that isn't mine.

[AManWalksIntoABarOuch]

100% certain dh is not having an affair so who does the lipstick belong to and how on earth will I get it out of the washing as the lid has come off (presumably in the machine) and I'm guessing it will be all over it now. Luckily it was a dark wash. I've stopped the washing machine and put it on drain.

My DD was complaining of having a lump on her arm. I poked and squeezed it and a piece of hard plastic came out.

Ugh. This thread is fantastic.

got laundered to a smelly little pebble - I love this ha ha ha and what a great phrase.

Has anyone else kept their DC's teeth ? I have a pot of them, not sure why.

I have my puppy's tooth in my shadowbox on the wall. It's kind of cool.

my DC once was walking a bit odd. there was a scab on the big toe obvs wondering why it was there I had a good look and a large rose thorn popped out when I pulled the scab off.

When I moved into my first house as a singleton and penniless, in the garage I found, wait for it..... 200 yellow rubber duckies and a temporary grave marker the size of a fridge for the previous owner's brother. OMG.

The ducks were for a charity duck race on the stream that runs through the park at the back. We had great fun lining the ducks up and down the path in the back garden for any kids around. They loved it.

No lipstick or teeth though.

I thought it was ok to share odd items found on your person and I've been cleaning so forgot to return I was in work, very bored and kept scratching my very old lump until a bloody little shell popped out, I was gutted when I lost it. The ENT specialist who xrayed me before my tonsillectomy (sp) found 4 beads and a pea by my adenoids

I swallowed an acorn once. Never to be seen again. Perhaps an oak tree with grow out of my forehead.

Shells though. Fucking shells!!

A bead?? Why do you have tiny foreign objects embedded into you Tribbled? Wtf happened?

This whole thread is excellent!

I’m going to have nightmares about this thread.

Well that sent me down a rabbit h9le of Sporn... two hours later, time for F.C. duties!

I had fine gravel in my left shin for years after a childhood cycling tumble and crap parental wound cleaning. It’s gradually working its way out in dribs and drabs. I occasionally find the razor catching on another bit when I shave my legs.

Holy shit! This is nuts.

My only contribution is that when we got our dog (ex racing greyhound) his belly was bald but lumpy and I assumed they were ingrown hairs. Until I erm exfoliated him and it turned out he's got thorns in his belly. Every couple weeks I hot cloth cleanse him and squeeze out the thorns. It's fucking brilliant.

That sounds like FUN Floella. Sporner envy.

In a war / refugee type situation, I wonder if it is possible to secrete the family jewels under the skin and have them emerge months / years later in safety?

This thread took an unusual turn

My friend at college had an earring that had merged with her ear so could be possible Anti.

Someone volunteer to test the theory. Troubled?

My DM had a large thorn in her leg for about 70 years. It got stuck in there when she fell off her bike when she was 6, and popped out a few years ago, whilst she was having a bath.

Aged 11 i was running through a field of thick thistles and stabbed my big toe, badly. Lots of blood, cleaned it up, thought nothing more about it.

Aged 32 i was climbing the stairs and felt an excruciating pain under my toe - cue massive thistle thorn! 3cm long and left a huge hole, weirdly no blood. Absolute sporngasm

@TroubledTribble28 HOW MANY peas and beAds????

This thread is amazing! lumpy scarf tissue this typo made me piss

I have a lump on my arm which randomly appeared and has been there for ages, maybe I should soak it and see if something comes out.

How, just how did this thread get here from a lipstick in the washing machine? I mean - HOW??

Anyone feeling lonely or just generally shitty about Christmas should come and read this thread.