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Original poster

Banged my head on a shop window.

289 replies

TheClaws · 11/01/2017 02:43

It was a classy jewellery shop, too. I bent closer to look at a ring, and banged smashed my head against the glass. All the shop assistants - they were five of them! - and customers turned around to stare. I continued to peer at the rings as if I didn't have a care in the world. Blush

Please let me know you've embarrassed yourselves too in public spaces, and not just me?

OP posts:
wishparry · 12/01/2017 21:14

When I was about 17,I got on the bus at Christmas time to do some late night Christmas shopping in town.the bus was packed,there was only one empty seat (those annoying flip down seats at the front)
I pulled the seat down and as I went to sit on it the bus driver pulled away and the wobbling of the bus moved my hand off the seat,so it flipped back up before I could sit on it and I ended up falling on my face in the middle of the aisle!
Every single person on the bus started to laugh hysterically for what felt like forever!I was too embarrassed to sit up and face them,so being young,foolish and humiliated I spent the rest of the 25 minute bus journey sat on the floor of the bus behind the wooden partition thing with my back resting against the stupid flippy seat.
and to add insult to injury,a man who got off the bus about 5 minutes before we reached town said to me really loudly as he passed me "you can get up now-they've stopped laughing", which set everybody off laughing again!Blush

jamdonut · 12/01/2017 21:27

Ohhhh...I haven't giggled so hysterically for a long time! DH thinks I've gone stark staring mad!
Love these. I don't really have anything as funny.
I was on a school swimming trip a couple of years ago, and always told the children to be careful of the slope down to the changing rooms. "Please don't run or you'll slip, with your wet feet" I called out to the year 3's...Only to go slipping and sliding myself and landed on my back with the children all looking wide-eyed and saying " Are you all right Mrs jamdonut?". Didn't know whether to laugh or cry!

pomers · 12/01/2017 21:30

I walked into a plate glass door at the local launderette -which I was using --because my bloody washer broke down-- . It made a real noise and my DH hasn't lived it down. In fairness they now have a stripe on it, so maybe I wasn't the first

Nimble2014 · 12/01/2017 21:38

I was standing on a tram once, and didn't realise how jerkily they move, so hadn't grabbed a handrail nearby. My friend was safely sat down. Anyway, the tram moves off and I lose my balance, and fall forwards.
As I'm falling I grab desperately for anything that will stop me. Which happened to be the crotch of a young man sitting over the aisle I fell into.
My friend saw everything, and started giggling at me, as I tried to apologise him without crying with laughter. The remainder of the journey, till we got off the tram, were the longest minutes of my life.

lynney88 · 12/01/2017 21:43

I am absolutely wetting myself! Grin

I crossed the road ( to get to the other side. LOL) but on the pavement was one of those big black and white roundabout signs. It was dark, it sat at headheight and the edge of the sign was black. Safe to say I wasn't steady on my feet after that.

My sister once split her head open in Specsavers where they used to have a little ramp running up to the window.

Took my son to a Halloween party whilst heavily pregnant and needed the loo. Came out of toilet and one of the little darlings had dropped something on the floor cue me ending up in the splits with my bump and dragging another pregnant woman down with me! I'm surprised we both didn't end up in hospital!

FruJustFru · 12/01/2017 21:54

I love the sound of Oldraver's "Foot and Moth Crisis" Grin

Original poster
TheClaws · 12/01/2017 22:13

FruFru As I don't live in the U.K., I didn't immediately twig to that and I was imagining something akin to a biblical locust plague....

OP posts:
Original poster
TheClaws · 12/01/2017 22:15

Wishparry that sounds like a comment an elderly person would make...

OP posts:
mja100 · 12/01/2017 22:18

I do daft things all the time but my best ones so far would be running into a posh bar to get out of the heavy rain, unfortunately running and wet floors don't go together and I slipped and ended up flat on my back in front of the bar!
The second one was going up a flight of stairs in a shop with a big bag on my shoulder, the bag slipped forward causing me to lose balance and end up essentially lying face down on the stairs and unceremoniously sliding down a few stairs on my tummy.
Oh, I've just remembered another one, I'm a teacher and was sitting on the end of my desk excitedly sharing something with my students, I went to get up, somehow managed to get one foot tangled in a chair leg and once again ended up face first sprawled in front of my class. They were 15/16 year olds and nobody dared laugh until I sprang up faster than I went down and had a giggle myself. News spread fast of the falling off my desk incident and I got lots of 'watch you don't fall miss' comments for a good few days!
Reading my (too long) post back I sound like a cross between Bridget jones and mr bean! Grin

DJBaggySmalls · 12/01/2017 22:19

There was a huge pyramid of plastic bottles of Five Pints in the supermarket and DS 3yo decided to be helpful and grab one
Another time I turned round and knocked over some wine in a display in the aisle.

They were really, really nice about it and I'm still allowed to shop there Blush

Cocolepew · 12/01/2017 22:25

I have posted this before and its not really a clumsy one…
I had to use metal weights to help with my pelvic floor. I insterted the biggest one, stood up, clenched, and it shot out and broke my toe.

wishparry · 12/01/2017 22:29

Theclaws, he wasn't elderly.he must have been around 30.

Cleorapter · 12/01/2017 22:32

Back in my early 20's I went to a 'cool' pub on a warm summer's day with a guy I fancied the pants off. This pub was, at best, described as rustic. The beer garden (more like a converted car park as there was no garden to speak of) was on a slant. After a few drinks I get a bit silly and comment on how the benches were like slides.

To illustrate this point, and to my date's amusement (or was it bewilderment?) I slid down the bench saying 'weeeee!'

I got splinters in my bum. Sad

Needless to say no one's pants came off that day.

And I still have the scars!

Cleorapter · 12/01/2017 22:33

disclaimer I was wearing underwear, just the sheer kind, the splinters went straight through them and my tights!

DavetheCat2001 · 12/01/2017 22:38

I fell out of a nightclub once..literally fell..down a whole flight of stairs, arse over tit with my male friend grasping desperately at my coat to try and stop me, out onto a packed street in Soho.

Another doctor friend who was there with us said I was lucky I was so pissed as sober I probably would have broken several bones!

Ruddy spectacular fall though, even if I do say so myself! Grin

weeza13 · 12/01/2017 22:48

I have fallen over backwards in the tube station whilst wearing huge backpack, struggled like an upturned tortoise to get up while people took photos. I walked into the side of a van that I thought was still moving as I crossed the road. I ran into a lamppost and actually knocked myself unconscious. I fell down a large hole when sneaking through roadworks on a drunken shortcut home- broke my knee. I fell asleep on a bench by a river and woke up with a huge leg jerk which unfortunately knocked a little girl off her bike. It looked like I kicked her on purpose and took a bit of explaining. Many many more of these but they do seem to be fewer these days as I don't go to the pub so often.

OhBlissOhJoy · 12/01/2017 22:57

Took some paperwork into my solicitors. Snooty and officious receptionist grilled me over everything before finally taking copies. Couldn't wait to get out of there so I flung open the door and marched straight into their stationery cupboard Blush

GinUrgentlyRequired · 12/01/2017 23:06

These are hilarious!

I was hurrying to catch up with friends ahead, whilst fishing in my bag for my purse, when I found myself flat on my back on the pavement (sober, I might add). Very busy street near UCL, students everywhere.Turned out I'd slipped on a banana skin! It was a proper slapstick moment. Highly amusing for my friends, passing students, and entire bus load of people watching...

sippingginandlemon · 12/01/2017 23:18

I have one, one that still makes me cringe.

It was a dark day in late November and very early evening so the light was dim.

I was BFeeding DS. Was quite new to it all. Found a quiet room at the back of a pub to feed him. Settled him after his feed in his car seat and I quickly and modestly turned to the wall and lifted up my top to sort the clips on the feeding bra and my pads. I was fully bare at this point.

I then realised I was in fact turned towards a window in full view of the road, the internal lights and the poor light outside had confused me.

To my horror not only was it in full view of the road, stopped at the red traffic lights immediately outside was a work van on its way home. Full of men with their jaws dropped.

I wanted to die.

TiredyMcTired · 12/01/2017 23:22

This thread has provided the best laugh I've had in ages!

When I was 18 (a looooooong time ago!) my new boyfriend, who I was utterly besotted with, bought tickets for us to go to a circus. When we got there a clown was running around with a massive feather duster trying to tickle people as they went inside the big top. When I saw him coming towards me I panicked and tried to get away by running up the steps to get to my seat. Was in such a rush I slipped and fell about 6ft through the gap under the seats into a heap on the ground underneath. People were pissing themselves as they thought it was part of the show. I was really badly bruised and had cuts but had to re-emerge from under the seats with as much dignity as I could muster. Still terrified of clowns now, evil buggers

ThanksForAllTheFish · 12/01/2017 23:44

The first time I went to Germany I decided to have a wander round the neighbourhood our hotel was in whilst DH was having a nap.

I spotted an Aldi. I was staring at whilst still walking thinking to myself,

'Oh look and Aldi, They look the just same as our Aldi, Is it closed? Do they close on a Sunday over here?, I wonder if they sell the same stuff, Maybe I should go in tomorrow for a look ....'

Next thing I know I've walked into a lamppost with enough force to bounce myself off it and straight onto my arse. I jumped up pretty sharpish and legged it back to the hotel trying to avoid eye contact with the man further up the street who witnessed the whole thing.

73kittycat73 · 13/01/2017 00:07

Cocolepew Sorry to hear about your toe but your story really made me Lol. Grin

sherlocke · 13/01/2017 00:29

As a teenager, I went on a school ski trip. I got really anxious getting the lift up the mountain - one of those ones that are like a bucket with automatic doors which open at the platform then close as they leave the platform, with everyone stood safely inside. Except I delayed following my friends on due to aforementioned anxiety, so as I took a leap of faith at the last minute, the door closed on me. One

sherlocke · 13/01/2017 00:31

Oops even clumsy posting! Blush

I was stuck one leg in and one leg out, properly squashed. They had to shut down the whole lift system to get me out, it was already off the platform over the safety net thing. Then a French woman shouted at me and I didn't understand a word.

sherlocke · 13/01/2017 00:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.