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to kill all the spiders?

997 replies

bessarabiantiger · 29/08/2015 16:17

We live in the country, we're very lucky with our house and we've been here two years. There's a lake on the property and with lakes come mosquito hoardes (fine, live and let live, we knew about this when ee took the place, and with mosquito hoardes come spiders.

I am alright with most types of spider, I allow Huntsman (? Spindly legged) in every room as they're no bother and keep the mossies down when we have the windows open. Brown recluse get ejected with a glass & cardboard or eaten by the cat.

This year we have a problem with false widows and a kind we've never seen before. They are awful. Striped and with extra long front legs, they shamble across the ceiling as if they're drunk & often fall in your drink/dinner/hair.

We now have around 80 of the fuckers in the kitchen. They are making nests. For many people this wouldn't even be an issue. But me being me I've said to myself, well the windows are open, they aren't scaring me on purpose (even after the night I walked into the kitchen without turning the lights on and had one who was making a web land on my face. ARGH!) Etc. Etc.

We've used every natural repellant going. From plug-in spider scarers (knew they were bullshit but was at wits end last sept) to conkers, peppermint oil, spider hoover, removing them all outside (shudder. That was a horrible day) only to find a new gang there in the morning.

After me and DH being bitten this week (him on the neck, me on the hand WHILST ASLEEP IN BED! Hand swelled up for the next 24 hours, yes, it was a spider, found it crawling down my leg) I have finally and very reluctantly bought spider poison.

I am hoping someone can offer a better solution before I have to use it. DS has mild asthma and am worried about the effect on him (we will evacuate for the day after use) and it's an aersol as well as a poison. It sounds silly, but I've only ever used aerosol twice- the ozone layer was so drummed into me at school it feels akin to pooping straight down a whales blow hole!

AIBU to kill the spiders so they stop biting us? Has anyone got any other solution?

We break webs and remove visible offenders bi-daily BTW.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
75
bessarabiantiger · 21/09/2015 11:19

Bugger.

OP posts:
EveryFrickingNameIsTaken · 21/09/2015 12:07

It was unexpectedly mesmerising. She's dragged whatever it is to the corner, I'm not sure if she's eating it or just showing it the sights.

Bess we didn't sing it while we were watching but I did start singing it when DS picked up the kitten to show her what was going on Grin

bessarabiantiger · 21/09/2015 12:29

www.google.co.uk/search?redir_esc=&client=ms-android-samsung&hl=en-GB&oe=utf-8&safe=images&q=tumblr+lion+king+translation&source=android-browser-suggest&qsubts=1442834760806#imgrc=13upTceI3L9kAM%3A

have no idea if this is true or not.

I never want to find out. Because I now sing the translation. It's funny every time...

OP posts:
tomatodizzymum · 22/09/2015 19:51

Grasshopper anyone? The dog was trying to play with it earlier. I put the knife there for perspective then it was put out of the way of inquisitive paws/jaws. Our dog usually picks things up in his mouth he sometimes gets hurt, especially when he tries it with the cat

c1.staticflickr.com/1/34/93528610_759798fe8d.jpg
The other image is not mine but the same species. We have giant rhino beetles as well, about the size of a computer mouse! If I snap a picture I will freak you out with that too Grin

to kill all the spiders?
FattyNinjaOwl · 22/09/2015 20:00

Grasshoppers don't bother me. And I haven't seen a spider since the kitten moved in...

dementedma · 22/09/2015 20:07

Ds says "How d'you like them apples?" I have no idea what it means.

bessarabiantiger · 22/09/2015 20:13

It means 'they don't like it up 'em' I believe.

I like a grasshopper. I keep trying to attach a pic of the best one I've ever seen. But it keeps failing & then I get bored & then Mumsnet all goes to shit & I give up.

I'm sad that we either become a lost biscuit or reach the thread limit soon, I'm hoping to get back here in time before either of those things happens. But time is an illusion innit...

...and lunchtime doubly so. :D

OP posts:
Spectre8 · 22/09/2015 20:19

well its been a few weeks as I have been completely spider free wohooooooo!

Wilhamenawonka · 22/09/2015 20:28

What have you started op?
There are now dozens of spider related threads - with pictures - crawling around mn.

WhoTheFIsJeff · 23/09/2015 06:47

We've had two gallopy fuckers already this morning.

DH squashes them but one appears in the same place every morning. You'd have thought they'd learnt by now.

FattyNinjaOwl · 23/09/2015 07:37

I spoke to soon....I saw the teeniest tiniest spider ever dangling from a web in front of my face when I was washing the bottles. That means that its huge mummy is somewhere... Argh!

Wilhamenawonka · 23/09/2015 11:34

Ladies I present a new wildlife danger..

The lesser spotted domestic bread maker.
A shy and retiring creature, it hides mainly on top of microwaves for months at a time.

When conditions are right ( no bread or money in the house) this magnificent beast
prowls the kitchen late at night looking, we think, for a mate.

Their mating rituals are rather violent as the following picture shows.

We know that this specimen is a female as it was carrying young. They have a gestation period of 3 hours so we can extrapolate that this young was a mere 30 minutes old when it's mother was killed.

The domestic bread maker is surprisingly mobile and can travel for up to a foot during it's gestational cycle.

The male has not yet been located.

Be warned. This domestic appliance can cause devastation in the right conditions (3:30am)

Wilhamenawonka · 23/09/2015 11:35

Look away now if you are of a nervous disposition...

Wilhamenawonka · 23/09/2015 11:36

(i bet fat Albert pushed it off the surface)

FattyNinjaOwl · 23/09/2015 12:33

Yep, that's definitely the work of fat Albert.

hudyerwheesht · 23/09/2015 14:15

Bloody hell wilhamena, that thing has caused chaos.

shadowfax07 · 23/09/2015 14:34

Wilhamena we've got a similar one which doesn't move, so it must have been fat Albert.

PS I've nominated this thread for Classics

Wilhamenawonka · 23/09/2015 16:07

I'm moving house now.
Any spider who can take on a bread maker and win can have the house.

tomatodizzymum · 23/09/2015 19:48

The kind of "spider" that does that kind of damage to my house looks like this but in yellow!

I would say move, fat alberts mutated you will come back so we know you are still alive won't you

to kill all the spiders?
Wilhamenawonka · 23/09/2015 19:55

I found remote control spiders in the pound shop today. They're everywhere!

FattyNinjaOwl · 23/09/2015 21:04

I saw giant hairy spiders in wilkos...
And cobwebs...

Wilhamenawonka · 23/09/2015 21:06

Nowhere is safe thanks to bess making us all hyper aware of this. Thanks for that!

tomatodizzymum · 23/09/2015 22:32

FattyNinjaOwl I saw something giant and hairy in Wilkos once but it wasn't a spider, unless spiders now wear string vests

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 23/09/2015 23:53

"DH squashes them but one appears in the same place every morning. You'd have thought they'd learnt by now."

YY - like I said upthread, friends and family all turn up for the funeral, or in your case, to see where their fellow spider has gone. Remember that they usually have a LOT of siblings too...

That breadmaker is a vicious beast, isn't it? I'm glad I don't have one!

FattyNinjaOwl · 24/09/2015 00:18

Eew tomato I did not need that imagery! I am now imagining spiders wearing string vests! Kind of like rab c nesbit with 8 legs.