What the bloody hell is this creature in my outhouse?? [pic]

[CountryMummy1]

Just been outside the feed the cat who has his food in the outhouse. There, hanging from the old pipework are 3 absolutely huge cocoons. They are hideous! Black and more than 4 inches long. They weren't there yesterday. What the hell is going to come out? AIBU to be very worried?

If it is a fungus then I would like it to be known that I called it first on page one and I claim my prize there is a prize right??

The prize is that the OP sends you one of them

Prize is- you win the fungus.

Congrats

Ha ha

I think it looks like a fungus of some sort?

In the words of Berlusconi's inner monologue, "Fuck That"

I graciously decline.

pro advice on vine it seems vine.co/v/M3Ij2xZXU63

You are going to have to set fire to your outhouse. Possibly your house, all your belongings, and basically the rest of the midlands as well.

It's the only way to be sure.

parasitic ZOMBIE FUNGUS en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ophiocordyceps_unilateralis

Now he thinks it is a fungus (after lots of vague muttering and beard stroking)
after a very close look, there does seem to be some sort of mouldy stuff around it

Perhaps they're truffles.....wall truffles

It's getting worse! Spores in my lungs?!?! I'm going to have to dig out DH's face mask thingy aren't I

Mmm, tasty wall truffles

something hatched out of this black knot fungus www.flickr.com/photos/28511931@N07/6823349277

Dh says basically the entire neighbourhood is doomed once the thing ruptures.

hidden - really ?

No

If it is a fungus, it can spread spores though. These can be inhaled.

I guess they'd have to be carefully removed if they are fungus.

www.amanita-photolibrary.co.uk/HTML_BG_Fungi/x/x/48daldinia_concentrica.htm like this one. The size seems right too?

That zombie fungus link is scary!!! Well, I've certainly learnt a lot (of things I didn't want to know about) on this thread tonight

Poo fungus.

farm8.staticflickr.com/7055/6831089816_66ba470026_z_d.jpg

This is a better photo, more like the op

It's ok. I've phoned the RAF. They are going to bomb your house in the morning.

'The ant is no longer able to control the muscles of the mandible and will remain fixed in place. This lockjaw trait is popularly known as the death grip, and is essential in the fungus's lifecycle.
The fungus then kills the ant, and continues to grow as its hyphae invade more soft tissues and structurally fortify the ant's exoskeleton.More mycelia then sprout out of the ant, and securely anchor it to the plant substrate while secreting antimicrobials to ward off competition. When the fungus is ready to reproduce, its fruiting bodies grow from the ant's head and rupture, releasing the spores. This process takes four to ten days.'

don't breathe in the spores!

I thought fungi grew in soil or on rotting wood.
Not pipes.
hidden - you really got me there

Fungi can grow anywhere damp.

I had some between my toes.