What the bloody hell is this creature in my outhouse?? [pic]

[CountryMummy1]

Just been outside the feed the cat who has his food in the outhouse. There, hanging from the old pipework are 3 absolutely huge cocoons. They are hideous! Black and more than 4 inches long. They weren't there yesterday. What the hell is going to come out? AIBU to be very worried?

So earwigs live in fungi ... makes sense! They're evil looking bastards

Still laughing at the rabbit being moved across the fields by the maggots, have this image in my head of them going "heave" and moving it another inch or so

a sparrow hawk landed about six feet in front of me with a live starling in its claws

I work across 2 sites in my current job. On the second week in my this job, I visited the other site and saw 2 seagulls pulling a duckling apart (to eat) outside my office

emmeline,

I am not certain if they have ears

who needs ears

they have evil looking pincer things and 2 penises
woah

But, but...why does such a thing as this evil fungus exist? What is the point of its existence? Where's Darwin when you need him?

PS: DH's cat once ate a length of tinsel. He had to gently pull it about a cm a day until it was all out. Cats are idiots.

2 penises ? why?
poor earwigs, it must be like permanently tied to 2 magnets, and you can't do anything about it.
No wonder they scuttle.

I listen to the owls hunting in my back garden. Mice squeak like buggery when they are picked up.
They tear the mouse to bits and slivers of mouse end up on my windows.
A dog fox wees on my wall.
Stinks.

PS: DH's cat once ate a length of tinsel. He had to gently pull it about a cm a day until it was all out. Cats are idiots.

Our puppy did the same with a bandage, only it wasn't centimetres we had to trim each day. I think there was something like 8 feet of bandage in there. I can still remember him gambolling around in the park trailing several feet of it (brown tint, naturally) behind him.

I'm still a bit concerned my cat is going to grow two more legs.

Fuck me. We've just offered on a rural property, surrounded by fields and with a huge outhouse. I'm withdrawing the offer and staying in the city. I'd rather take my chances with the smog and pollution than alien mould and mobile dead maggoty bunny corpses.

There are no handy convenience stores in the sticks, Queen. It is a chore having to get in a car every time you need a pint of milk or emergency munchies. Stick with the city.

Whooooooooo just seen that we've been moved to classics!!! Will have to post more regularly about my countryside horrors Thanks all xx

Oh Dust HaHaHa
Country please do

gamobolling around in the park

ffs gambolling
bedtime

MrsD your DH probably said mycelium? The mycelium is the fungal network - the body of it - that is underground or within the wood or whatever. The 'mushroom' is the fruit body that the fungus produces to spread spores. He's right that destroying the fruit body (ie the alien black fungus) won't destroy the mycelium.

Dust bunny, a valid point. What do rural folk do when they run out of wine at 10.45pm?

Well, you are already over the limit so you either stop drinking or you move onto the Lidl Sherry that your mad aunty Mabel gave you for Christmas 3 years ago or the Ouzo you brought back from Greece in 1998. Or you get better at stocking up to match your (realistic, honest) consumption levels.

Their wings are shaped like ears, hence name. At least that's what Enid Blyton told us