To Kick These People Out #3 - the countdown begins

[FuckYouChrisAndThatHorse]

The Beginning

The Middle

The end?

So... Long story short... There are horses, soon there should not be (I'm not good at summaries, they make me sound unreasonable).

We have a date! This Saturday! The horses should be taken away to pastures new, so we can roam the meadow in gingham dresses (dh looks good in a gingham dress) and we can have FuckYouFestivals to our heart's content.

There will be choirs and drums and bands and weapons and stackable goats and so much more!

Anyone who's read the threads knows I love a lurker. I can you see you out there. Go on, jump in while the thread's all new and shiny. You know you want to

mistle. My DC wear socks with their sandals . they even pull the socks up to their knees given half a chance. They will also try and do up the top button on clothes. The resultant outfit is interesting they look like total tits.

Lego, oh dear. Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. I'm not sure about that at all. Tell you what. I'll allow the socks and sandals as long as they are toe socks. Then they will look like they have cute monster feet. Deal?

Toe socks really creep me out, but not as much as those weird toed running shoes

mistlethrush Oh, I'd remembered, but part of my offerings for FYF is whinging incessantly about the cold. I'll camp, but I'll also drive you all batshit insane.

AlpacaLypse Oh, that's so lovely of you! One question though, where's Wiltshire? Can I get a train or a bus there? I'm not bringing boxing kangaroos (because they're much too big to fit in my carry on) but if the Rottnest authorities don't catch me I'll bring a quokka or two. I love Nirvana, can belt out Bon Jovi with the best of them and will made up Very Rude Lyrics to 1D. I can also offer lots of German dance metal and Johnny Cash.

If I ever do make it, Chris I will bake you Anzacs and maybe your stress levels will sink a bit. It's hard to be stressed with a warm Anzac and a big cup of milk. But only full cream. None of this hi-lo shit.

Thomas, remind me, what are quokkas? Do they mind being licked by the dog, and do they object to Jon Bloody Jovi? (I object to Jon Bloody Jovi but I promised to let them share the playlist equally, shot myself in the foot there!)

And Wiltshire is the bit about an hour and half along the M4 from London, turn left just past the TV worthy floods. We've been flooded since Christmas, but since very few people who work for the BBC live here, we haven't been on TV much.

Thomas, sounds good to me :) Johnny Cash? Dh is going to love you! Practice some inventively Australian whinging. I want to hear a lot of, "blimey, it's colder than a sharks testicle that's been dropped in the beer cooler!" Or some such. And you may have to call us all Sheilas and Galahs in no way guilty of perpetuating national stereotypes

Ida, oh god no, not the shoes. Dh thinks they look really comfy and wants a pair, I think I'd have to divorce him

I had no idea Wiltshire was flooded!

And yes you can get a train. Although the road between here and the station had several floods on it earlier, also two fallen trees.

Quokkas!

I have no idea if they'd mind, but they might have tiny quokka heart attacks, I don't know.

Since Perth has been on fire recently (and still is, in parts) there's nothing at all about English anything. Floods, politicians...nada. Just crackly bush and more lost houses.

I hope your house is alright though I've never been flooded except when it rained inside one winter and that was bad enough...

How does "It's hell cold. Fuck me, it's cold. Fuck me sideways with a frying pan, are you all fucking eskimos? Are you not fucking cold? Why are your doonas not fucking massive?"

Also I'll call everyone "mate" and "darl." Just for you. And "cobber" if you're irritating me. Might even dig out my old barmah and bring a drizabone.

AlpacaLypse That sounds fecking terrible how does that not make it onto the news?

Right. I HAVE to go and sleep now. I shall return in the wee hours of your morning and leave poorly spelt replies for you!

Bits are. Like most of the West Country. In all fairness, we don't have the great acreages of standing water, and very few families have been actually forced out of their homes. We're still 4 inches above the danger zone here, but it's shot up in the last 24 hours and we're keeping a very close eye on things.

Some friends of mine are surrounded by the standing water, and the sewers have all given up. It mings and they have had to construct a bridge out of old scaffold planks to get in and out.

Loads of xposts!

Can we have a fudge bar please? I will do practically anything for good fudge (a fact of which DH has been known to take advantage).

OMG they're so CUTE!!!!!!!

Thanks Thomas, sleep well.

Can't get the idea of stackable goats out of my head....

I think I want a set in green for the garden and a set in the playroom (assuming they are inanimate and not some amazing new breed and thus showing my total ignorance of all things goat).

Am I the only one who would still eat the cheesecake after the cat had licked it?

No MissHobart you are not the only one

Very cute

cheezburger.com/418252544

misshobart, you're not alone.

Alpaca, hope the wind isn't making it all worse. It's horrendous here. Work and schools closed early and trees are down all over. 100mph winds expected. Phone line and internet and lights all keep going out.

Downtheroad, they are this year's must have accessory :)

Angela, we can indeed! Fudge aplenty!

Thomaslynn, sleep well. That sounds perfect. You have made me very happy. In return I will say everything is either "hellish good" or "hellish bad" in a shrill voice, and at the bed of FYF whilst I'm trying to sort our the piles of anoraks I shall shout "whose coat is this jacket?!"

Growingold, cute and practical

Posting on here is becoming a nightmare as wifi keeps dropping!

We may all be in Oz by morning. And I don't mean Australia.

Wish me luck!

We had winds of over 107mph earlier, still quite scary now.

This is the first time today I've had Wifi.

Would you be very put out if the stallions were replaced with a bungalow?
tis either going to be Oz or fyf depending on wind speed

Oh and good luck!!

Eau, you too! It's supposed to be really bad until 9pm

at bungalow. As long as it squishes UW